Meeting quotes

“- Max Abbitt: I thought we agreed not to set each other up anymore.
- Jay Murphy: No, I agreed not to let you set me up anymore after that girl who you said was perfect for me tied me up and came out with that hood and cane and offered to beat the shit out of me.”
David Schwimmer - Max Abbitt
Jason Lee - Jay Murphy

“[talking about Chloe]
- Clark Kent: It's like you find out this secret and it colors everything. I just can't believe I never saw it before.
- Lana Lang: Sometimes the right person can be right in front of your eyes and you never even know it.”

Tom Welling - Clark Kent
Kristin Kreuk - Lana Lang

I knew Nirvana was straight around the corner. I turned the corner and ran smack into Betty Crocker! She was running across the sky yelling "You never outgrow your need for milk!". I looked at her, and I said: "Baby... you're something else!". Far out, man!
Michael Barrere - Hip Kid

“- Kitty Packard: Once in our life we get asked to a classy house and I got a new dress that will knock their eye out and we're going!
- Dan Packard: We're not going!”
Jean Harlow - Kitty Packard
Wallace Beery - Dan Packard

“- Lori Craven: Hi. I'm Lori Craven and... I'm an actress.
- Betsy Faye Sharon: An actress! Really! How nice for you! I'm Betsy Faye Sharon and I'm a bitch. Now get out of here.”
Elisabeth Shue - Lori Craven
Carrie Fisher - Betsy Faye Sharon

“- President Russell P. Kramer: When you were in the White House, who was the person you were most excited to meet?
- President Matt Douglas: Nelson Mandela.
- President Russell P. Kramer: I'm not a reporter.
- President Matt Douglas: Ella Fitzgerald.
- President Russell P. Kramer: Ah.
- President Matt Douglas: Mandela was a great man, but he...” (continue)(continue reading)
Jack Lemmon - President Russell P. Kramer
James Garner - President Matt Douglas

“- Dil: Ask to meet me again, Jimmy.
- Fergus: Do you think that's wise?
- Dil: Nothing's wise.”
Jaye Davidson - Dil
Stephen Rea - Fergus

“- Flash Gordon: This Ming is a psycho!
- Ming's Floating Servant: This Ming is a psycho.
- Klytus: Who said that?
- Ming's Floating Servant: The fair-haired prisoner.
- Klytus: Who are you?
- Flash Gordon: Flash Gordon. Quarterback. New York Jets.”
Sam J. Jones - Flash Gordon
Peter Wyngarde - Klytus

“- Queen Constantina: Chris you've been up all night. Come have something to eat.
- Prince Christopher: I can't. I can't eat or rest until I've found her again.”
Whoopi Goldberg - Queen Constantina
Paolo Montalban - Prince Christopher

“- Mrs. Gloria Teasdale: I want to present to you Ambassador Trentino of Sylvania. Having him with us today is indeed a great pleasure.
- Ambassador Trentino: Thank you, but I can't stay very long.
- Rufus T. Firefly: That's even a greater pleasure.”
Margaret Dumont - Mrs. Gloria Teasdale
Louis Calhern - Ambassador Trentino
Groucho Marx - Rufus T. Firefly

“- Juan Bramuglia: More bad news from Rome, she met with the Pope. She only got a rosary and a kindly word.
- Ché: I wouldn't say the Holy Father gave her the bird. But papal decorations, never a hope.”

Gary Brooker - Juan Bramuglia
Antonio Banderas - Ché

“I thought you might like to meet a friend. Or at least my boss's computer.”

Lenny von Dohlen - Miles Harding

“- Buzz: I am Buzz Lightyear; I come in peace.
- Rex: Oh, I'm so glad you're not a dinosaur!”

Tim Allen - Buzz Lightyear
Wallace Shawn - Rex

“- Mac MacIntyre: We have to talk to a Mr. Urquhart, an accountant. Can you tell me where we might find him?
- Gordon Urquhart: Indeed, yes. He has an office next door, to the left, on the first floor. I know for a fact that he'll be there in about 15 minutes.”
Peter Riegert - Mac
Denis Lawson - Urquhart

“- Morticia Addams: When we first met years ago, it was an evening much like this. Magic in the air. A boy.
- Gomez Addams: A girl.
- Morticia Addams: An open grave. It was my first funeral.
- Gomez Addams: You were so beautiful. Pale and mysterious. No one even looked at the corpse.”
Anjelica Huston - Morticia Addams
Raul Julia - Gomez Addams

“- Armand 'Flash' Carducci: Hi, girls. What's happening? My name's Flash, what's yours?
- Nancy: Don't talk to him, Cheryl, he's a dork.
- Armand 'Flash' Carducci: I'm not a dork, I'm Italian!”
John Mengatti - Armand 'Flash' Carducci
Tammy Taylor - Nancy

“- Don José Alvarez de Cordoba: It is extremely important that my niece is presented to the Queen before her new maids of honor are chosen.
- Capt. Lopez: They say that Elizabeth surrounds herself with beauty in the hope that it may be contagious.”
Claude Rains - Don José Alvarez de Cordoba
Gilbert Roland - Capt. Lopez

“- Chief Insp. Jacques Clouseau: We have not been properly introduced. You of course know who I am.
- Sergeant Clifton Sleigh: Sergeant Sleigh.
- Chief Insp. Jacques Clouseau: No, I am not Sergeant Sleigh.
- Sergeant Clifton Sleigh: No, I am Sergeant Sleigh.
- Chief Insp. Jacques Clouseau: Oh yes! Now we are getting somewhere.”
Sir Roger Moore - Clouseau
Ted Wass - Sergeant Clifton Sleigh

“- Debra Salhany: So, how did you meet your wife?
- Peter McGowan: She was a lap dancer, I had a pocket full of singles... No, she was a dancer. For a brief period, she gave acting a try. She came in for an audition, and the rest as they say is histrionics.
- Debra Salhany: So, you employed the casting couch?
- Peter McGowan: Hey, whatever works....” (continue)(continue reading)
Peri Gilpin - Debra Salhany
Sir Kenneth Branagh - Peter McGowan

“The road is my home, and my home, the road. And when I think of all the people I have come upon in my travels, I cannot help but think of the people who have come upon me.”
John Cameron Mitchell - Hedwig

“- Mae: The light that's leaving that star right now will take a billion years to get down here. You want to know why you've never met a girl like me before?
- Caleb Colton: Yeah. Why?
- Mae: Because I'll still be here when the light from that star gets down here to earth in a billion years.”

Jenny Wright - Mae
Adrian Pasdar - Caleb Colton

“- Charlotte: He's such a nerd!
- Kay: He's not a nerd! Where did you ever come up with that word?
- Charlotte: Just came out of my lips when I met him! Nerd! Just like that.”
Claire Trevor - Charlotte
Sally Field - Kay

“- Beulah Blanton: Zack I have found the perfect woman for you! She's the most beautiful woman in town and she's available.
- Zack Blanton: Women die.”
Debbie Reynolds - Beulah Blanton
Sean Patrick Flanery - Zack Blanton

“- Billy: Cherry, this is Pee Wee.
- Cherry Forever: I'll say. What do you use for a jockstrap, kid? A peanut shell and a rubber band?”
Mark Herrier - Billy
Susan Clark - Cherry Forever

“- Zaneeta Shinn: It's indecent to meet boys at the footbridge!
- Tommy Djilas: First thing after supper?
- Zaneeta Shinn: All right! Ye Gods!”
Susan Luckey - Zaneeta Shinn
Timmy Everett - Tommy Djilas