Awkwardness quotes

“- Doreen Piggot: Slobbering over Honey like that, it was so embarrassing...
- Earl Piggot: I never touched Honey!
- Doreen Piggot: I didn't say you touched her, I said you slobbered on her!”
Lily Tomlin - Doreen Piggot
Tom Waits - Earl Piggot

“- Captain Amelia: You've met my first officer, Mr. Arrow? Sterling, tough, dependable, honest, brave and true.
- Mr. Arrow: Please, Captain...
- Captain Amelia: Oh, shut up, Arrow. You know I don't mean a word of it.”
Emma Thompson - Captain Amelia
Roscoe Lee Browne - Mr. Arrow

“Why are we pretending your bag isn't buzzing? You bought a vibrator.”
Rosie O'Donnell - Sheila

“- Valerie Brown: Who else thinks that Fiona's a freak?
- Melody Valentine: I'm so glad you said that, because as soon as you said her name, I got the most awful sensation. Like this ice-cold chill creeping up my spine.”
Rosario Dawson - Valerie Brown
Tara Reid - Melody Valentine

“- Lucy: Are you pleased to see me?
- Julia: Hello darling... where did you spring from?”

Carrie Mullan - Lucy
Kate Winslet - Julia

- Kevin O'Donnell: Have a nice day!
- Violet Sanford: "Have a nice day"?
- Kevin O'Donnell: Yeah, I panicked, I didn't know what else to say!

Adam Garcia - Kevin O'Donnell
Piper Perabo - Violet Sanford

“- Shaun: Lance, I want you to stay in your room.
- Lance: Why?
- Shaun: Because you're an embarrassment.”
Colin Hanks - Shaun Brumder
Jack Black - Lance Brumder

“- Bunny Lebowski: I'll suck your cock for a thousand dollars.
- Brandt: Ah! Wonderful woman. We're all, we're all very fond of her. Very free-spirited.
- Bunny Lebowski: Brandt can't watch, though, or he has to pay a hundred.
- Brandt: Ah! That's marvelous.
- The Dude: Uh, I'm just gonna go find a cash machine.”

Tara Reid - Bunny Lebowski
Philip Seymour Hoffman - Brandt
Jeff Bridges - The Dude

“- Georgey Sanderson: [reading an adult magazine] Dad, what's a rack?
- Peter Sanderson: It's a country.”
Angus T. Jones - Georgey Sanderson
Steve Martin - Peter Sanderson

“- Joseph: You're gorgeous when you blush. Like a wild flower.
- Georgette: It's my dyspepsia.”
Dominique Pinon - Joseph
Isabelle Nanty - Georgette

“- Michael: You know how they say there are alligators in the sewers?
- Gertie: Alligators in the sewers.
- Mary: All we're trying to say is, maybe you just probably imagined it. It happened...
- Elliott: I couldn't have imagined it!
- Michael: Maybe it was a pervert or a deformed kid or something.”

Robert MacNaughton - Michael
Drew Barrymore - Gertie
Dee Wallace - Mary
Henry Thomas - Elliott

“- Alan Dershowitz: You are a very strange man.
- Claus von Bülow: You have no idea.”
Ron Silver - Alan Dershowitz
Jeremy Irons - Claus von Bülow

“- Bliss: Slide over here. Come on and have a feel, MacArthur. Touch them.
- Ike: Uh.
- Bliss: Don't be shy. That's what they're there for.
- Ike: Uh.
- Bliss: That's it. I know you want them!”

Barbara Bach - Bliss
Wendell Brown - Ike

“Oh, sorry! I thought you were someone el - oh, it's you. Well, that's okay, then.”

Meg Ryan - Anastasia

“I wish we'd known each other... this is a little awkward.”

Chris Farley - Tommy

“- Nurse: Mr. Bond, I need a urine sample. If you could fill this beaker for me?
- James Bond: From here?”
Lucy Hornak - Nurse at Shrublands
Sir Sean Connery - James Bond

“- Audrey: Jon, how long do you think he was watching?
- Harry: I didn't see anything.”

Wendy Crewson - Audrey Aldrich
Don Ameche - Harry Aldrich

“- British ticket agent: Passport, please.
- Charlie Brown: Y-Yes, sir. We're just passing through. We're on our way to France, sir. I have nothing to declare, sir. I throw myself at the mercy of the court!
- Linus van Pelt: We've only been two minutes and already he's embarrassing us.”
Arrin Skelley - Charlie Brown
Daniel Anderson - Linus van Pelt

“- Willie Conway: Wait, wait, wait. This is so weird.
- Tracy Stover: You've never had sex in here before?
- Willie Conway: Not with another person.”

Timothy Hutton - Willie Conway
Annabeth Gish - Tracy Stover

“- George Banks: You look like you're enjoying seeing me in here.
- Nina Banks: Enjoying? Do you think it's enjoyable to get a phone call telling you to come down to the police station because your husband's been arrested for stealing hot dog buns?”
Steve Martin - George Banks
Diane Keaton - Nina Banks

“- Jeff Badger: You are the sheriff wife now. It would be very embarrassing for you to know who I am.
- Flower Belle Lee: I've never been embarrassed in my life.”
Joseph Calleia - Jeff Badger
Mae West - Flower Belle Lee

“- Clooney: What else did you tell him? That I cheat on crossword puzzles? I steal sugar in restaurants? That I wet my bed 'til I was eleven?
- Celia Clooney: No, Victor, believe me, I never mentioned that.”
Jack Lemmon - Victor Clooney
Paula Prentiss - Celia Clooney

“- Col. Nathan R. Jessup: How the hell is your dad, Danny?
- Lt. Daniel Kaffee: He passed away seven years ago, sir.
- Col. Nathan R. Jessup: Don't I feel like the fucking asshole?
- Lt. Daniel Kaffee: Not at all sir.”
Jack Nicholson - Col. Nathan R. Jessup
Tom Cruise - Lt. Daniel Kaffee

“- Randal Graves: Embolism in a pool.
- Dante Hicks: What an embarrassing way to die.”
Jeff Anderson - Randal Graves
Brian O'Halloran - Dante Hicks

“- Chandler: You can't come in.
- Monica: Why not?
- Chandler: Because, uh, Ross is naked.
- Ross: What?
- Chandler: Well, I couldn't tell her I was naked. She's allowed to see me naked.
- Ross: Why does anyone have to be naked?”
Matthew Perry - Chandler Bing
Courteney Cox - Monica Geller
David Schwimmer - Dr. Ross Geller