Layoff quotes

“- Ollie Quinn: Officer Raymer is currently under suspension.
- Judge Flatt: Anesthesia is what he should be under.”
Jerry Mayer - Ollie Quinn
Philip Bosco - Judge Flatt

“- Brittany Foster: I showed you how things worked around here because I sympathized with you, being the outsider. But just remember this, I brought you in... and if you decide to fuck with me I can just easily throw you out!
- Adrien Williams: Am I supposed to be scared now?
- Brittany Foster: I would be.”
Susan Ward - Brittany
Lori Heuring - Adrien

“If the 405 is your morning route, I hope you don't have a history of showing up late to work, 'cause today you're fired.”

Tamala Jones - Laura Leeton

“At least they didn't shoot you this time.”

Matthew Bruch - Nick Miller

“- Honey Daniels: I want you to fire 'em. I want you to tell them why you're not using 'em.
- Michael Ellis: What makes you think I care what you want?”

Jessica Alba - Honey Daniels
David Moscow - Michael Ellis

“- Darryl Witherspoon: Yo sir! Yo! Difference of opinion here.
- Economics Professor: Uh, Darryl. And we can do without the yo-ing.
- Darryl Witherspoon: What he's saying is let's help people by firing them. Now this seems to me, ebonically speaking, wack.
- Scott Thorpe: Perhaps Darryl does have a special insight into the blue-collar or, should...” (continue)(continue reading)
Marlon Wayans - Darryl Witherspoon
John Ingle - Economics Professor
David Spade - Scott Thorpe

“- The Chief: I'm tired of you disrespecting me! Give me one good reason why I shouldn't fire your black-ass?
- Undercover Brother: Because I... don't... work for you?
- The Chief: Shut up! Save the smart comments for the chunky brother in the smock!”
Chi McBride - The Chief
Eddie Griffin - Undercover Brother

“- Ed Dillinger: ENCOM isn't the business you started in your garage anymore. We're building accounts in thirty different countries. New defense systems. We have one of the most sophisticated pieces of equipment in existence.
- Dr. Walter Gibbs: Oh, I know all that. Sometimes I wish I were back in that garage.
- Ed Dillinger: That can be arranged...” (continue)(continue reading)
David Warner - Ed Dillinger
Barnard Hughes - Dr. Walter Gibbs

“Mrs. Tingle, I have waited twenty years to tell you this. You're fired.”
Michael McKean - Principal Potter

“- Frank Pierce: You said if I came in late for another shift, you'd fire me.
- Captain Barney: I'll fire you tomorrow.”
Nicolas Cage - Frank Pierce
Arthur J. Nascarella - Captain Barney

“- Lawrence Van Dough: 37-and-a-half miles of driveway, and you park in the 5 feet with a puddle!
- Chauffeur: I'm very sorry, sir.
- Lawrence Van Dough: You're very sorry? Well, in that case, find another job.”
John Larroquette - Lawrence Van Dough
David Fawcett - Chauffeur

“- April O'Neil: My nearest neighbors are about four miles away. I need to get to a phone and call my boss.
- Casey Jones: You mean Charles?
- April O'Neil: Yes; how did you know that?
- Casey Jones: He left a message on your machine, uh, just before we got out...
- April O'Neil: And?
- Casey Jones: Well, hey, you just saved yourself an...” (continue)(continue reading)
Judith Hoag - April O'Neil
Elias Koteas - Casey Jones

“- Dean Burbage: Our approaches are quite different. Unfortunately for you, I happen to be the head of the department.
- Geoffrey Fisher: Why don't you fire me then?
- Dean Burbage: I don't want to fire you Geoffrey. I just want you to produce.
- Geoffrey Fisher: You can't fire me can you? You know that if anyone around here is going to strike...” (continue)(continue reading)
Stephen Root - Dean Burbage
John Pankow - Geoffrey Fisher

