“They're just using the same actor over and over. What kind of cut-rate production is this?”

John Deszo Ratzenberger - Mack

“Did you know Tom Cruise had no idea he was in that vampire movie till two years later?”

Steve Martin - Bowfinger

“It's like a Bruce Lee movie without Bruce.”

Loren Avedon - Jake Donahue

“- Jack Gable: Laura is more than a body.
- Cable Man: Laura?
- Jack Gable: Laura Claybourne, she plays Rachel.
- Cable Man: Sorry, you must really follow this shit.
- Jack Gable: No, I write this shit.”

John Candy - Jack Gable
Mark Boone Junior - Cable Man

- David: Hey, did you ever see "School of Rock"?
- Andy: Yeah.
- David: Well, this is... it's called "School of…" you know...
- Andy: That's nice.
- David: But it stars Jack Black Cock.
- Andy: That makes sense.

Paul Rudd - David
Steve Carrell - Andy