Relatives quotes

“- Annie: This is Grandfather.
- Hallie: He's so cute. What do we call him?
- Annie: Grandfather.
- Hallie: That makes sense.
- Annie: This is Martin. He's our Butler.
- Hallie: [surprised] We have a Butler? ”

Lindsay Lohan - Annie James
Lindsay Lohan - Hallie Parker

“He's not my dad, he's my stepdad!”

Simon Pegg - Shaun

“Aunt Agnes, just remember you are not losing a niece, you are gaining a man who is... awfully good at croquet and who can probably greet the wedding guests in Greek, Latin... and hieroglyphics.”
Georgina Cates - Emily

“We're not just an uncle and a niece. It's something else. I know you. I know you don't tell people a lot of things. I don't either. I have a feeling that inside you there's something nobody knows about... something secret and wonderful. I'll find it out.”

Teresa Wright - Charlie Newton

“- Royal Tenenbaum: Well, what does she feel about that?
- Richie Tenenbaum: I think she feels confused.
- Royal Tenenbaum: Well, I can understand that, it's probably illegal!
- Richie Tenenbaum: I don't think so, we're not related by blood.
- Royal Tenenbaum: That's true. It's still frowned upon. But then, what isn't these days, right?”

Gene Hackman - Royal Tenenbaum
Luke Wilson - Richie Tenenbaum

“- Brantley Foster: I like you, I really like you, but I gotta tell you, I have become seriously and emotionally involved with someone who isn't my aunt.
- Vera Prescott: I forgive you, Brantley.”
Michael J. Fox - Brantley Foster
Margaret Whitton - Vera Prescott

“- Eugene Morris Jerome: I think I'm in love with her.
- Stanley: Well forget it, she's your cousin!
- Eugene Morris Jerome: What's wrong with being in love with your cousin?
- Stanley: Because it's against the laws of nature! You can't marry your first cousin, you'll get babies with nine heads!”
Jonathan Silverman - Eugene Morris Jerome
Brian Drillinger - Stanley

“- Dorian Montier: I'd like to be the father-to-be.
- Sally Jackson: You can't be the father and the brother! That's the kind of thing that messes kids up!”
Luke Wilson - Dorian Montier
Drew Barrymore - Sally Jackson

“- James Fitzmaurice: Don't you remember? Cousins can do things that other people can't. And we were more than children before anyone knew what we were up to.
- Juliana: Even we didn't know.”
Richard R. Grant - James Fitzmaurice
Greta Scacchi - Juliana

“This is just what my mom was afraid of: peer pressure. And it's coming from my grandfather.”
Joseph Mazzello - Charles

“You wouldn't put Ted, Ryce or Emily in a kennel, and Beethoven's our cousin too!”

Michaela Gallo - Sara Newton

“- Linus Caldwell: What did I say?
- Danny Ocean: You called his niece a whore.
- Rusty Ryan: A very cheap one.
- Danny Ocean: She's seven.”

Matt Damon - Linus Caldwell
George Clooney - Danny Ocean
Brad Pitt - Rusty Ryan

“Everybody I ever knew just treated me like I was dog shit, even my fuckin' grandmother. Could you believe an Italian grandma would treat her sweet, little bambino like a fuckin' herpe?”
Oliver Platt - Fulvio Nesstra

“Other people's parents are always nicer than our own, and yet for some reason, our own grandparents are always nicer than other people's.”

Eva Green - Isabelle

“- Caroline: When did you get here?
- Adam: Ten.
- Caroline: Ten? That was almost two hours ago. You'd rather be out here with my cat than inside with... than inside with a room full of strangers and relatives.”
Marisa Tomei - Caroline
Christian Slater - Adam

“- Todd Wolfhouse: We've got to go back and get grandpa's ashes.
- Jan Wolfhouse: You go, I'm never leaving this place.”
Erik Stolhanske - Todd Wolfhouse
Paul Soter - Jan Wolfhouse

“- Lon: I can't see who's calling me a loser.
- Zack: Well, I'll give you a hint. He waxes his forearms and lost his virginity in the Boy Scouts.
- Lon: Uncle Donny?”
Andy Dick - Lon
Dane Cook - Zack

“Doesn't it strike you odd that none of our relatives are related to us?”

Liam Aiken - Klaus

“They're two of the dearest, sweetest, kindest, old ladies that ever walked the Earth. They're out of this world. They're like, they're like pressed rose leaves.”

Edward McNamara - Brophy

“Have you come across a bigger shithead than my stepfather?”
Jason Ritter - Martin Brockett

“- Anthony: They suck really good. Just like you, Ruby.
- Richie: Come on. Relax.
- Ruby: Yeah, I learned from your mother, dick.
- Anthony: You're gonna let your sister talk that way to me?
- Brian: She's my half-sister.”
Al Palagonia - Anthony
Adrien Brody - Richie
Jennifer Esposito - Ruby
Ken Garito - Brian

“- Arlene: Look who's here, Uncle Jon.
- Steve: The asshole from Chicago?
- Arlene: That's him.”

Christine Ebersole - Arlene Aldrich
T.J. Parish - Steve

“I don't go much for this lineage shit. I'm not related to anyone famous, and this family-line bullshit makes me feel insecure. My belief is, if you come from dirt, you'll fight better, because you don't want to go back to the dirt. The best fighters in the world are people with nothing to lose.”

Dean Stockwell - General Lancaster

- Buddy Young Jr.: For me, my family was like, uh, Dances With Jews. Oh sure, we had names for our relatives like they had in that movie.
- Reporter: What do you mean?
- Buddy Young Jr.: Well, we had "Eats With His Hands", "Spits When He Talks", "Makes Noise When He Bends", "Sweats Like a Pig", "Whines In a Cab", "Never Buys Retail", "Shaves His... (continue)(continue reading)
Billy Crystal - Buddy Young Jr.
Richard Kind - Reporter

“- Max Dugan: Maybe I'm your father, but you're not my daughter. Do you know what Kierkegaard once said?
- Nora McPhee: Yes! And I'm not interested in any more of your roommates!”
Jason Robards - Max Dugan
Marsha Mason - Nora McPhee