“- Lady in T-Bird: Are you a mechanic?
- Vance: No ma'am.
- Lady in T-Bird: What do you do?
- Vance: Not a whole lot.
- Lady in T-Bird: What do you mean?
- Vance: I mean, like, zero.”
Jane Berman - Lady in T-Bird
Willem Dafoe - Vance

“I'm just tryin' to keep everything in balance, Woodrow. You do more work than you got to, so it's my obligation to do less.”
Robert Duvall - Augustus 'Gus' McCrae

“- Janet Beindorf: It's been 14 years and you haven't even finished the bathroom.
- Ned Beindorf: I've been working for 14 years!
- Janet Beindorf: And what's my job? Is it a hobby?”

Jamie Lee Curtis - Janet Beindorf
Kevin Pollak - Ned Beindorf

“- Ordell Robbie: You know you smoke too much of that shit, that shit gonna rob you of your own ambition.
- Melanie Ralston: Not if your ambition is to get high and watch TV...”
Samuel L. Jackson - Ordell Robbie
Bridget Fonda - Melanie Ralston

“- Det. Sgt. Lestrade: I despise your arrogance.
- Sherlock Holmes: And I despise your laziness.”
Roger Ashton-Griffiths - Det. Sgt. Lestrade
Nicholas Rowe - Sherlock Holmes