Ron White movie quotes

“I believe, that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade. And try to find somebody who's life gives them vodka, and have a party.”
Ron White - Himself

“Some guys wanted to take me to a topless bar. I didn't want to go but I ended up going, cause you guys will back me up on this, you've seen one woman nekid... you wanna see the rest of them nekid!”
Ron White - Ron White

“Some states are trying to abolish the death penalty... my states puttin in an express lane.”
Ron White - Ron White

“The first time my wife and I made love... you ever heard of those screamers? Well, apparently she had never been with one before!”

Ron White - Himself

“You know, he don't have a straight angle in that whole god-damned porch, or the whole house for that matter. He is the worst damn carpenter.”

Ron White - Clyde Ledbetter

“I believe that ignorance of the law is no excuse, and I'm quoting a New York City judge on this one.”
Ron White - Himself

“Her father dies, and I'm like, baby come on we're going to the nursing home. And she see's all these old men like pick me pick me. She wanted a black one, but I was like keep it simple, that's my motto.”
Ron White - Himself

“In Texas we have the death penalty, and we use it! If you come to Texas and kill somebody, we will kill you back! That's our policy!”
Ron White - Ron White

The new slogan now is "Diamonds: Render her speechless". Why don't they just go ahead and say it? "Diamonds: That'll shut her up... for a minute".

Ron White - Ron White