“Ted 2” quotes
(2015)
Title Ted 2
Year 2015
Director Seth MacFarlane
Genre Comedy
Year 2015
Director Seth MacFarlane
Genre Comedy
Plot – John is now a bachelor, while Ted is married with Tami-Lynn. The couple is suffering its first marital problems and decides to have a baby, but the Commonwealth of Massachusetts declares Ted is not a human being, so their adoption application is rejected. Ted is angry and dejected and asks his best friend to help him.
All actors – Mark Wahlberg, Seth MacFarlane, Amanda Seyfried, Jessica Barth, Giovanni Ribisi, Morgan Freeman, Sam J. Jones, Patrick Warburton, Michael Dorn, Bill Smitrovich, John Slattery, Cocoa Brown, John Carroll Lynch, Ron Canada, Liam Neeson, Dennis Haysbert, Patrick Stewart, Tom Brady, Jay Leno, Jimmy Kimmel, Kate McKinnon, Bobby Moynihan, Taran Killam, Sebastian Arcelus, Jay Patterson, Steve Callaghan, Nana Visitor, Maggie Geha, Jessica Szohr, Craig Ricci Shaynak, Lexi Atkins, Jack Knight, Lauren Sanchez, William Xifaras, Altina Lester, Curtis Stigers, Julius Sharpe, Liz Morgan, Alec Sulkin, Ralph Garman, Michael Steven Costello, Vanessa Vander Pluym, J. Mark Donaldson, Frank Lloyd, Bart A. Piscitello Jr., Becki Dennis, Robert Holfelder, Michael Trisler, Ryan Hanna, Kate Gustafson, David Goldman, Ted Jessup, Ronobir Lahiri, Barry Ratcliffe, Chris Regan, Nefetari Spencer, Jeffrey Stubblefield, Wellesley Wild, Lenny Clarke, Chris Neville, Rachael MacFarlane, Christy Scott Cashman, Joseph J. Micucci, Josiah Blount, Johnny Alves, Silvio Cuadra, Dustin Ybarra, Matthew J. Walters, Aaron Zell, Scott Wahle, John Viener, Kate B. O'Brien, Billy Concha, Andrew Torres, Luke Adams, Tara Strong, Tiffany, Alin Halajian, , Ahmed al-Gendy, Giovanni Alabiso, James Alonardo, Stanis Krista Ames, Garsha Arristos, Joseph Aviel, Kt Baldassaro, Danny Barba, Laura-Elise Barrett, Shahira Barry, Joshua W. Beasley, Brando Benetton, Tom Berklund, Vincent M. Biscione, Josiah Black, Amanda Blattner, Ronald Boone, Anissa Borrego, David Boston, Bill Bouris, D. Patrick Bowles, Jim Boyd, Eliane Brick, Del Brown, Jodie Brunelle, Lorna j Brunelle, Deanna Buonomo, Mark Burzenski, José Báez, Roseny Carrero, Philip Casnoff, Bryan Casserly, Herbert Centeno, Julio Cesar, Chia Chen, Jason Chu, Leonel Claude, Danny Connelly, Lexie Contursi, Guy Cooper, Jeffrey Corazzini, Stevie Costa, Chassidy Cox, Alexandra Creteau, Denise Crisci, Benjamin Crocker, Vincent Cucuzza, John Curcio, Edgar Damatian, Kayla Delehant, Joseph Aaron Delgado, Steven Dougherty, Nea Dune, Michael Eauslin, Tyler Rae Edwards, Diana Emuge, Elvis Dino Esquivel, Steven Fallas, Jimmy Fallon, Brian Patrick Farrell, Erica Ficklin, Michelle Fonseca, John Franchi, Victor Franko, Isaac Gallego, Aldo Gallinar, Connor Garelick, Cody Gari, Susan Garibotto, Sharon J. Geyer, John Gigliotti, Ed Goode, Phyllis A. Gordon, Tom Granger, Karl carlo Green, Charles Greene, Elaine Victoria Grey, David Greyson, Tina Grimm, Enku Gubaie, Riley Halden, London Hall, Joe P. Harris, Justin Harris, Becky Harvey, Mackenzie Hawe, Brandon Henschel, Nick Hentsch, Leila Hilali, Roshanda Hill, Ronald James Hoff Jr, Rosemary Howard, Kimberly Howe, Stacey Forbes Iwanicki, Jahmilla Jackson, Nicole Jesson, Avan Jogia, Jenelle Jones, Susan Jude, Lynn Julian, Ken Kansky, Karli Karissa, Kasland, Kate Kellaway, Bobby Kenney, J Parker Kent, Kelly Marie Kesler, Remington Keyes, Slim Khezri, Kimberlee Kidd, Jarred Kiel, Jeffery Kincannon, Brittany King, Martin Klebba, E'va Krause, Madeleyn Kurg, Hashim Lafond, Frank Lagana, Patrick Languzzi, Morgan Larson, Henry Laun, Toi'ya Leatherwood, Davide Leone, Diana Lestat, Kandiss Marie