William H. Macy movie quotes

“- Walt Price: How are we coming with the dead horse scene?
- Marty Rossen: You can't actually kill the horse.
- Walt Price: Aw, fuck me!”
William H. Macy - Walt Price
David Paymer - Marty Rossen

“- The Shoveller: Lucille, God gave me a gift. I shovel well. I shovel very well.
- Lucille: Honey, you shovel better than any man I've ever known, but that does not make you a superhero. Listen to me. You're a good husband, and a good father. But that's all. Nothing more.”
William H. Macy - Shoveler
Jenifer Lewis - Lucille

“- Mrs. Porter: I'm a burden on you.
- Bill Porter: Well, now we're even.”
Helen Mirren - Mrs. Porter
William H. Macy - Bill Porter

“- Walt Price: What's in the bag?
- Marty Rossen: My undies, cause, you can't get this film off on time I'm gonna wet myself.”
William H. Macy - Walt Price
David Paymer - Marty Rossen

I'm gonna tell you what the old whore said, and this is the truest thing I know: "When you start cumming with the customers, it's time to quit".

William H. Macy - Tim Sullivan

“- Mr. Furious: What's his power?
- The Blue Raja: Well, he's terribly mysterious.
- Mr. Furious: That's it? That's his power? He's mysterious?
- The Blue Raja: Well, terribly mysterious.
- The Shoveller: Plus he can, like, cut guns in half with his mind.”

Ben Stiller - Furious
Hank Azaria - Blue Raja
William H. Macy - Shoveler

“Give me the meanest steak you got! Rare, and I mean rare! Just de-horn it, wipe its butt and send it in.”
William H. Macy - Chappy

“- Marty Rossen: This is good. Have you tried it?
- Walt Price: Oh, like I'm really going to eat carbohydrates.”

David Paymer - Marty Rossen
William H. Macy - Walt Price

“- Amanda Kirby: Dr. Grant, you have no idea how important it is to us that you come along. It would make all the difference.
- Dr. Grant: Mrs. Kirby, I...I...
- Paul Kirby: And of course, we'd love to make a contribution to your research here. So... I could write all kinds of numbers on this check, Dr. Grant. Tell me, what's it gonna take?”
Téa Leoni - Amanda Kirby
Sam Neill - Dr. Alan Grant
William H. Macy - Paul Kirby

“- Dr. Grant: Why me?
- Paul Kirby: He said we needed someone who'd been on the island before.
- Udesky: Yes, but I did not tell you to kidnap somebody!”
Sam Neill - Dr. Alan Grant
William H. Macy - Paul Kirby
Michael Jeter - Udesky

“- Paul Kirby: What was that?
- Billy Brennan: That's a Tyrannosaurus.
- Dr. Grant: I don't think so. It sounds bigger.”

William H. Macy - Paul Kirby
Alessandro Nivola - Billy Brennan
Sam Neill - Dr. Alan Grant

“- Gladys Sullivan: Oh, I'm sorry, I put a little vodka in there. Is it too much for you?
- Bill Porter: I probably shouldn't. I walk like a drunken sailor as it is.”
Kathy Baker - Gladys Sullivan
William H. Macy - Bill Porter

“- Bobby Gold: You mad at me?
- Tim Sullivan: I'm mad at you! I'm not gonna invite you to my birthday party! You dumb kike. Go get your holster fixed.”
Joe Mantegna - Bobby Gold
William H. Macy - Tim Sullivan

“- Lucille: A lot of other men I could have married, Eddie - still are!
- The Shoveller: I understand.
- Lucille: If one person vomits in my pool, I'm divorcing you!
- The Shoveller: That's fair.”

Jenifer Lewis - Lucille
William H. Macy - Shoveler

“- Carl Showalter: Three people were killed last night in Brainerd. We're in a load of trouble, Jerry. I'm comin' there tomorrow. You have the money ready by then.
- Jerry Lundegaard: Now, we had a deal. A deal's a deal.
- Carl Showalter: Is it, Jerry? Why don't you ask those three poor souls in Brainerd if a deal's a deal? Go ahead, ask them!”

Steve Buscemi - Carl Showalter
William H. Macy - Jerry Lundegaard

“We're always quickest to doubt people who have a reputation for being honest.”
William H. Macy - Milton Arbogast

“Someone has seen her, all right. Someone always sees a girl with $400,000.”
William H. Macy - Milton Arbogast