Paul Rudd movie quotes

“- Wyatt Trips: Lay wheels! I'm being chased by killer beez!
- Ivy Miller: Trips, it's way too cold for killer bees. They need warm climates to survive.”
Paul Rudd - Wyatt Trips
Reese Witherspoon - Ivy Miller

“- Ron Burgundy: Um, Brick, before I let you go, are you still having your celebrity golf tournament?
- Brick Tamland: Um, no, no. Too many people died last year, so we're not gonna.”
Will Ferrell - Ron Burgundy
Paul Rudd - Brick Tamland

“- Tommy Doyle: Where are they? Where's Kara? I feel like I've been drugged.
- Dr. Loomis: We have been drugged.
- Tommy Doyle: I don't understand, why didn't they kill us when they had the chance?
- Dr. Loomis: It's his game, and I know where he wants to play it.”
Paul Rudd - Tommy Doyle
Donald Pleasence - Loomis

“- Nina Borowski: Don't you miss men?
- George Hanson: Yeah, sure. Sometimes. Don't you?
- Nina: I guess.
- George Hanson: But I don't miss them when I'm with you.”
Jennifer Aniston - Nina Borowski
Paul Rudd - George Hanson

“- Katie: hey, I just want us to spend some time together later...
- Andy: Fuck you, dike.
- Katie: Why are you being such an asshole?
- Andy: I've gotta go, but I love you, baby.
- Katie: I'll see you in macrame!!! ”

Marguerite Moreau - Katie
Paul Rudd - Andie

“- Lindsay: What 'cha doing?
- Andy: Writing in my gournal. I write my thoughts in it every day.
- Lindsay: Oh, you mean a journal?
- Andy: Yeah, whatever. I guess I'm not all smart like you. ”
Elizabeth Banks - Lindsay
Paul Rudd - Andy

“- Pete: Just don't ask me to lend you any money.
- Ben Stone: Can I just - have some?”
Paul Rudd - Pete
Seth Rogen - Ben Stone

- Wyatt Trips: You are an incubus. A hell-spawned incubus.
- Ivy Miller: Only a male can be an incubus, if anything, I'm a sucubus.
- Wyatt Trips: Yeah, you got the "suck" part right.
Paul Rudd - Wyatt Trips
Reese Witherspoon - Ivy Miller

“- Danny: Do you like coke?
- Augie: I like the idea of it more than I actually like it.”
Paul Rudd - Danny
Christopher Mintz-Plasse - Augie

“When life gives you lemons, just say 'fuck the lemons', and bail.”
Paul Rudd - Chuck

“I'm simple, that's why I teach first grade.”
Paul Rudd - George Hanson

“- Kevin: What's this?
- Lucy: It's your birthday present, fuck head, open it.”
Paul Rudd - Kevin
Courtney Love - Lucy

“- Andy: You know how when you grab a woman's breast... it feels like... a bag of sand.
- David: What?”
Steve Carrell - Andy
Paul Rudd - David

- David: You know how I know that you're gay?
- Cal: How?
- David: You have a rainbow bumpersticker on your car that says, "I love it when balls are in my face".
- Cal: That's gay?
Paul Rudd - David
Seth Rogen - Cal

“When Michael Myers was six years old, he stabbed hs sister to death. He was locked up for years in Smith's Grove Sanitarium, but he escaped. Soon after, Halloween became another word for mayhem! One by one, he killed his entire family, until his nine-year-old niece, Jamie Lloyd, was the only one left alive. Six years ago, Halloween night, ...” (continue)(continue reading)
Paul Rudd - Tommy Doyle

“You taste like a burger. I don't like you anymore.”
Paul Rudd - Andy

“- Josh: Hey, just because my mother marries someone else, doesn't mean he's my father.
- Cher: Actually, Kato, that's exactly what it means.”
Paul Rudd - Josh
Alicia Silverstone - Cher

- David: Hey, did you ever see "School of Rock"?
- Andy: Yeah.
- David: Well, this is... it's called "School of…" you know...
- Andy: That's nice.
- David: But it stars Jack Black Cock.
- Andy: That makes sense.

Paul Rudd - David
Steve Carrell - Andy

“- Cher: I want to do something for humanity.
- Josh: How about sterilization?”
Alicia Silverstone - Cher
Paul Rudd - Josh

“I ate fiberglass insulation. It wasn't cotton candy like the guy said... my tummy itches.”
Paul Rudd - Brick Tamland

“- Andy: Jesus Christ Katie, you're smothering me. Give me some breathing room, I'm choking here!
- Katie: I just want to spend time with you.
- Andy: My butt itches.
- Katie: Hey, we're soul mates, right?
- Andy: Yeah sure... I mean, whatever, if you want. Hey JJ, save me a waffle!”
Paul Rudd - Andy
Marguerite Moreau - Katie

“- Josh: I think I'd really like to check out Environmental Law.
- Mel Horowitz: Why? You want to have a miserable, frustrating life?”
Paul Rudd - Josh
Dan Hedaya - Mel Horowitz

“- Ivy Miller: You know it's funny I thought you had a girlfriend.
- Wyatt Trips: Me? No... well yeah, but I was just killing time.
- Ivy Miller: Killing time?
- Wyatt Trips: Yeah, killing time until I met you.
- Ivy Miller: Boy, never thought I'd fall for a line like that.”
Reese Witherspoon - Ivy Miller
Paul Rudd - Wyatt Trips

“- Ivy Miller: I'm sorry, were you sleeping?
- Wyatt Trips: Did my closed eyes and peaceful demeanor tip you off?”
Reese Witherspoon - Ivy Miller
Paul Rudd - Wyatt Trips