“Back to School” quotes
(1986)Plot – Thornton Melon, owner of a well established “big size” clothing chain, enrolls at Grand Lake University to follow his son Jason, who is lonely and depressed. Thornton has never been to college, but he understands the importance of education and wants to help his beloved son. Having drastically changed Jason's room, he befriends many students and answers back the haughty Business Administration professor - who is dating Date Turner, the English Literature professor with whom Thornton is flirting. Jason, energized by his father’s efficiency and exuberance, feels reassured. Getting ready for exams proves difficult for Thornton but he manages to pass every class. His greatest success will be during the final swimming competition: with a perfect and spectacular dive he will lead his and Jason's team to win the contest. After that, Thornton will go back to his hectic business life.
All actors – Rodney Dangerfield, Sally Kellerman, Burt Young, Keith Gordon, Robert Downey Jr., Paxton Whitehead, Terry Farrell, M. Emmet Walsh, Adrienne Barbeau, William Zabka, Ned Beatty, Severn Darden
show all“Back to School” Quotes 23 quotes
“Oh, we were doomed from the start. I'm an Earth sign. She's a Water sign. Together, we made mud.”
“- Thornton Melon: All right. I'll say it. 'Cause Truman was too much of a pussy wimp to let MacArthur go in there and blow out those Commie bastards!
- Professor Terguson: Good answer. Good answer. I like the way you think. I'm gonna be watching you.
- Thornton Melon: [chuckling to his classmates] Good teacher. He really seems to care. About...” (continue)(continue reading)“- Thornton Melon: How 'bout tomorrow night?
- Dr. Diane Turner: I have class then, too.
- Thornton Melon: I'll tell you what, then. Why don't you call me some time when you have no class?
- Dr. Diane Turner: [laughs] Alright. Maybe I will.”“So take it from me, Thornton Melon, if you want to look thin, you hang out with fat people.”
“And just remember, the best thing about kids... is making them!”
“When you make love, do you have to give directions? At the zoo, do the elephants throw you peanuts? Do you look at a menu and say 'ok'?”
“The football team at my high school, they were tough. After they sacked the quarterback, they went after his family.”
“I think I'm attracted to teachers. Yeah, I took out an English teacher. That didn't work out at all. I sent her a love letter... she corrected it!”
- Dr. Diane Turner: How would you characterize "The Great Gatsby"?
- Thornton Melon: He was... uh... great!“- Jason Melon: Uh, we got Economics tomorrow at 11 o'clock.
- Thornton Melon: 11 o'clock? No good. I got a massage 11 o'clock. Tell 'em to make it 2 o'clock.
- Jason Melon: No, dad. Uh, you don't get it. They're not gonna re-schedule the classes around your massage.
- Thornton Melon: All right, 11 o'clock, but I'm gonna talk to that Dean. I mean...” (continue)(continue reading)“- Trendy Man: Mr. Melon, your wife was just showing us her Klimt.
- Thornton Melon: You too, huh? She's shown it to everybody.
- Trendy Man: Well, she's very proud of it.
- Thornton Melon: I'm proud of mine too. I don't go waving it around at parties, though.
- Trendy Man: It's an exceptional painting.
- Thornton Melon: Oh, the painting.”“I don't know. I can't figure women out. Today, they're... independent. They only think about themselves. Why, during sex, Vanessa, she used to scream out her own name!”
“- Thornton Melon: What's your favorite subject?
- Bubbles the Hot Tub Girl: Poetry.
- Thornton Melon: Really? Well, maybe you can help me straighten out my Longfellow.”
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