Apparel quotes

“You've got the wrong Versace.”

“- Carolyn: Your costume is pretty.
- Buddy: It's not a costume. I'm an elf. Well, technically, I'm a human, but I was raised by elves.
- Carolyn: I'm a human... raised by humans.”
Lydia Lawson-Baird - Carolyn
Will Ferrell - Buddy

“She wasn't wearing a bra. Did you see that? Did you see the way they bounce?”

Joseph Bologna - Joey

“- Jo Dee Fostar: You know, you look better in pictures.
- Det. Martin Balsam: You should see me in a bikini.”
Billy Zane - Jo Dee Fostar
Martin Balsam - Det. Martin Balsam

“- Margaret White: I can see your dirty pillows. Everyone will.
- Carietta 'Carrie' White: They're called breasts, Momma. All the girls have them. They're very fashionable these days.”
Patricia Clarkson - Margaret White
Angela Bettis - Carietta 'Carrie' White

“- Putnam: All right, I'm looking for a couple of kids. This one's a mental case, have you seen them?
- Pinball Teen: Does he dress like you?
- Putnam: No.
- Pinball Teen: Then he can't be too much of a case, all right?”
Will Seltzer - Putnam
Tom Kerley - Pinball Teen

“Your, clothes, your hair. They might say 1968, but your attitude is pure 1920.”
Sharon Stone - Miriam Ebbers

“- Phil: You're not really wearing that are you?
- Alan: Wearing what?
- Phil: The man purse. You actually gonna wear that or are you guys just fuckin' with me?
- Alan: It's where I keep all my things. Get a lot of compliments on this. Plus it's not a purse, it's called a satchel. Indiana Jones wears one.”
Bradley Cooper - Phil
Zach Galifianakis - Alan

“- Kid: You are really Santa, right?
- Willie: No, I'm an accountant. I wear this fucking thing as a fashion statement, alright?”
Brett Kelly - Kid
Billy Bob Thornton - Willie

“- Renfield: I think they're from the government.
- Dracula: How do you know?
- Renfield: They're wearing shoes.”
Arte Johnson - Renfield
George Hamilton - Dracula

“- Kate Welles: You're wearing sunglasses!
- Joey Santino: They're subscription!
- Kate Welles: It's prescription, you idiot!”
Famke Janssen - Kate Welles
Josh Hopkins - Joey Santino

“- Pastor Arthur Mitchell: Actually, your honor, we have a lot of witnesses here that are willing to testify to a lot of things... like embezzlement.
- Tianna: Misappropriation of funds.
- Sister Doris: Falsifying documents.
- Rickey: Not to mention, wearing an easter suit with a Halloween shirt and tie set!”
Chi McBride - Pastor Arthur Mitchell
Malinda Williams - Tianna
Loretta Devine - Sister Doris
Katt Williams - Rickey

“You look like the Fourth of July! Makes me want a hot dog real bad!”
Jennifer Coolidge - Paulette

“- Marv Gomez: Where you goin'?
- Ken: Home.
- Marv Gomez: The night's just beginning!
- Ken: For you maybe, but...
- Marv Gomez: Nothin' happening? That used to be my problem, before I started wearing leather.”
Chick Vennera - Marv Gomez
John Friedrich - Ken

- Fiona: Where are your skates? They're part of the uniform.
- Rhonda: Fiona, if I wanted to look like a clown I'd join the circus.
- Fiona: If you were part of my circus I'd have you wiping the elephant butts with a "wet one”.
Jennifer Coolidge - Fiona
Regina King - Rhonda

“If Jesus had a nice pair of shoes and a good haircut, he'd never been crucified.”
Aaron Ruell - Judas - Real

“Scarlotta! Fabulous dress. The ecclesiastical purple and the pagan orange symbolizing the mystical symbiosis in marriage between the heathen and Christian traditions?”

Simon Callow - Gareth - Wedding One

“I don't care what undercover rock you crawled out from, there's a dress code for detectives in Robbery-Homicide. Section 3-605. 10. 20. 22. 24. 26. 50. 70. 80. It specifies: clean shirt, short hair, tie, pressed trousers, sports jacket or suit, and leather shoes, preferably with a high shine on them.”

Dan Aykroyd - Friday

“- Martin: Jesus Christ! Look at this - my sneaker's ruined!
- Erica: They're only thirty-five dollars.”

Michael Murphy - Martin
Jill Clayburgh - Erica

“- Roland Sharp: You're not really the cheerleading type, are you?
- Heather: For me, it's more penance than a passion. Religious ascetics wear a hair shirt, I carry the pom-poms.”
Tommy Lee Jones - Roland Sharp
Vanessa Ferlito - Heather

“You're more than the shoes on your feet or the designer dress on your back. You're more than the purse you carry or the money inside. You and I are more than the stuff, more than the things in our lives. Somewhere between our things and our stuff is us. I don't wanna lose us.”

Martin Sheen - Jack

“Sweety, no double earrings. You're a state cheerleader, not a state hooker!”
Bree Turner - Tina

“You're not a hero, you're just a little girl playing dress up.”

Sharon Stone - Laurel Hedare

- Professor Eggstrum: Dallas, when a person doesn't have less on, they have...?
- Dallas: "More on"?
- Professor Eggstrum: Exactly.
George Furth - Professor Eggstrum
Michael Beck - Dallas

“You're wearing the uniform of the depressed: sweatpants and a raincoat.”

Luke Wilson - Andy