Character quotes

“Look at you, you ain't no gangster! You're all Mr. 2% Milk, Mr. Khaki Pants, Mr. Touched By An Angel. Get out my face!”
Alex Solowitz - Mickey Parke

“- Jack: When I was about thirteen, I had this sort of identity crisis. I used to think I was one of the characters.
- Angela: You thought you were Audrey Hepburn?
- Jack: No. I used to think I was the cat.”

Jeremy Northam - Jack
Sandra Bullock - Angela

“Can you imagine what this man would be like had anyone ever loved him?”

Paul Sorvino - Henry Kissinger

“- Loan Officer: Do you have any assets?
- Laurel Ayres: I have drive and courage and ambition. And if you'll look at the prospectus, you'll notice that I have a very, very sound business mind too.
- Loan Officer: I was thinking more like stocks, bonds, property.”
Jean De Baer - Loan Officer
Whoopi Goldberg - Laurel Ayres

“We're all so much more complicated than our names.”
Gerard Butler - Dracula

“Life isn't easy for anybody, whether you're normal or super. But you're still Clark Kent. You were raised a certain way and that's never gonna change. Sure, your abilities were part of you, but they didn't define you.”

John Schneider - Jonathan Kent

“- Turner Kendall: He's a hair dresser.
- Alex Sternbergen: That's what he does, that's not what he is.”

Jeff Bridges - Turner Kendall
Jane Seymour Fonda - Alex Sternbergen

“I used to be dangerous. I don't know what happened.”
Holly Hunter - Judith Moore

“- Wayne Campbell: You're worthless! You're less than nothing! What's keeping you here? You don't belong here! Why don't you just quit?
- Milton: Cause I've got no place else to go!”

Mike Myers - Wayne Campbell
Chris Farley - Milton

“He's like two people in one. Sometimes he's like an incredible genius. Then he's also really clueless sometimes, like a child. And he can be really fierce. But he's also really soft. And he can be really romantic... and chivalrous. But the thing is, he's really caring. More than me. More than what I can... give back to him. I just don't know if...” (continue)(continue reading)

Marisa Tomei - Ruby Weaver

- Lt. Theodore 'Ted' Sawyer: My source at the FBI said they didn't think you were, and I quote, "Bureau material".
- Jeff Blue: That's true. I'm more of an end table.
- Jane Blue: I always thought of you as a dining room chair.
- Jeff Blue: Really? I see you as a rosewood armoire with really nice drawers.
Obba Babatundé - Sawyer
Dennis Quaid - Jeff Blue
Kathleen Turner - Jane Blue

“As I've gotten older, I realize I'm certain of only two things. Days that begin with rowing on a lake are better than days that do not. Second, a man's character is his fate.”
Kevin Kline - William Hundert

“That's one of the great things about getting involved with someone from another country. You can't take it personally. What's really terrific is that when we act in ways which might objectively seem asshole-ish or, or, incredibly annoying, they don't get upset at all. They don't take it personally. They just assume it's some national...” (continue)(continue reading)
Taylor Nichols - Ted Boynton

“- Lana Lang: Nietzsche? I didn't know you have a dark side, Clark.
- Clark Kent: Doesn't everyone?
- Lana Lang: So what are you: Man or Superman?
- Clark Kent: I haven't figured it out yet.”

Kristin Kreuk - Lana Lang
Tom Welling - Clark Kent

While officers gather evidence of the grisly crime scene, you can only ask yourselves "What kind of lunatic would commit such unthinkable crimes?". The three adjectives which best describe this killer are sadistic, intelligent and dangerous.
Frank Welker - Special Vocal Effects

“- Ted Pikul: It's none of your business who sent us! We're here and that is all that matters... God, what happened? I didn't mean to say that.
- Allegra Geller: It's your character who said it. It's kind of a schizophrenic feeling, isn't it? You'll get used to it. There are things that have to be said to advance the plot and establish the...” (continue)(continue reading)
Jude Law - Ted Pikul
Jennifer Jason Leigh - Allegra Geller

“- Penny Lane: You're too sweet for rock and roll.
- William Miller: Sweet? Where do you get off? Where do you get sweet? I am dark and mysterious, and pissed off! And I could be very dangerous to all of you! You should know that about me... I am the enemy!”
Kate Hudson - Penny Lane
Patrick Fugit - William Miller

“- Ferdinand Daxus: Do you know who I am?
- Violet Song Jat Shariff: How could I not? Tyrant. Egomaniac. Narcissist. That about sums it up, doesn't it?
- Ferdinand Daxus: Yes it may be true. I may have... quirks.”
Nick Chinlund - Ferdinand Daxus
Milla Jovovich - Violet Song Jat Shariff

“- Steve Stifler: Observe the fuckin' Stifmeister, what is his defining characteristic?
- Jim Levenstein: He uses the F-word excessively?
- Steve Stifler: [grins] Thanks man.”
Seann William Scott - Steve Stifler
Jason Biggs - Jim Levenstein

“You think you've got the market cornered on human suffering? Let me tell you something about people like me. People like me feel lost, and little, and ugly, and dispensable. People like me have husbands, screwing other people far more perfect than me. People like me have sons who hate them.”
Michelle Pfeiffer - Rita

“My mother always said my sister was like wood. As rooted to the Earth as a sakura tree. But she told me I was like water. Water can carve its way through stone. And when trapped, water makes a new path.”
Shizuko Hoshi - Sayuri Narration

“Dad was a card. I never met him. He died before the movie began.”
Jeff Daniels - Tom Baxter

“- Frida Kahlo: I love a man with melones that are bigger than mine.
- Diego Rivera: And I love a woman with cojones.”
Salma Hayek - Frida Kahlo
Alfred Molina - Diego Rivera

“- Gus: I thought you said he was a rock and roll star.
- Lt. Walker: He was a retired rock and roll star.
- Capt. Talcott: A civic-minded, very respectable rock and roll star.”
George Dzundza - Gus
Denis Arndt - Lieutenant Walker
Chelcie Ross - Captain Talcott

“- Fiona Brewer: Will, am I a bad mother?
- Will Freeman: No. No, you're not a bad mother. You're just a barking lunatic.”
Toni Collette - Fiona Brewer
Hugh Grant - Will Freeman