“My name is Schmidt, but I changed it to Smith. That's what I got against these guys more than anything else. They make me ashamed of the name I was born with.”

William Bendix - Gus Smith

“Well, you should be embarrassed because your parents named you after bottled water!”

Molly Shannon - Mary Katherine Gallagher

“My dear Constance, the name of Wilde will be a word of execration for the next thousand years.”
Judy Parfitt - Lady Mount-Temple

“The subconscious never makes a mistake. She gave you the ring she didn't want - his ring - and she kept the one she wanted - yours.”

Oskar Holmolka - Prof. Gurkakoff

“These are facts, sir. Not school book history, not Mr. Wells's history, but history nevertheless. They sent this foot-high jeweled bird to Charles, who was then in Spain. They sent it in a galley commanded by a member of the Order. It never reached Spain.”

Sydney Greenstreet - Kasper Gutman