Dave Chappelle movie quotes

“If you remember anything that I tell you, remember this: James Brown is the baddest motherfucker in show business.”
Dave Chappelle - Disco Cabbie

“- Willard Fillmore: What the hell did you do that for?
- Rusty P. Hayes: I was scared!
- Willard Fillmore: So everytime you're scared you hit a guy over the head with a desk lamp?”

Norm MacDonald - Willard Fillmore
Dave Chappelle - Rusty P. Hayes

“The computer, another idea stolen from the black man.”
Dave Chappelle - Conspiracy Brother

“- Lance: I feel black.
- Conspiracy Brother: But you look white... don't touch me!”
Neil Patrick Harris - Lance
Dave Chappelle - Conspiracy Brother

“- Miles Logan: Put your hands on the Oodles of Noodles.
- Tulley: Chicken or beef?
- Miles Logan: Chicken. Cool. Cool is good.
- Tulley: Miles?
- Miles Logan: Tulley? What are you doing?
- Tulley: I'm freaking working over here.”
Martin Lawrence - Miles Logan
Dave Chappelle - Tulley

“- Pinball: [in the cockpit of the plane] What's up, man. So, you Swamp Thing?
- Swamp Thing: That's right.
- Pinball: Flyin' the plane?
- Swamp Thing: That's right.
- Pinball: It's amazing the shit you white trash know.
- Swamp Thing: That's right.”
Dave Chappelle - Pinball
M.C. Gainey - Swamp Thing

“Man, white men can't jump.”

Dave Chappelle - Ahchoo

“What do you think? Things don't just happen by accident! Sometimes people - mostly white people - make things happen!”
Dave Chappelle - Conspiracy Brother

“- Ahchoo: Blinkin! How did you do that?
- Blinkin: I heard that coming a mile away.
- Robin Hood: Right-o, Blinkin, very good.
- Blinkin: Pardon? Who's talking?”

Dave Chappelle - Ahchoo
Mark Blankfield - Blinkin
Cary Elwes - Robin Hood

“- Scarface: Man, you didn't say nothing 'bout no door, yo!
- Thurgood Jenkins: Just chill out, man. I smoked weed here all the time. This door's never locked.
[Scarface opens the door, the alarm goes off]
- Thurgood Jenkins: I didn't say the alarm would be off, though. I just said it's never locked.”

Guillermo Díaz - Scarface
Dave Chappelle - Thurgood Jenkins

- Robin Hood: As my first order of business, I would like to appoint a new Sheriff... my friend Ahchoo.
- Crowd: A black sheriff?
- Blinkin: He's black?
- Ahchoo: And why not? It worked in "Blazing Saddles".
Cary Elwes - Robin Hood
Mark Blankfield - Blinkin
Dave Chappelle - Ahchoo

“Boy's so fat, when he goes outside with a red shirt on, all the kids in the neighborhood shout Kool Aid!”
Dave Chappelle - Reggie Warrington