“- Farmer Ted: I know I came on kinda like a poozer on the bus tonight and everything. But... that's just so my friends won't think, you know, I'm a jerk.
- Samantha: But they're all pretty much jerks, though, aren't they?
- Farmer Ted: Yeah, but the thing is, I'm kinda like the leader, you know? Kinda like the king of the dipshits.”
Anthony Michael Hall - Farmer Ted
Molly Ringwald - Samantha

“Can't you understand? I'm trying to do something noble for once in my life. Now get out of here before I change my mind. Come on.”

Cary Grant - Walter Burns

“- Rita: Phil, why weren't you like this last night? You just fell asleep.
- Phil: It was the end of a very long day.”

Andie MacDowell - Rita
Bill Murray - Phil

“There is a line you cross, you don't never come back from. Point of no return. Dave crossed it. I'm here with him. That means I am going along for the ride. The whole ride. All the way to the end of the line, wherever that is.”

Al Pacino - Carlito

“- Maurine Collier: I just don't understand what went wrong. His whole life he was so grown-up, so polite.
- Karen Collier: War changes people.
- Maurine Collier: War doesn't make you rude to your parents!”

Kathy Bates - Maurine Collier
Kimberly Williams-Paisley - Karen Collier