“Muppet Treasure Island” quotes

(1996)
Movie Muppet Treasure Island
Title Muppet Treasure Island
Year 1996
Director Brian Henson
Genre Comedy, Musical, Romance, Adventure, Family, Action
Plot – Having received a treasure map from a mysterious sailor, the young Jim Hawkins, together with his friends Gonzo and Rizzo, sails off to a journey that should lead them to an island where the elusive treasure is buried. Sir Squire Trelawney, the bold Captain Smollett and the unruly Long John Silver join them as well. It is up to Captain Smollet and his men to save Jim when Silver and his mob take him hostage and seize the map. But who will save the Captain and his loyal men from the local warthog tribe led by Miss Piggy?
All actors – Tim Curry, Billy Connolly, Jennifer Saunders, Kevin Bishop, Dave Goelz, Steve Whitmire, Jerry Nelson, Kevin Clash, Bill Barretta, Frank Oz, John Henson, Danny Blackner
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  • “- The Great Gonzo: I thought pirates had talking parrots as pets.
    - Long John Silver: Talking... parrots?
    - Bad Polly: What an imagination. First pirates, now talking parrots, what's next - a singing, dancing mouse with his own amusement park?”

    Dave Goelz - The Great Gonzo
    Tim Curry - Long John Silver
    Kevin Clash - Bad Polly
  • “If you're going to be the cook on this ship, Mr. Silver, I am definitely going to need bigger pants.”
    Steve Whitmire - Rizzo the Rat
  • “I've gone way beyond afraid. Right now I'm somewhere between bedwetting and a near death experience.”
    Steve Whitmire - Rizzo the Rat
    [Tag:fear]
  • “- Rizzo the Rat: What's wrong?
    - The Great Gonzo: It just feels so weird.
    - Rizzo the Rat: You mean that Mr. Arrow's dead?
    - The Great Gonzo: Yeah, that... and my pants are filled with starfish.
    - Rizzo the Rat: You and your hobbies.”

    Steve Whitmire - Rizzo the Rat
    Dave Goelz - The Great Gonzo
    [Tag:stupidity]
  • “I could have been a lawyer, but I just had too much heart.”
    Kevin Clash - Bad Polly
  • “- Jim Hawkins: I hate my life.
    - The Great Gonzo: I hate your life, too.
    - Rizzo the Rat: If I had a life, I'd hate it.”

    Kevin Bishop - Jim Hawkins
    Dave Goelz - The Great Gonzo
    Steve Whitmire - Rizzo the Rat
  • “- Zoot: Hey man, I can't figure out what side we're on. Are we with the pirates or the frog captain?
    - Floyd Pepper: Oh, hey, man. Just play the gig. Never get involved in politics.”

    Dave Goelz - Zoot
    Jerry Nelson - Floyd Pepper
    [Tag:parties, politics]
  • “- The Great Gonzo: Every storm we ride is its own reward.
    - Rizzo the Rat: And people die by falling overboard.”

    Dave Goelz - The Great Gonzo
    Steve Whitmire - Rizzo the Rat
    [Tag:danger, death, storm]
  • “- Statler: Waldorf, you old fool! We're heroes! We saved the pig and the frog.
    - Waldorf: Well, it was too late to save the movie.”

    Jerry Nelson - Statler
    Dave Goelz - Waldorf
    [Tag:actors, movie]
  • “- Jim Hawkins: Here you go, your bread and water for the day.
    - Mad Monty: But I ordered shrimp scampi!
    - Long John Silver: It's more than y'deserve y'villainous dolts!”

    Kevin Bishop - Jim Hawkins
    Jerry Nelson - Mad Monty
    Tim Curry - Long John Silver
    [Tag:food, merit]
  • “- Rizzo the Rat: He's some kind of a blind fiend.
    - The Great Gonzo: I believe they prefer visually challenged fiend.”

    Steve Whitmire - Rizzo the Rat
    Dave Goelz - The Great Gonzo
    [Tag:blindness]
  • “You know, the ocean. The big blue wet thing.”
    Steve Whitmire - Rizzo the Rat
    [Tag:ocean]
  • “- Rizzo the Rat: Terrific. Captured by crazed wild pigs and sacrificed hideously before a pagan altar.
    - The Great Gonzo: Are we lucky or what?”

    Steve Whitmire - Rizzo the Rat
    Dave Goelz - The Great Gonzo
    [Tag:luck, magic, sacrifice]
Highlights