“- Freb: You ever feel bad about any of this?
- Donny Astricky: Hell, no. I'm Robin Hood, man. I rob from the rich and give to the needy.
- Freb: You mean the poor.
- Donny Astricky: No, like I said, the needy. 'Cause brother, we need this car.”

James Duval - Freb
Chi McBride - Donny Astricky

“- Staunton's Secretary: I was in California once. How do you get any work done with all that sunshine?
- Katherine Ann Watson: We tan in class.”
Julia Roberts - Katherine Ann Watson

“- Roy O'Bannon: There's this new thing they're starting out in California: moving pictures. There's no sound, so we won't have to worry about the language problem, and I think the kung fu stuff could be huge! People are dying for a good action flick.
- Chon Wang: Chon Wang, movie star? It could work.”
Owen Wilson - Roy O'Bannon
Jackie Chan - Chon Wang

“I sent two healthy 65-year old parents to South Florida. 30 years later - dead! I mean what is it, the water, the air - it's a death camp!”
Robert Klein - Himself

“California's like a beautiful, wild... beautiful, wild girl on heroin... who's high as a kite, thinkin' she's on top of the world, not knowing she's dying even if you show her the marks.”
Mickey Rourke - The Motorcycle Boy