Team quotes

“- Sonny Weaver Jr.: There's me doing my job, you doing yours. Your job is to coach the team I give you. They do it different in Dallas?
- Coach Penn: Yeah, they do. They win.”
Kevin Costner - Sonny Weaver Jr.
Denis Colin Leary - Coach Penn

“You see so many different personalities and mind-sets in the world of sports, just like you do with actors.”
Marc Blucas

“- Dan Evans: You're so sure that your crew's comin' to get you?
- Byron McElroy: They're lost without him; like a pack of dogs without a master.”

Christian Bale - Dan Evans
Peter Fonda - Byron McElroy

“All we got on this team are a bunch of Jews, spics, niggers, pansies, and a booger-eatin' moron!”
Chris Barnes - Tanner Boyle

“My crew is my family, Kirk. Is there anything you would not do for your family?”
Benedict Cumberbatch - Khan

“I'm going to kill you if we die!”

Chris Tucker - Carter

“All right, this is gonna stop right now! From here on out, you guys are a team. Do you understand? You are going to eat together, sleep together, you are going to pee together, you're gonna file a joint income tax return.”

Craig T. Nelson - Coach

“- Skip: Yah man, I mean those boys are gettin' too big for their boots man.
- Billy Z: Whatever you say, Skip.
- Skip: Aw man c'mon, don't you get it? Those kids are gettin' offers man.
- Billy Z: So why don't you cut 'em in on some of the profits?
- Skip: What profits dickhead? This is a surf shop!”

Heath Ledger - Skip
Elden Henson - Billy Z

“- Maxton: I heard you resigned from the Scouts.
- Jim: I've become an atheist.”
Leslie Phillips - Maxton
Christian Bale - Jim

“From Champs to chumps. Just six months ago, The Texas State Fighting Armadillos were billed as the greatest college football team in history, and now, they are history.”

Chris Berman - Himself

“I've been kicked off the track team, and without track my grades will be based on... my grades.”
Kevin Dillon - Rooney

“- Ralph Houk: You're reading the fan mail? You're letting the fans run the team?
- Dan Topping: The fans pay your salary, Ralph.
- Ralph Houk: Well, you can change the lineup if you want, but not while I'm manager. And I'll tell you something else, the right guy is going to break that stupid record!”
Bruce McGill - Ralph Houk
Bob Gunton - Dan Topping

“- Gil Renard: We could've been teammates. We were teammates, man. We could've made it to the Bigs.
- Coop: It was Little League. We were 12-years-old.”
Robert De Niro - Gil Renard
Charles Hallahan - Coop

“I'm actually a part of this weird wolfpack. Hey, it's not weird it's pretty cool actually, no membership fees.”
Zach Galifianakis - Alan

“- Coach Ed Gennero: Wally, did you hire an Assistant Coach without telling me?
- Coach Wally Rig: No, I found a Quarterback without telling you.
- Coach Ed Gennero: I hope he gets younger as he gets closer.”

Héctor Elizondo - Coach Ed Gennero
Robert Loggia - Coach Wally Rig

“- Fairchild Van Waldenberg: Nothing breaks up a team faster than...
- Stranz Van Waldenberg: Herpes! Uh... jealousy.”
Amy Poehler - Fairchild Van Waldenberg
Will Arnett - Stranz Van Waldenberg

“- Chris Berman: What happened to the players?
- Coach Ed Gennero: All the players from the old team have been expelled and all the coaches have been fired.
- Chris Berman: Where will they get their new players?
- Coach Ed Gennero: Their new players must be real students. No more scholarships, no more monkey business, no more special favors or...” (continue)(continue reading)
Chris Berman - Himself
Héctor Elizondo - Coach Ed Gennero

“How come God hogs up all the good followers, and we're left with the retards?”

John Leguizamo - Clown

“Don't get greedy. What we need now is a sacrifice. A winning team has to know how to manufacture runs.”

Robert De Niro - Gil Renard

“We don't wanna talk, we wanna scream at people, but we don't wanna listen or solve problem and that's what's frustrating about the fucking dynamic of the group.”
Vince Vaughn - Ricky

“- Al Trautwig: Do you think she can get the team out of the basement?
- Rudolph Giuliani: She can't do any worse.”

Al Trautwig - Himself
Rudolph Giuliani - Himself

“- Raphael: Ok, Leo, I'll bite. What're we doing up here?
- Leonardo: I told Splinter I'd get this team in shape again.
- Michelangelo: Hey, I've been training. Since you've left, my videogame scores have, like, doubled.”
Nolan North - Raphael
James Arnold Taylor - Leonardo
Mikey Kelley - Michelangelo

“You're either with me or against me. There's no third position.”
Edward Burns - Jake Vig

“The only show you could ever star in would be a show called the... Not... Funny... Diarrhea Club!”

Paul Kozlowski - HoHo the Clown

“You're my guys and this is our team. Gabriella is not important. I'll forget about her. I'll forget the audition and we'll go out and get that champion for the team. Everybody happy now?”

Zac Efron - Troy Bolton