“My parents used to beat the living shit out of me, okay? And I'm glad they did, and I'm looking forward to beating the shit out of my kids!”

Denis Colin Leary - Himself

“Attention all campers, it's 9:30... and that's lights-out time here at Camp Northstar, 9:30 as you know. Tomorrow is parents day, and you must look rested or Morty will be sent to the state penitentiary.”
Bill Murray - Tripper

“- Cecil: They talk out loud in the theatre once the feature has begun.
- Honey: Oh, that really is unforgivable, Fidget.
- Fidget: Okay, okay! My parents are the enemies of film!”

Stephen Dorff - Cecil
Melanie Griffith - Honey Whitlock
Eric Barry - Fidget

“Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today because you're all dead... and it's all my fault. Mom, Dad, you fed me, kept a roof over my head until I killed you. Which I guess doesn't make me a very good son. But I'm gonna try to change.”
Devon Sawa - Anton Tobias

“I remember how her little hand used to fit inside mine.”
Steve Martin - George Banks