Teachers quotes

“I try to give them a little culture now and then so they don't beat each other to death with bicycle chains all the time.”

Woody Allen - David Dobel

“- Professor Stephen Malley: You know, professors aren't teachers, they're salesman.
- Janine Roth: Okay, so what do you sell?
- Professor Stephen Malley: You, to you.”
Robert Redford - Professor Stephen Malley
Meryl Streep - Janine Roth

“I think I'm attracted to teachers. Yeah, I took out an English teacher. That didn't work out at all. I sent her a love letter... she corrected it!”
Rodney Dangerfield - Thornton Melon

- Trevor McKinney: Were you just being nice?
- Eugene Simonet: About what?
- Trevor McKinney: About my idea. Do you think it's good, or were you just being teachery?
- Eugene Simonet: "Teachery"?
- Trevor McKinney: Bullshitting.
Haley Joel Osment - Trevor McKinney
Kevin Spacey - Eugene Simonet

“- Mr. Flugel: What do you teach?
- Ms. Copuletta: Sex education.
- Mr. Flugel: What?
- Ms. Copuletta: Sex education.
- Mr. Flugel: Sex education? That's my favorite subject!”
Richard Stahl - Mr. Flugel
Sylvia Kristel - Ms. Copuletta

“- Dale Denton: Why don't you go fuck yourself, you weird little prick?
- Mr. Edwards: I'm a teacher, okay? You can't talk to me like that, guy.
- Dale Denton: I'm not a student, so I can say whatever the fuck I want, you chimp-fucking little bastard.”
Seth Rogen - Dale Denton
Joe Lo Truglio - Mr. Edwards

“- Jack's Mother: What it is you do, Mr. Staggliano?
- Vinny Staggliano: College professor.
- Jack's Mother: What do you teach?
- Vinny Staggliano: College stuff. What are you, a fucking cop?”
Bernadette Birkett - Jack's Mother
Ray Liotta - Vinny Staggliano

“- Teacher: Oh, and Mr. Larkin, perhaps you'd like to share with the rest of the class, Patrick Henry's immortal last words?
- Link Larkin: Kiss my ass?”
Joe Parro - Teacher
Zac Efron - Link Larkin

“I usually have at least a month before I am faced with student in women's underwear or an artist's rendering of my persona dangling from the rafters. And we're only in the first week. It's frightening to imagine what could happen by Christmas, isn't it?”

James D. O'Reilly - Mr. Bernhardt

“Two tigers cannot live on the same mountain. Likewise, two teachers cannot have the same student!”
Jackie Chan - Lu Yan

“- Obi-Wan Kenobi: Why do I get the feeling you're going to be the death of me?
- Anakin Skywalker: Don't say that, master. You're the closest thing I have to a father.”
Ewan McGregor - Ben Obi-Wan Kenobi
Hayden Christensen - Anakin Skywalker

- Amy Mayfield: You filmed Sandra's death.
- Professor Solomon: It's called "cinéma vérité". Nice touch, don't you think?
- Amy Mayfield: It was out of focus. But you know what they say; those who can't do, teach.
Jennifer Morrison - Amy Mayfield
Hart Bochner - Professor Solomon

“I'm simple, that's why I teach first grade.”
Paul Rudd - George Hanson

“High school is not a democracy. Teachers don't wait.”

Jay Thomas - Coach Bill Meister

“- Ray: Hey, did you teach your students how to make things like this?
- Mr. Mehlor: Have you been in a high school recently? My students taught ME how to make stuff like this.”
Ricky Harris - Ray
Dann Florek - Mr. Mehlor

“- Michael Corben: Don't worry about Grober, I can handle her.
- Patricia Grober: Don't count on it. I'm gonna be on your ass every minute of this trip. I'm gonna be sitting next to you on the bus during the day and checking your room at night. You'll barely be able to take a leak without being right behind you. In fact, I even took the liberty...” (continue)(continue reading)

Richard Grieco - Michael Corben
Robin Bartlett - Patricia Grober

“- Daniel: Mr. Miyagi? Was Sato as good as you in karate?
- Miyagi: We had same teacher.
- Daniel: Your father?
- Miyagi: Hai.
- Daniel: But I thought your family's karate was only taught from father to son?
- Miyagi: Father make exception.
- Daniel: If you and Sato had fought, would your father have been the referee?
- Miyagi: Would've been no...” (continue)(continue reading)
Ralph Macchio - Daniel
Pat Morita - Miyagi

“You don't know a thing about writing. You're a Goddamn schoolteacher.”
Chevy Chase - Andy Farmer

“- Ferris: You sort of want me, don't you?
- Gary: Ferris, maybe I do, but that's not the point. You see, to you, sex is poetry and phrases and everything you learned in books. You know, but when you're really in love...
- Ferris: I am!
- Gary: Ferris, I'm not a prince. I'm a teacher. You know, in a year you're gonna look at me and you're gonna...” (continue)(continue reading)
Tatum O'Neal - Ferris
Armand Assante - Gary

“What is going on? Mr. Pottery class... nice to meet ya.”
Gia Carides - Nikki

- Carla Tate: [quoting one of her teachers] Yeah, and she also told me that people like us, they - boys can try to take advantage and that they'll try to coitus us. So if that should ever happen, to say, "No!"
- Elizabeth: Oh. Okay.
- Carla Tate: "Stop right there!"
- Elizabeth: Good. That's excellent advice. What else did she say to you?
-... (continue)(continue reading)
Juliette Lewis - Carla
Diane Keaton - Elizabeth

“- Prof. Kenneth Monnitoff: I'm not going to be able to continue this conversation.
- Donnie Darko: Why?
- Prof. Kenneth Monnitoff: I could lose my job.”

Noah Wyle - Prof. Kenneth Monnitoff
Jake Gyllenhaal - Donnie Darko

“- Victor Lin: What's the hold-up?
- Official: He says Senzo Tanaka is his shidoshi.
- Victor Lin: What's the difference if Bruce Springsteen is his shidoshi?”
Ken Siu - Victor Lin

“No such thing as bad student, only bad teacher. Teacher say, student do.”
Pat Morita - Miyagi

“I feel sorry for Mr. McAllister. I mean, anyone who's stuck in the same little room, wearing the same stupid clothes, saying the exact same things year after year for his whole life, while his students go on to good colleges, move to big cities and do great things and make loads of money... He's got to be at least a little jealous.”
Reese Witherspoon - Tracy Flick