Hugh Grant movie quotes

“- David: Who's she marrying?
- Charles: Some total penis.
- David: What is it about penises that they get such great wives?”

David Bower - David - Wedding One
Hugh Grant - Charles - Wedding One

“- Truman: Are you alright, Man?
- Samuel Faulkner: Yes, I'm fine. I was just listening to what you were saying. Um, could you repeat it so I could get it down?
- Truman: You're an asshole, and my dad's a bastard!”
Joey Simmrin - Truman
Hugh Grant - Samuel Faulkner

“I'll tell you one thing. Men are bastards. After about ten minutes I wanted to cut my own penis off with a kitchen knife.”
Hugh Grant - Will Freeman

“- Anna Scott: What is it about men and nudity? Particularly breasts? How can you be so interested in them?
- William Thacker: Well...
- Anna Scott: But, but, seriously: they're just breasts. Every second person in the world has them.”
Julia Roberts - Anna Scott
Hugh Grant - William Thacker

“- Charles: Let me ask you one thing. Do you think - after we've dried off, after we've spent lots more time together - you might agree not to marry me? And do you think not being married to me might maybe be something you could consider doing for the rest of your life?
- Carrie: I do.”
Hugh Grant - Charles - Wedding One
Andie MacDowell - Carrie - Wedding One

“I am an island. I am bloody Ibiza!”
Hugh Grant - Will Freeman

“- Elinor Dashwood: You will inherit your fortune. We cannot even earn ours.
- Edward Ferrars: Perhaps Margaret is right.
- Elinor Dashwood: Right?
- Edward Ferrars: Piracy is our only option.”
Emma Thompson - Elinor Dashwood
Hugh Grant - Edward Ferrars

“- Christine: You will end up childless and alone.
- Will Freeman: Well, fingers crossed, yeah.”
Sharon Small - Christine
Hugh Grant - Will Freeman

“When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge - they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I've got a sneaky feeling you'll find that love actually is all around.”
Hugh Grant - The Prime Minister

“My life is made up of units of time. Buying CDs - two units. Eating lunch - three units. Exercising - two units. All in all, I had a very full life. It's just that it didn't mean anything.”
Hugh Grant - Will Freeman

“- William Thacker: Any horses in that one? Or hounds for that matter; our readers are intrigued by both species.
- Anna Scott: It takes place on a submarine.”

Hugh Grant - William Thacker
Julia Roberts - Anna Scott

“- Dr. Kosevich: You want Anastasia? Drugs, yes? Okay, valium.
- Samuel Faulkner: Valium is no good for her.
- Dr. Kosevich: No, for me.”

Robin Williams - Dr. Kosevich
Hugh Grant - Samuel Faulkner

“- Elinor Dashwood: Margaret has always wanted to travel.
- Edward Ferrars: I know. She's, eh, heading an expedition to China shortly. I am to go as her servant, but only on the understanding that I am to be very badly treated.”
Emma Thompson - Elinor Dashwood
Hugh Grant - Edward Ferrars

“- Charles: Basically you're saying marriage is just a way of getting out of an embarrassing pause in conversation.
- Gareth: The definitive icebreaker.”
Hugh Grant - Charles - Wedding One
Simon Callow - Gareth - Wedding One

“- Fiona Brewer: Will, am I a bad mother?
- Will Freeman: No. No, you're not a bad mother. You're just a barking lunatic.”
Toni Collette - Fiona Brewer
Hugh Grant - Will Freeman

“- Edward Ferrars: Your friendship has been the most important of my life.
- Elinor Dashwood: You will always have it.”
Hugh Grant - Edward Ferrars
Emma Thompson - Elinor Dashwood

“I own the hotel, and I live there. My life is very much like Monopoly.”
Hugh Grant - George Wade

“- Jimmy, Gina's Doorman: She came back, all right, crying her eyes out. She packed a bag, ran straight back out again. What the hell you been doing to her?
- Michael Felgate: I asked her to marry me.”

Joseph R. Gannascoli - Jimmy, Gina's Doorman
Hugh Grant - Michael Felgate

“Now these are very silly little boots, Jones. And this is a very silly little dress. And, um, these are, fuck me, absolutely enormous panties.”
Hugh Grant - Daniel Cleaver

“All I want - all I have ever wanted - is the quiet of a private life, but, eh, my mother is determined to see me distinguished.”
Hugh Grant - Edward Ferrars

“- Truman: My dad's an asshole.
- Samuel Faulkner: Okay. Good. Um, is that something you can maybe elaborate on for me a little?
- Truman: Okay. My dad's a giant asshole.”
Joey Simmrin - Truman
Hugh Grant - Samuel Faulkner

“- William Thacker: I enjoyed the movie very much. I was just wondering, did you ever consider having more horses in it?
- Anna Scott: Well, we would have liked to. But it was difficult, obviously, being set in space.”
Hugh Grant - William Thacker
Julia Roberts - Anna Scott

“- Michael Felgate: This is probably a stupid question, but is this going to hurt?
- Frank Vitale: No. You won't feel a thing.”

Hugh Grant - Michael Felgate
James Caan - Frank Vitale

“- George Wade: If you have to go, just... go!
- Lucy Kelson: What? What am I, five years old? This is my car!
- George Wade: It's only a Volvo.”

Hugh Grant - George Wade
Sandra Bullock - Lucy Kelson

“I love that word 'relationship'. Covers all manner of sins, doesn't it?”
Hugh Grant - The Prime Minister