“The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert” quotes

“Is it true when you were born the doctor turned around and slapped your mother?”

Hugo Weaving - Tick

“- Felicia: There goes the transsexual, last seen heading south. We called her Bernie, but her real name was...
- Tick: Adam?”
Guy Pearce - Felicia
Hugo Weaving - Tick

“Now listen here, you mullet. Why don't you just light your tampon, and blow your box apart? Because it's the only bang you're ever gonna get, sweetheart!”

Terence Stamp - Bernadette

“- Robert 'Bob' Spart: If you don't mind me asking, what kind of cabaret act do you do?
- Felicia: We dress up in women's clothes and parade around mouthing the words to other people's songs.”
Bill Hunter - Robert 'Bob' Spart
Guy Pearce - Felicia

“- Benjamin: [about his Dad] Does he have a boyfriend at the moment?
- Felicia: No, no he doesn't.
- Benjamin: Neither does Mum. She used to have a girlfriend, but she got over her.”
Mark Holmes - Benjamin
Guy Pearce - Felicia

“- Bernadette: We've only recently discovered that young Anthony here, bats for both teams.
- Mitzi: I do not!
- Felicia: Oh, so we're straight?
- Mitzi: No.
- Felicia: Oh, we're not. So we're a donut puncher, after all?
- Mitzi: No.
- Felicia: Then what the hell are we?
- Mitzi: I don't fuckin' know.”
Terence Stamp - Bernadette
Hugo Weaving - Mitzi
Guy Pearce - Felicia

- Tick: Kevin had one of those liposuction penis enlargements.
- Felicia: He didn't?
- Tick: Yep. Do you know what they do? They siphon all the fat out of your love handles, and actually inject it into your wing-wang.
- Felicia: Ugh! Yucky! I suppose it gives a whole new meaning to "cracking a fat", though, doesn't it?
Hugo Weaving - Tick
Guy Pearce - Felicia

“These days gentlemen are an endangered species. Unlike bloody drag queens who just keep breeding like rabbits.”
Terence Stamp - Bernadette

“- Felicia: Do you know why this microphone has such a long cord?
- Man In Crowd: Why?
- Felicia: So it's easily retrieved after I've shoved it up your ass.”
Guy Pearce - Felicia

“- Aboriginal Man: So... You actually make money by dressing up like a woman?
- Tick: Oh, sure. You can make a fine living in a pair of heels.”
Alan Dargin - Aboriginal Man
Hugo Weaving - Tick

“- Bernadette: I'll join this conversation on the proviso that we stop bitching about people, talking about wigs, dresses, bust sizes, penises, drugs, night clubs, and bloody Abba!
- Tick: Doesn't give us much to talk about then, does it?”
Terence Stamp - Bernadette
Hugo Weaving - Tick