Jim Belushi movie quotes

“- Howard Langston: I gotta tell you, Santa, there's something about this place that doesn't seem quite... Kosher.
- Mall Santa: Kosher? This coming from a guy who assaulted a toddler for a super ball?”
Arnold Schwarzenegger - Howard Langston
Jim Belushi - Mall Santa

“- Brannigan: You think you got problems? I gotta to take my wife and kids on vacation. I've got a plane to catch in 3 hours.
- Dooley: Plane? You said plane?
- Brannigan: But I ain't gonna catch the plane because I gotta wait here for the SWAT team.
- Dooley: Can I have the dog if I get you on the plane? You're airborne, you're airborne!
-...” (continue)(continue reading)
Ed O'Neill - Brannigan
Jim Belushi - Dooley

“- Rick Latimer: I'll be here tomorrow.
- Jake Phillips: I'll be here too.
- Rick Latimer: We are very stupid men.
- Jake Phillips: Yeah, I know. But what can you do?”
Jim Belushi - Rick Latimer
Louis Gossett Jr. - Jake Phillips

- Doctor Rock: What does it say?
- Richard Boyle: "Fuck you" in Italian. Shit, she's gone back to Italy to her parents. Goddamnit!
- Doctor Rock: That's too bad, Richard. But at least she left the TV.

Jim Belushi - Dr. Rock
James Woods - Richard Boyle

“Destiny's a pretty big concept, when you think about it. Where you are in life, how you got there, what would have happened if one thing or another had been different. To be honest, I never gave it much thought, myself, until today, June 14th, my 35th birthday, and without a doubt, the strangest day of my life. Do you remember the old story that...” (continue)(continue reading)
Jim Belushi - Larry Burrows

“- Salvatore Buonarte: Let him fall.
- Danny Muldoon: To the ground?
- Salvatore Buonarte: Yeah!
- Danny Muldoon: A fall like that could kill a guy!
- Salvatore Buonarte: He's dead for Chrissake! He's not gonna mind!”

Jim Belushi - Salvatore Buonarte
John Candy - Danny Muldoon

“- Brannigan: There he is, the best nose on the force. He could stick that snout in the wind right now and lead you to a stash in the middle of Tijuana.
- Dooley: Listen, I gotta be up front with you. I got a real bad feeling about this dog.
- Brannigan: Hey, tough shit. That's all I got. Not I want you to take care.
- Dooley: Don't worry about...” (continue)(continue reading)
Ed O'Neill - Brannigan
Jim Belushi - Dooley

“- Lyman: Dooley, what is it about me that makes you so passionate?
- Dooley: Well, it's not your looks, Lyman. I guess it's your job.
- Lyman: And knowing your methods of law enforcement, I don't suppose that you have a search warrant?
- Dooley: Dog ate it. You can hang around his tail for an hour.”
Kevin Tighe - Lyman
Jim Belushi - Dooley

“Why is it when you do something terrific, nine times out of ten you're all alone, but when you screw up really big, the whole world is watching?”
Jim Belushi - Larry Burrows

“All morning I'd been thinking about what it would have been like if my life had turned out differently.”
Jim Belushi - Larry Burrows

“Bob, c'mon, I know what you're thinking, I know how you're feeling, I know what's going through your mind, Bob. He's got her in all different kinds of positions, she's telling him about your sexual inadequacies, they're laughing their heads off about it... aw, he's chasing your wife, through your house, with your shorts on his head... I know,...” (continue)(continue reading)
Jim Belushi - Nick Pirandello

“- Nick Pirandello: You've got a sense of humor Bob... I like that in a man.
- Bob Wilson: What do you like in a woman?
- Nick Pirandello: Big tits.”
Jim Belushi - Nick Pirandello
John Ritter - Bob Wilson

“- Rick Latimer: I want a full-school assembly during sixth period, today.
- 1st Teacher: Are you mad? Do you know what could happen?
- 2nd Teacher: Why are you doing this?
- Rick Latimer: I like the attention.”

Jim Belushi - Rick Latimer

“- Howard Langston: You guys are nothing but a bunch of sleazy conmen in red suits.
- Mall Santa: What did you call us?
- Howard Langston: You heard me right. Conmen. Thieves. Degenerates. Low-lifes. Thugs. Criminals!
- Mall Santa: At the North Pole, them are fightin' words, partner.”
Arnold Schwarzenegger - Howard Langston
Jim Belushi - Mall Santa

“Best thing about Latin women is they don't speak English.”
Jim Belushi - Dr. Rock

“- Art Ridzik: About this pile-of-shit pimp in here. In this country, we try to protect the rights of individuals. It's called the Miranda Act, and it says that you can't even touch his ass.
- Ivan Danko: I do not want to touch his ass. I want to make him talk!”

Jim Belushi - Art Ridzik
Arnold Schwarzenegger - Ivan Danko

“- Victor Duncan: If you're trying to reach me, I'll just cut your hand off.
- Rick Latimer: I've got another one.”
Michael Wright - Victor Duncan
Jim Belushi - Rick Latimer

“The only difference between a witness and a liar is this: one knows what he's doing at all times; the other has no clue.”
Jim Belushi - Det. Frank Divinci

“- Doctor Rock: They kill people here, Boyle!
- Richard Boyle: Do you believe everything you read in the papers?
- Doctor Rock: Yeah I do!
- Richard Boyle: Come on man, you're gonna love it here.”

Jim Belushi - Dr. Rock
James Woods - Richard Boyle

“- Bob Wilson: I didn't know you smoked.
- Nick Pirandello: Just after sex, Bob. I'm trying to give it up.
- Bob Wilson: Well, at least you don't smoke that much.
- Nick Pirandello: About a pack a day.”
John Ritter - Bob Wilson
Jim Belushi - Nick Pirandello

“I'm gonna get us something from all four food groups: hamburgers, french fries, coffee and doughnuts.”
Jim Belushi - Art Ridzik

“- Nick Pirandello: We have been negotiating with men in UFOs for seven years. If we don't get to Washington by Friday, the whole deal will be off.
- Bob Wilson: Drive me home.
- Nick Pirandello: Bob, you said you were willing to listen!
- Bob Wilson: Negotiating with UFOs?
- Nick Pirandello: Yes! Space men ! Men from outer space! Alien beings!...” (continue)(continue reading)
Jim Belushi - Nick Pirandello
John Ritter - Bob Wilson

“- Jewel Bentley: That was the best safe sex I've ever had!
- Jimmy Dworski: That was the best sex I've had in 2 years, 11 months, 3 weeks and 5 days!”
Loryn Locklin - Jewel
Jim Belushi - Jimmy

“- Larry Burrows: Thanks. Thanks for everything. The good and the bad. Boy, you sure do know how to make a point. Oh, and listen, Mike - whatever you've got planned for the rest of my life? It's perfect.
- Mike: Happy birthday, Larry.”
Jim Belushi - Larry Burrows
Sir Michael Caine - Mike

“- Larry Burrows: How can my life change so much just because I hit one stinking baseball?
- Mike: Well, you see Larry, one's destiny is a very complicated thing. Every incident in a person's life affects everything else that follows it.”
Jim Belushi - Larry Burrows
Sir Michael Caine - Mike