Experiment quotes

“- Scotty: I told him that I could not only beam a grapefruit from one planet to the adjacent planet in the same system, which is easy, by the way, I could do it with a life form. So, I tested it out on Admiral Archer's prized beagle.
- James T. Kirk: Wait, I know that dog. What happened to it?
- Scotty: I'll tell you when it reappears. Ahem. I...” (continue)(continue reading)
Simon Pegg - Scotty
Chris Pine - James T. Kirk

“- Teddy Daniels: Guy’s name is George Noyce, nice college kid, socialist. He gets offered some money to do a psyche study. Guess what they were studying?
- Chuck Aule: Toothpastes.
- Teddy Daniels: He starts seeing dragons everywhere.”

Leonardo DiCaprio - Teddy Daniels
Mark Ruffalo - Chuck Aule

“I've done some psych experiments, but in my mind I'm still about to write my great Broadway musical.”
Peter Sarsgaard - Stanley Milgram

“- Bernie Focker: Why can't you support my dreams the way I've always supported yours? When you wanted to try new sex positions for your research, I was your guinea pig!
- Roz Focker: You volunteered!
- Bernie Focker: I pulled my hamstring doing a reverse cowgirl!
- Roz Focker: That's because you did it backwards.”
Dustin Hoffman - Bernie Focker
Barbra Streisand - Roz Focker

“He'd always have to do some kind of art, y'know, usually defacing something. He never had idle hands. It just came out of him. He had to express himself.”
Krist Novoselic - Himself

“This is my test subject, Mike Nelson - a disgustingly mild-mannered dope who's managed to survive every film I've subjected him to. But, perhaps, this movie will drive him to the breaking point and crush his soul. And then I'll unleash it on an unwitting public, and then I will rule the world!”
Trace Beaulieu - Dr. Clayton Forrester

“I am a lethal killing machine. It was a secret government experiment. They did stuff to me. Spooky stuff... anal stuff. It turned me into a dangerous telekinetic.”
Chris Evans - Jensen

“- Louis: What? Uh, you're gonna take a flamethrower for a rat?
- Jacques: No, obesity-breath. This is no ordinary flamethrower. See, I modified this baby myself. I just find the rat, aim, and... kazoom.”
Curly Howard - Louis
Frank Moore - Jacques

“- Wayne Szalinski: I shrunk the kids.
- Diane Szalinski: ... What?
- Wayne Szalinski: And the Thompson kids too. They're about this big, they're in the backyard.
-.Diane Szalinski: What?
- Wayne Szalinski: I threw them out with the trash.”

Rick Moranis - Wayne Szalinski
Marcia Strassman - Diane Szalinski

“- Mrs. Hudson: Oh, he's killed the dog. Again.
- Dr. Watson: [irritated] What have you done to Gladstone now?
- Sherlock Holmes: I was simply testing a new anesthetic. He doesn't mind.”
Geraldine James - Mrs. Hudson
Jude Law - Dr. Watson
Robert Downey Jr. - Sherlock Holmes

“I'm one of those fortunate people who like my job, sir. Got my first chemistry set when I was seven, blew my eyebrows off, we never saw the cat again, been into it ever since.”

Nicolas Cage - Stanley Goodspeed

“The obedience experiments are cited and discussed in nearly every introductory psychology textbook worldwide. My obedience film is screened for every incoming class at West Point. And my methods and results continue to be challenged, scorned, debunked, yet every time a new outrage is unleashed into the world, sanctioned and systematic acts of...” (continue)(continue reading)
Peter Sarsgaard - Stanley Milgram

“This planet is a game preserve. And we're the game. In case you didn't notice, we just got flushed out. They sent the dogs in, just like you if you were stalking boar or shooting quail. They split us apart and they watched. Testing us.”
Adrien Brody - Royce

“You can't make experimental work by copying past work. ”
Trey Parker

- Dr. Walter Jenning: It was just a routine procedure, meant to measure the density of the gases that surround Alpha Centauri. However, partway through the experiment, there was a deviation, and we lost control of the laser spectroscope.
- Howard T. Duck: What do you mean, "lost control"?
- Dr. Walter Jenning: Some unknown force was redirecting... (continue)(continue reading)
Jeffrey Jones - Dr. Walter Jenning
Chip Zien - Howard T. Duck

“- Flora Cranley: I've never seen him like it before. He was always so keen to tell me about his experiments.
- Dr. Arthur Kemp: He meddled in things men should leave alone.”

Gloria Stuart - Flora Cranley
William Harrigan - Dr. Arthur Kemp

I'm feeling particularly evil because today's experiment is a stinky cinematic suppository called "This Island Earth". You may all bow down before me after this stinkburger.
Trace Beaulieu - Dr. Clayton Forrester

“Todd and I are itching to see further, to push the envelope.”
Sam Wood

“I think you get in trouble if you make experimental big studio films.”
Richard Linklater

“- Sherlock Holmes: It's quite infamous in the region of Turkey bordering the Black Sea for its ability to induce an apparently mortal paralysis. Enough to deceive even a medical mind as tenacious and well-trained as yours. It's known locally as...
- Mary Morstan: [noticing] What's wrong with Gladstone?
- Sherlock Holmes: Mad honey disease. Oh,...” (continue)(continue reading)

Robert Downey Jr. - Sherlock Holmes
Kelly Reilly - Mary Morstan

“- The Great Edgar: For my next experiment, I will saw the little maharaja in half.
- Charlie: I'm a victim of sawcumstances.”
Edgar Bergen - The Great Edgar
Charlie McCarthy - Charlie

“- Mr. Taggart: We've no guarantee that these theories of yours are workable.
- Thomas A. Edison: Well, most electricity is theory yet.”
Gene Lockhart - Mr. Taggart
Spencer Tracy - Thomas A. Edison

“I began five years ago, in secret. Working all night, every night, right into the dawn. A thousand experiments. A thousand failures. And then, at last, the great, wonderful day.”
Claude Rains - Dr. Jack Griffin aka The Invisible Man

“Failed treatments to date: Beta blockers, calcium channel blockers, adrenalin injections, high dose ibuprofen, steroids, Trager Mentastics, violent exercise, cafergot suppositories, caffeine, acupuncture, marijuana, Percodan, Midrine, Tenormin, Sansert, homeopathics. No results. No results...”
Sean Gullette - Maximillian Cohen

“I came here for quiet and secrecy. I'm carrying out a difficult experiment. I must be left alone. It's vital! It's life and death that I should be left alone. You don't understand.”
Claude Rains - Dr. Jack Griffin aka The Invisible Man