“- Sarah: Tomorrow my parents are going to know I'm not a virgin anymore!
- Tom: You haven't been a virgin since college.
- Sarah: Yeah, but tomorrow they're going to know for sure.”

Brittany Murphy - Sarah
Ashton Kutcher - Tom

“My dad always drives my mum, so that means I gotta ride you!”
Glenndon Chatman - Young Quincy

“If I wasn't happily married and you weren't my wife's stepsister I'd have an affair with you in a second.”
Alan Alda - Sidney Miller

“Watching my parents renew their wedding vows is like watching ambulance drivers push the victims back into the wreck.”
Aden Young - Rick Dunne

“- Faith Corvatch: Why couldn't we just have arranged marriages in America?
- Kate: Yeah, at least you could spend the rest of your life blaming your parents instead of yourself.”
Marisa Tomei - Faith Corvatch
Bonnie Hunt - Kate