Jeff Daniels movie quotes

“- John Sculley: But if you want me to stay, you can't have Steve. Settle him out. He can keep a share of stock so he gets our newsletter. I'd like the secretary to call for a vote.
- Steve Jobs: I fucking dare you.”

Jeff Daniels - John Sculley
Michael Fassbender - Steve Jobs

- Harry Dunne: Lloyd? I think that was her "gran-gina."
- Mrs. Snergle: That's right. So you can cross that one off your bucket list.
Jeff Daniels - Harry Dunne
Jo Helton - Mrs. Snergle

“- Delbert McClintock: Spiders would find your barn a tad breazy this time of year. In that respect, spiders are a bit like you and me. No, I frankly doubt there are any spiders in your barn.
- Ross Jennings: Well, I frankly know there is Delbert. I saw a web! There is a web in my barn!
- Delbert McClintock: A web would indicate an arachnoid...” (continue)(continue reading)
John Goodman - Delbert McClintock
Jeff Daniels - Ross Jennings

“Oh, there's a comforting sound!”

Jeff Daniels - Lewis

“- Rep. George Fergus: What's up? How did you find me?
- Cal McAffrey: I followed the trail of crumbs, congressman.”
Jeff Daniels - Rep. George Fergus
Russell Crowe - Cal McAffrey

“- Irene: I'm Irene; I don't believe in name tags.
- Charlie Driggs: Oh. Hi. Ah... Charlie. I never had many concrete convictions about 'em one way or another.”

Margaret Colin - Irene
Jeff Daniels - Charles Driggs

- Harry: Fuck you!
- Howard Payne: Oh! In two hundred years we've gone from "I regret but I have one life to give for my country" to "fuck you"?
Jeff Daniels - Harry
Dennis Hopper - Howard Payne

“- Uncle Martin: Wake up, Tim. There's a big day ahead of us.
- Tim O'Hara: It's still night time. You've been asleep for 30 seconds.
- Uncle Martin: 30 seconds? I was tired!”
Chris Lloyd - Uncle Martin
Jeff Daniels - Tim O'Hara

“- State Trooper: Pullover!
- Harry Dunne: No, it's a cardigan, but thanks for noticing.”

Harland Williams - State Trooper
Jeff Daniels - Harry Dunne

“Comedy is hard to do. All the cliches about it are true.”
Jeff Daniels

“The actors tend not to want to watch themselves very often. I'm one of those guys.”
Jeff Daniels

“Give me good writing, and I'll play it all day.”
Jeff Daniels

“I have done all of the genres, and the dramatic role is my favorite.”
Jeff Daniels

“You know, it's really strange now with the Internet, with everyone having an unsolicited, anonymous opinion.”
Jeff Daniels

“War is a scourge, but so is slavery. It is the systematic coercion of one group of men over another. It has been around since the book of Genesis. It exists in every corner of the world, but that is no excuse for us to tolerate it here when we find it right infront of our very eyes in our own country.”
Jeff Daniels - Lt. Col. Joshua Lawrence Chamberlain

“- Lewis: What do you call a mushroom that walks into a bar and buys everyone a drink?
- Chris Pratt: I don't know.
- Lewis: A fungi.”
Jeff Daniels - Lewis
Joseph-Gordon Levitt - Chris Pratt

“- Harry Dunne: Boy, I sure wish I could have been there when she was little.
- Lloyd Christmas: Whatever. That's all water under the fridge now, Har. Think of the bright side. You're finally getting to meet her, and you never had to change those poopy diapers.
- Harry Dunne: That's called being a parent, Lloyd. Besides, I changed your poopy...” (continue)(continue reading)
Jeff Daniels - Harry Dunne
Jim Carrey - Lloyd Christmas

“- Harry Dunne: How many days are in April?
- Lloyd Christmas: 30 days have September, all the rest I can't remember!
- Harry Dunne: Must be 31 because nothing rhymes with August...
- Lloyd Christmas: Nah I think it's 32 Harry. April's a leap month.”
Jeff Daniels - Harry Dunne
Jim Carrey - Lloyd Christmas

“Generals can do anything. There's nothing so much like a god on earth as a General on a battlefield.”
Jeff Daniels - Col. Joshua Lawrence Chamberlain

“Fools aren't born, Pongo; pretty girls make them in their spare time.”
Jeff Daniels - Roger

“- Dr. Alex Tremor: Can't you see how dangerous you are?
- Marina Lemke: You say that listening to your heart and trusting what you feel, is that what you're calling dangerous?”
Jeff Daniels - Dr. Alex Tremor
Demi Moore - Marina Lemke

“- Harry Dunne: Yeah, I lost my job too.
- Lloyd Christmas: Man, You are one pathetic loser. No offense.
- Harry Dunne: No, none taken.”
Jeff Daniels - Harry Dunne
Jim Carrey - Lloyd Christmas

“The itsy-bitsy spider crawled up the water spout; down came the rain and washed the spider out.”
Jeff Daniels - Ross Jennings

“I get turned down more times than the beds at the Holiday Inn.”
Jeff Daniels - Lewis

“You make love without fading out?”

Jeff Daniels - Tom Baxter