“- Dr. Donna Burke: We, the board members present, think that you should tender your resignation.
- Alex Jurel: My resignation? What for?
- Dr. Donna Burke: Because, Mr. Jurel, no one here wants to go through the pain of firing you.”
Lee Grant - Dr. Donna Burke
Nick Nolte - Alex Jurel

“- Mr. Yamaguchi: Now, Ms. LaBouche. You are dismissed.
- Coco LaBouche: Dismissed? But no one fires Coco LaBouche. Coco LaBouche fires others!”
Mako - Mr. Yamaguchi
Susan Sarandon - Coco LaBouche

“- Sofia Provolone: Now you fired the maid?
- Angelo 'Snaps' Provolone: No! She quit to marry Bruce Underwood!
- Sofia Provolone: When did that happen?
- Angelo 'Snaps' Provolone: I don't know... somewhere between my vest and my pants.”
Ornella Muti - Sofia Provolone
Sylvester Stallone - Angelo 'Snaps' Provolone

“- Maximillian 'Max' Shreck: Selina! Selina Kyle, you're fired! And Bruce Wayne, why are you dressed up like Batman?
- Catwoman: Because he is Batman, you moron!
- Maximillian 'Max' Shreck: Was.”

Christopher Walken - Max Shreck
Michelle Pfeiffer - Catwoman

“- Captain Gannon: Frank won't be coming into work today Joe.
- Friday: 24 hour virus?
- Captain Gannon: Or tomorrow.
- Friday: 48 hour?
- Captain Gannon: Frank quit, moved to Ukiah, bought a goat farm...”
Harry Morgan - Gannon
Dan Aykroyd - Friday

“- Norville Barnes: What do you do if the envelope is too big for the slot?
- Ancient Sorter: Well, if you fold 'em, they fire you. I usually throw 'em out.”

Tim Robbins - Norville Barnes
Patrick Cranshaw - Ancient Sorter

“I have something to say. I'm not going to wait for Wadsworth here to unmask me. I work for the State Department, and I'm a homosexual. I feel no personal shame or guilt about this, but I must keep it a secret, or I will lose my job on security grounds.”
Michael McKean - Mr. Green

“- Cliff Vandercave: I want you to fire Bernard Rubble.
- Fred Flintstone: Done! Wait, fire Barney, why?
- Cliff Vandercave: Well, he scored the lowest on the company aptitude test. He's an imbecile. The company can't afford to have dead weight like him on the payroll.
- Fred Flintstone: But Mr. Vandercave, he's got a new kid, a mortgage, I'm his...” (continue)(continue reading)
Kyle MacLachlan - Cliff Vandercave
John Goodman - Fred Flintstone

“- Dolores: By the way, I fired Ramon yesterday.
- Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr: Ramon? Ramon is such a fine man. What did he do?
- Dolores: He came up behind me and he grabbed my breasts.
- Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr: What? I haven't even done that yet.”

Kathleen Turner - Dolores Benedict
Steve Martin - Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr

“- Whitaker: One more word out of you, Cynthia, and you're fired.
- Cynthia: Oh, and which word would that be? Asshole? Shithead?”
Rob Reiner - Whitaker
Ellen Lee DeGeneres - Cynthia

- Luigi Patrovita: I gave you the courtesy of this talk because you worked for me a long time. Like I said, close down everything and get out... or one morning you are gonna wake up dead.
- Martin Lamanski: Luigi, I got employees, obligations... There's plenty for both of us.
- Luigi Patrovita: There's no "both of us". There's just me. You got 2... (continue)(continue reading)
Sam Wanamaker - Luigi Patrovita
Steven Hill - Martin Lamanski

“- Ivan Alexeev: Josh, losing those jobs is the best thing that ever happened to us! We're free to pursue our destiny!
- Josh Tager: What, abysmal failure?
- Ivan Alexeev: Negativity festers in you, man!”
John Cusack - Ivan Alexeev
Tim Robbins - Josh Tager