“- Young Robert: He said that Han Solo was cooler than Captain Kirk.
- Imaginary William Shatner: Kick the little fucker's ass.”

Spencer Klein - Young Robert
William Shatner - Bill

You know that one scene in "The Wizard Of Oz"... when the flying monkeys pull apart the scarecrow? That's what it was like.

John C. Reilly - Dale Doback

“- Killer: Do you like scary movies?
- Screw: What do you mean? Like Spike Lee movies?
- Killer: Look, lay off the Spikester! He's keeping it real!”
Chris Palermo - Killer
Aimee Graham - Screw

“- Senator Jummy Simpson: I've seen that girl somewhere before.
- Liza Prescott: She's a very particular friend of the director who's making this picture. He sticks her in every scene he can.”

Walter Kingsford - Senator Jummy Simpson
Billie Burke - Liza Prescott

“My eyes still hurt from reading that movie.”

Eddie Murphy - Insp. Scott Roper