Cooking quotes

“- Latrine: Raven's egg! Blood of a hen! A little more blood, yes! Eyeballs of a crocodile! Testicles of a newt! I bet he's a transsexual now! Robin of Loxley is handsome and brave. He seeks to regain his family's honor. Little sod could be trouble.
- Prince John: Are you certain?
- Latrine: Certain? You want certain, hire yourself a witch! Me,...” (continue)(continue reading)

Tracey Ullman - Latrine
Richard Lewis - Prince John

“- Lucky Day: Dusty, how do you like your bat?
- Dusty Bottoms: Medium rare.”

Steve Martin - Lucky Day
Chevy Chase - Dusty Bottoms

“- Mary Fiore: That's your specialty? Instant macaroni and cheese.
- Massimo: Sì, it is a low-budget wonder. Already today, I've eaten three boxes.”
Jennifer Lopez - Mary Fiore
Justin Chambers - Massimo

“I'm not an amazing cook. But I can follow a recipe!”
Rachel McAdams

“- Chef: I was supposed to go to Paris, study at the Escoffier School. That's when I got my orders. Well, I joined the Navy. Heard they had better food. Cook school, that did it.
- Willard: Oh yeah? How's that?
- Chef: They lined us up in front of a hundred yards of prime rib. All of us, you know, lined up and looking at it. Magnificent meat!...” (continue)(continue reading)
Frederic Forrest - Jay 'Chef' Hicks
Martin Sheen - Captain Benjamin L. Willard

“Here I am, slaving a way over a hot stove, making cookies... making Swedish meatballs, and for what? A man who doesn't appreciate me! For a man that can't even wash one fucking dish! For a man who isn't even a man at all where it counts, if you get my drift!”
Jennifer Tilly - Tiffany

“- Waiter at Waldorf Astoria: How would you like your steaks cooked?
- Pepper Lewis: Oh, just knock its horns off, wipe its nasty ass, and chunk it right here on this plate.”
Christopher Durang - Waiter at Waldorf Astoria
Woody Harrelson - Pepper Lewis

“Bread has existed in some form for over 12,000 years, especially amongst the poor. Flour and water. What could be simpler? Even today, grain represents 65% of all agriculture. Fruits and vegetables only 6%. Ancient Greek peasants dipped their stale, measly bread in wine for breakfast. And how did Jesus teach us to pray if not to beg for our...” (continue)(continue reading)
Ralph Fiennes - Chef Slowik

“Big-I remember when you kept your sweaters in the stove.
Carrie-I remember when your hair was black. ”
Sarah Jessica Parker - Carrie Bradshaw
Chris Noth - Mr. Big

“Do you know what I dream about when I dream about Thanksgiving, which is a lot? I dream that I eat so much deliciousness that all the blood rushes to my stomach and I pass out right at the table. ”
Adam Brody - Seth Cohen

“Valka-I'm, uh... a little out of practice.
Stoick the Vast-Well, you know - I didn't marry you for your cooking.
Gobber-I hope not. Her meatballs could kill more beasts than a battle ax.”

Cate Blanchett - Valka
Gerard Butler - Stoick
Craig Ferguson - Gobber

“Bonjour, mesdames et monsiuers. Yesterday we have learned the correct way how to boil water. Today we will learn the correct way how to crack an egg. Voilà! An egg. Now, an egg is not a stone; it is not made of wood, it is a living thing. It has a heart. So when we crack it, we must not torment it. We must be merciful and execute it quickly,...” (continue)(continue reading)
Marcel Hillaire - The Professor

“A woman happily in love, she burns the soufflé. A woman unhappily in love, she forgets to turn on the oven.”
Marcel Dalio - Baron St. Fontanel

“- Jeff: Would you fix me a sandwich, please?
- Stella: Yes, I will. And I'll spread a little common sense on the bread.”
James Stewart - L.B. 'Jeff' Jefferies
Thelma Ritter - Stella

“From now on the essence of this hotel will be speed. If a customer askes you for a three-minute egg, give it to him in two minutes. If he askes you for a two-minute egg, give it to him in one minute. If he askes you for a one-minute egg, give him the chicken and let him work it out for himself!”
Groucho Marx - Kornblow

“- David: To get even one Michelin star, you have to be like Luke Skywalker. Okay? To get two, you have to be... whoever Alec Guinness was. But if you manage to get three... you're Yoda.
- Sara: Well, what if he's Darth Vader?”
Sam Keeley - David
Lily James - Sara

“Do you like your chili with or without crushed Oreos?”
Mel Gibson - Martin Riggs

“I'm an incest survivor, you know? I haven't remembered the incident yet but I know it's there somewhere. I just have to sense that I survived something. All my therapists think so. Oh, God, a kitchen. I hate kitchens... cooking, cleaning, anything feminine! It's my mother's fault.”

Jessica Lundy - Talkative Applicant

“I got the recipe from a magazine. The mail got wet in the rain, so some of the pages ran together, but what I couldn't read I just... improvised with my own little... creative ideas. It's got raisins in it. You like raisins.”

Kim Darby - Jenny Myer

“- Marlene: Ray, what did I tell you about cooking in the dark? Are you trying to burn the house down?
- Ray Charles: Think about it, Marlene, what do I need the light for?
- Marlene: Well, you don't need to be cooking anyway. We brought you take out from Oscar's.
- Ray Charles: Well, get your money back. I got fried chicken right here.”
Denise Dowse - Marlene
Jamie Foxx - Ray Charles

“- Roger Murtaugh (Lethal Weapon): Remarks like that will not get you invited to Christmas dinner.
- Martin Riggs (Lethal Weapon): My luck's changing for the better every day.”

Danny Glover - Roger Murtaugh
Mel Gibson - Martin Riggs

“If you try to start a new restaurant, there are at least a dozen people who will try to have you killed.”
Daniel Brühl - Tony

“- Lily: You're the ogre.
- Adam Jones: Yes. But I bake great cakes.”
Lexie Benbow-Hart - Lily
Bradley Cooper - Adam Jones

“- Charlotte: That was the worst lunch.
- Bob Harris: So bad. What kind of restaurant makes you cook your own food?”
Scarlett Johansson - Charlotte
Bill Murray - Bob Harris

“They had to replace my metal plate with a plastic one. Every time Catherine would rev up the microwave, I'd piss my pants and forget who I was for about half an hour.”

Randy Quaid - Cousin Eddie