Kathleen Turner movie quotes

- Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr: There it is, darling. Your new home. The House of Hfuhruhurr.
- Dolores: What are those assholes doing on the porch?
- Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr: Those aren't assholes. It's pronounced "azaleas".

Steve Martin - Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr
Kathleen Turner - Dolores Benedict

“- Oliver Rose: I think you owe me a solid reason. I worked my ass off for you and the kids to have a nice life and you owe me a reason that makes sense. I want to hear it.
- Barbara Rose: Because. When I watch you eat. When I see you asleep. When I look at you lately, I just want to smash your face in.”
Michael Douglas - Oliver Rose
Kathleen Turner - Barbara Rose

“- Dottie Hinkle: Hello?
- Beverly R. Sutphin: Is this the Cocksucker residence?
- Dottie Hinkle: God damn you! Stop calling here!
- Beverly R. Sutphin: Is this Four Two One Five Pussy Way?
- Dottie Hinkle: You bitch!
- Beverly R. Sutphin: Now let me check the zipcode. Two-one-two-fuck-you?”

Mink Stole - Dottie Hinkle
Kathleen Turner - Beverly R. Sutphin

“Never underestimate a man's ability to underestimate a woman.”
Kathleen Turner - Vic

“- Alberta Russell: Lucy, it's interesting how you always wear black and deny yourself food.
- Lucy Trager: It's not that interesting, really.”
Kathleen Turner - Alberta Russell
Gwyneth Paltrow - Lucy Trager

“- Richard Norvik: I have this theory that time is like a burrito. A burrito is this mexican food that I had when my parents took me to Disneyland.
- Peggy Sue: I know what a burrito is.”
Barry Miller - Richard Norvik
Kathleen Turner - Peggy Sue

“- Beverly R. Sutphin: I hate Mrs. Ackerman.
- Gus: I hate her too.
- Sloppy: I hate her guts. You know, somebody ought to kill her.
- Gus: Yeah, give her a happy face, and then recycle her.
- Beverly R. Sutphin: For the sake of this planet, someone just might.”
Kathleen Turner - Beverly R. Sutphin
Bus Howard - Gus
Alan J. Wendl - Sloppy

“How much romance can one woman take?”
Kathleen Turner - Joan

“When in doubt, hesitate!”
Kathleen Turner - Vic

“- Peggy Sue: We got married too young and ended up blaming each other for all the things we missed.
- Carol Heath: So, he started having affairs and you started getting depressed.”
Kathleen Turner - Peggy Sue
Catherine Hicks - Carol Heath

“- Jane Blue: I can't leave you alone for a minute.
- Jeff Blue: This wasn't my fault.
- Jane Blue: Nothing's ever your fault. You gonna kill him?
- Jeff Blue: Aren't we bloodthirsty today? I told you not to drink all that coffee.”

Kathleen Turner - Jane Blue
Dennis Quaid - Jeff Blue

- Chip: Mom, are you a serial killer?
- Beverly R. Sutphin: The only "serial" I know anything about is Rice Krispies.
Matthew Lillard - Chip
Kathleen Turner - Beverly R. Sutphin

“- Joan: You have no right to keep me here against my will!
- Omar: Then go. You're free to leave. Should you leave, I will not stop you... but I will not provide transportation to any airport, train station or port for you. Besides, only the worst kind of fool will attempt to cross our desert alone.”
Kathleen Turner - Joan
Spiros Focás - Omar

“Women are responsible for creating their own roles.”
Kathleen Turner

“- Ned: I need someone to take care of me, someone to rub my tired muscles, smooth out my sheets.
- Matty: Get married.
- Ned: I just need it for tonight.”
William Hurt - Ned Racine
Kathleen Turner - Matty Walker

“- Peggy Sue: I think I had a heart attack and died at the reunion!
- Richard Norvik: Well, you look great for a corpse.”
Kathleen Turner - Peggy Sue
Barry Miller - Richard Norvik

“- Lloyd Christmas: Cheers!
- Fraida: Whoa! Wait. Where'd you get that?
- Lloyd Christmas: The Slurpee machine in the back.
- Fraida: That's embalming fluid.
- Lloyd Christmas: Oh. Does it have aspartame?
- Fraida: No.
- Lloyd Christmas: Cool.”
Jim Carrey - Lloyd Christmas
Kathleen Turner - Fraida

“I get so excited when you get angry. It makes me feel so much closer to the reading of the will.”

Kathleen Turner - Dolores Benedict

“- Ned: You can stand here with me if you want but you'll have to agree not to talk about the heat.
- Matty: I'm a married woman.
- Ned: Meaning what?
- Matty: Meaning I'm not looking for company.
- Ned: Then you should have said I'm a happily married woman.”
William Hurt - Ned Racine
Kathleen Turner - Matty Walker

“- Matty: Would you get me a paper towel or something? Dip it in some cold water.
- Ned: Right away. I'll even wipe if off for you.
- Matty: You don't want to lick it?”
Kathleen Turner - Matty Walker
William Hurt - Ned Racine

“- Irene Walker: I can't get over it. What kinda creep wouldn't catch a baby? If it was real it coulda been crippled for life.
- Charley Partanna: He wasn't paid to bodyguard the baby.”

Kathleen Turner - Irene Walker
Jack Nicholson - Charley Partanna

“- Jessica Rabbit: You don't know how hard it is being a woman looking the way I do.
- Eddie Valiant: You don't know how hard it is being a man looking at a woman looking the way you do.
- Jessica Rabbit: I'm not bad. I'm just drawn that way.”
Kathleen Turner - Jessica Rabbit
Bob Hoskins - Eddie Valiant

“- Joan Wilder: I need to get to Cartagena.
- Jack T. Colton: Cartagena? Angel, you are hell and gone from Cartagena. Cartagena's over there on the coast.
- Joan Wilder: But they told me this bus.
- Jack T. Colton: Who told you that? Who told you this bus was going to Cartagena?
- Joan Wilder: That man...
- Jack T. Colton: That nice man who...” (continue)(continue reading)
Kathleen Turner - Joan Wilder
Michael Douglas - Jack T. Colton

“Some men, once they get a whiff of it, they trail you like a hound.”
Kathleen Turner - Matty Walker

“- Peggy Sue: Grandpa, if you had a chance to go back and do it all differently, what would you have changed?
- Barney Alvorg: Well, I would have taken better care of my teeth.”
Kathleen Turner - Peggy Sue
Leon Ames - Barney Alvorg