Peter Boyle movie quotes

- Harvey "Blind" Pew: It sounded as though there was a bit of a squabble.
- Moon: Squabble? They're all dead!
- Harvey "Blind" Pew: Oh! Must have been more of a tiff then.
John Marwood Cleese - Blind Pew
Peter Boyle - Moon

“- Jack McDermott: Stop! Who dares to tow the van of the living Christ?
- Driver: The city of New York, Tarzan! $50 for the violation, $75 for the tow and $20 a day for storage.
- Jack McDermott: Father, forgive us for we have sinned! We parked our car in a forbidden zone!”
Peter Boyle - Jack McDermott

“Use unnecessary force, if necessary!”
Peter Boyle - Police Chief Spiro T. Edsel

“- Scott Calvin: Great! I'm starving.
- Susan: I'll have a salad and iced tea, and dressing on the side.
- Mr. Whittle: Ah, pasta and tomatoes, uh, and very light on the oil. Can you do that?
- Scott Calvin: And I'll have a caesar. No dressing. And one of those homemade cookies, the warm chocolate chip. No nuts. And a little slice of cheesecake....” (continue)(continue reading)
Tim Allen - Scott Calvin
Judith Scott - Susan
Peter Boyle - Mr. Whittle

“In live stage, the actor lives.”
Peter Boyle

“I don't think I would be an actor if I was that intelligent.”
Peter Boyle

“Opera? Just what the world needs: more fat women screaming.”
Peter Boyle

“- Jack McDermott: You told me you played for the New York Rangers.
- Billy Caufield: Are you saying I didn't?
- Dr. Weitzman: Attacking a referee on the ice doesn't make you a hockey player either.”
Peter Boyle - Jack McDermott
Michael Keaton - Billy Caufield
Dennis Boutsikaris - Dr. Weitzman

“I am the lord they god. Thou shalt not have strange gods before me. Out of my way, asshole.”
Peter Boyle - Jack McDermott

- Jack McDermott: What about dinner? Who's gonna get us our dinner?
- Billy Caufield: "Who's gonna get us our...". Aren't you the same guy who changed water into wine? Huh? J.C.? Ain't the son of god good for a burger in his town? You get us something!
- Jack McDermott: That's not funny. You're a very disturbed young man.
- Billy Caufield: Man... (continue)(continue reading)
Peter Boyle - Jack McDermott
Michael Keaton - Billy Caufield

“- Sheppard: If you're looking for money, you're smarter than you look. If you're not, you're a lot dumber.
- O'Niel: Then I'm probably a lot dumber.
- Sheppard: That could be very dangerous.”

Peter Boyle - Sheppard
Sir Sean Connery - O'Niel

“This is the body and blood of our savior, the lord Jesus Christ. And a damned fine beaujolais!”
Peter Boyle - Jack McDermott

“A lot of strange things happen in this world. Things you don't know about in Grand Rapids. Things you don't want to know about. Doors that shouldn't be opened.”
Peter Boyle - Andy Mast

“You ain't no man till you split dark oak.”
Peter Boyle - Buck Grotowski

“For as long as I can remember people have hated me. They looked at my face and my body and they ran away in horror. In my loneliness I decided that if I could not inspire love, which is my deepest hope, I would instead cause fear.”
Peter Boyle - The Monster

“- Johnny Dangerously:Take it easy!
- Jocko Dundee: Take it easy? I'm standing here with my dork in my hand!”

Michael Keaton - Johnny Dangerously
Peter Boyle - Jocko Dundee

“- Sheppard: Did you really destroy the entire shipment?
- O'Niel: Yes.
- Sheppard: You do have a flair for the dramatic.”

Peter Boyle - Sheppard
Sir Sean Connery - O'Niel

“- Jack McDermott: Let me hold the gun.
- Henry Sikorsky: No.
- Jack McDermott: I let you sit in the front seat!”
Peter Boyle - Jack McDermott
Chris Lloyd - Henry Sikorsky

“- Dr. Verboven: Jack, Jesus Christ would never point a gun at another human being.
- Jack McDermott: Stay out of my psychosis!”
MacIntyre Dixon - Dr. Verboven
Peter Boyle - Jack McDermott

“Like a lot of people thought I was dead but, uh... hey, you know, you don't write any postcards when you're on the road to self-discovery.”
Peter Boyle - Lazlo

“Let me tell you what you're dealing with here. I run a franchise. The company hired me to dig as much ore out of this hellhole as possible. My hookers are clean, some of them are good looking. My booze isn't watered. The workers are happy. When the workers are happy, they dig more ore. They get paid more bonus money. When they dig more ore, the...” (continue)(continue reading)

Peter Boyle - Sheppard

“That's too much power for one man to have.”

Peter Boyle - Captain Green

“- Jack McDermott: We are all naked in the eyes of the Lord.
- Henry Sikorsky: Stop! This man is clinically insane! He is presently undergoing treatment at Cedarbrook hospital under my supervision!”
Peter Boyle - Jack McDermott
Chris Lloyd - Henry Sikorsky

“- Henry Sikorsky: Hey guys, time for a hug?
- Jack McDermott: I don't think so.
- Billy Caufield: Maybe after the game.”
Chris Lloyd - Henry Sikorsky
Peter Boyle - Jack McDermott
Michael Keaton - Billy Caufield

“There are two theories. The first is that this is an organized conspiracy. The other more bizarre theory is that this is the work of one man, Superman, apparently!”
Peter Boyle - Det. Ryan