Lewis, Frank Lui Geo, Jo Luijten, Phyllis Lynn, Robin Lynn, Paige MacLean, Michael John Madden, Bill Maher, Anna Maiche, James Majeau, Tom Mariano, Victoria Martonne, Sophie Mazzaro, Katie McCabe, Austin McCarthy, Olivia McCarthy, Stephanie McIntyre, Anna McNiven, Franklin Mejia, Kaitlin Mesh, Brian Metran, Kristina Mezzetti, Shayla Mitchell, Adrian M. Mompoint, Dan Moyers, Kim Mulhauser, Cassidy Neal, Michele New, Robert Nickerson, Lance Norris, Jesse O'Neill, Joseph Oliveira, Richard Pacheco, Arissa Page, Chris Palermo, And Palladino, Nick Palma, Gary Palmer, Nicole Parrish, Doug Payton, Jonathan Peacy, Elizabeth Pollard, Noelle Poulson, Rob Raco, Jessica Rainville, Aaron F. Randell, Steven Rears, Doug Reed, Adam Reeser, Curtis Reid, Stew Replogle, Eddie Resendes, David Riccio Jr., Lisa Richman, Jenny Robinson, Gary Roscoe, Sagan Rose, Sandra Rosko, Lee Roth, Ariana Ruckle, Krista Saab, Megan Sacco, Luis Salazar, Erik Salmonson, Isabella Sanchez, Brandon Scales, Tioka Bernard Schluter IV, Julie Schmid, Tania Serrano, Eric Shackelford, Jeff Sicile, Benji Sills, Catalina Snape, Dwayne Sneed, Anita Soto, Chaunty Spillane, Bryan Stamp, Nick Steele, Katherine Stephens-Miller, Luci Suicide, Michael Steven Swanson, Amy Tardugno, Jim Templar, Noelle Trudeau, Jonathan Vega, George J. Vezina, Nicolas Villamizar, Marco Virgilio, Kyle Viveiros, Isabel Wagner, Patrick M. Walsh, Jason Weary, Christopher Weigel, Mike Wendt, Amy Whalen, Monay Williams, Sandra E Williams, Joseph Wilson, Genoveva Winsen, Robert Woo, Sandra Yap, Adam Zalt, Venezia Zavala, Claudia Zielke, Amanda Zocco
show all“Ted 2” Quotes 14 quotes
“- John: That's great! I mean, just like Sam L. Jackson.
- Samantha Jackson: Who is that?
- Ted: You ever seen any movie ever? He's the black guy.”“- Samantha Jackson: Alright, I've got 'Dred Scott v. Sandford', 'Plessy v. Ferguson', and 'Brown v. The Board of Education'.
- John: I got 'Kramer vs. Kramer', 'Alien vs. Predator', and 'Freddy vs. Jason'.”“I'm real sorry, that barn just came out of nowhere.”
“- Judge: Ms. Jackson please control your client or I will hold you both in contempt of court.
- Ted: Oh piss off! All right? I'm standing up for me, and I 'm standing up for the homos! We deserve respect!
- Samantha Jackson: Ted shut up!”- Samantha Jackson: Do I have "fuck me" eyes?
- Ted: No, you have "Give me the ring, my precious" eyes.“- Samantha: They've denied you the same rights as everybody else, just because you're different.
- Ted: Can you get me my life back?”“- Joy: Look at that! You see them two white niggers over there?
- Ted: Yeah, what?
- Joy: Look at them! They so happy, because they got that little baby keeping them together. If they didn't have that baby, they'd just be two sad-ass white niggers waiting for Downton Abbey to come on.”“Happily ever after only exists in fairy tales. Yet a talking teddy bear is about to marry his girlfriend, proving that Americans don't give a crap about anything.”
“- Ted: So I got some big news. Tami-Lynn and I are going to have a baby.
- John: That's awesome! Wait, how do you guys...
- Ted: We need a sperm donor.”“- Samantha Jackson: Ted, do you love your wife?
- Shep Wild: Objection. She's not his wife. The marriage was annulled.
- Samantha Jackson: I'll rephrase. Do you love Tami-Lynn?
- Ted: I love my wife. Okay, my wife. More than anything in the world. We're married, I don't care what anybody says.”“- Tami-Lynn: Oh my god, Teddy, look at this. It says if we want to have a baby, you're gonna have to prove you're a person in a court of law.
- Ted: This is a nightmare.”
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