Joan Cusack movie quotes

“- Debbie Jellinsky: With your looks, your charm... women must follow you everywhere!
- Uncle Fester Addams: Store detectives.”
Joan Cusack - Debbie Jellinsky
Chris Lloyd - Uncle Fester

“You never forget kids like Emily, or Andy, but they forget you.”
Joan Cusack - Jessie the Yodeling Cowgirl

“This isn't your home. It was our parents home! But I don't see you making any contributions. You've got no wife, no kids. You insult the only family you have. You keep this up and you'll die alone, like a dog, like a bum, like Van Gogh.”

Joan Cusack - Gail Dwyer

“- Tess McGill: I know what I'm doing.
- Cyn: Yeah, screwing up your life.
- Tess McGill: No, I'm trying to make it better! I'm not gonna spend the rest of my life working my ass off and getting nowhere just because I followed rules that I had nothing to do with setting up, ok?”
Melanie Griffith - Tess McGill
Joan Cusack - Cyn

“- Joe Devine: Can you help me find a script?
- Fanny Nash: This is Hollywood. Just go outside and ask anyone you see to give you a script. A gardener, a cripple, a child molester. They've all got 'em.”
Alec Baldwin - Joe Devine
Joan Cusack - Fanny Nash

“- Alsatia Zevo: I'm very disappointed that you never once had an applesauce sandwich on your menu.
- Joe at Cafeteria: Applesauce? Miss Zevo, the sandwich will get all soggy.
- Alsatia Zevo: Oh, I don't mind.
- Joe at Cafeteria: I make you one tomorrow, okay?
- Alsatia Zevo: Okay, thank you very much.”
Joan Cusack - Alsatia Zevo
Manny Portel - Joe at Cafeteria

“- Buzz Lightyear: Ma'am? I, uh, um, well, I just wanted to say you're a bright young woman with a beautiful yarn full of hair. A hair full of yarn. It's ah... um... I must go.
- Jessie the Yodeling Cowgirl: Well aren't you just the sweetest space toy I ever did meet!”
Tim Allen - Buzz Lightyear
Joan Cusack - Jessie the Yodeling Cowgirl

“- Blair Litton: You think anyone who's proud of the work we do is an ass-kisser.
- Aaron Altman: No, I think anyone who puckers up their lips and presses it against their bosses buttocks and then smooches is an ass-kisser.”
Joan Cusack - Blair Litton
Albert Brooks - Aaron Altman

“- Gail Dwyer: Who is that, honey?
- Marty: It's, uh, my mother.
- Gail Dwyer: I thought she was dead!
- Marty: Yeah, I know, it's really weird!”
Joan Cusack - Gail Dwyer
Tom Arnold - Marty Dwyer

“- Kermit: Ms. Bitterman, you can take the Muppet Theatre, but you'll never take the theatre in our hearts!
- Rachel Bitterman: That's good, because I don't want the theatre in your hearts; I want the theatre that exists in reality!”
Steve Whitmire - Kermit
Joan Cusack - Rachel Bitterman

“- Uncle Fester Addams: What are you saying?
- Debbie Jellinsky: I'm saying I want you dead and I want your money.
- Uncle Fester Addams: But... but... don't you love me?
- Debbie Jellinsky: Ah ha ha ha!
- Uncle Fester Addams: Is that a no?”
Chris Lloyd - Uncle Fester
Joan Cusack - Debbie Jellinsky

“- Gina: Look at this place... I mean, would you look at that toilet? It's the most disgusting toilet I ever saw! What if you had to pee right now?
- Val: Just shut up, I do have to go pee right now!”
Joan Cusack - Gina
Dedee Pfeiffer - Val

“- Debbie Jellinsky: Would you die for me?
- Uncle Fester Addams: Yes.
- Debbie Jellinsky: Promise?”
Joan Cusack - Debbie Jellinsky
Chris Lloyd - Uncle Fester

“My name is Ruth Meyers. Call me Ruth Meyers.”
Joan Cusack - Ruth Meyers

“- Hannah Stubbs: I see that it's funny. I have a sense of humor.
- Barney: Of course you have a sense of humor. Everyone thinks they do, even people who don't.”
Joan Cusack - Hannah Stubbs
Rick Moranis - Barney Coopersmith

“- Emily Montgomery: Are you really gay?
- Howard Brackett: Hmm-hmm...
- Emily Montgomery: Was there... any other time you might've told me this? I'm wearing a wedding dress, which you picked out!”
Joan Cusack - Emily Montgomery
Kevin Kline - Howard Brackett

“- Alsatia Zevo: You know, you remind me a lot of my brother.
- Captain Patrick Zevo: That's impossible. We're exact opposites.
- Alsatia Zevo: That's what I mean. He's all silly and soft on the outside and on the inside he's really strong and you're just the opposite.”
Joan Cusack - Alsatia Zevo
LL Cool J - Captain Patrick Zevo