University quotes

“My old lady couldn't afford to send me to college. So I got a job. I was washing dishes, dumping trash... all that sort of shit.”
Eric Freeman - Ricky Caldwell

“- Judy Witwicky: Look at this place! I feel smarter already! Can you smell that?
- Ron Witwicky: Yeah, smells like $40,000 a year.”

Julie White - Judy Witwicky
Kevin Dunn - Ron Witwicky

“- Elder Son: If I'm not too unworthy, I hope to win a degree in agriculture.
- Liu - Grain Merchant: Degree? Agriculture?
- Wang: That's some kind of paper that will make it rain just enough, but not too much.”
Keye Luke - Elder Son
Olaf Hytten - Liu - Grain Merchant
Paul Muni - Wang

“- Lelaina Pierce: Quick, Vicky, whats your social security?
- Vickie Miner: Uhm... 851-25-9357.
- Troy Dyer: Very impressive.
- Vickie Miner: Thats the only thing I really learned in college.”
Winona Ryder - Lelaina Pierce
Janeane Garofalo - Vickie Miner
Ethan Hawke - Troy Dyer

“There is no fucking way on this planet, nor any other I would ever be in some fucking sorority.”
Amy Smart - Kayleigh

“Do you know, Bernadette, if you and the other so-called members of the top 10 would spend half the time on your books that you do down at that inn, you could all be in Harvard tomorrow?”
Frances Hyland - Mrs. Patterson

“- Gus Colyard: Fuck! How do you just wake up in a room and have no idea where you are?
- Xavier Chavez: I guess you've never been drunk before.
- Gus Colyard: I've been drunk. I spent 3 years in college.”
Tony Nappo - Gus Colyard
Franky G - Xavier Chavez

“- Frank Beardsley: William, what have you got there?
- William Beardsley: Academy applications, S.A.T. forms, Capital Summer Hill entry forms, and the number of the girl two houses down.
- Frank Beardsley: Outstanding!”
Dennis Quaid - Frank Beardsley
Sean Faris - William Beardsley

“- Jack O'Callahan: Why'd you wanna play college hockey?
- Ralph Cox: Isn't it obvious? For the girls.”
Michael Mantenuto - Jack O'Callahan

“Harmon College and their - their 100 years of tradition. But tradition of what? Of hazing kids and humiliating anyone who's a bit different? Of putting so much pressure on kids they turn into these - these stress freaks and caffeine addicts.”
Justin Long - Bartleby Gaines

“So this is a Harvard bar? I thought there'd be equations and shit on the wall.”
Ben Affleck - Chuckie Sullivan

“I flunk English, I'm outta here. Kiss college goodbye. I don't know what I'll do. Dad will be pissed off. Mom will be heartbroken. If I play my cards right, I get maybe a six-month grace period and then I gotta get a job, and you know what that means. That's right, they start me at the drive-up window and I gradually work my way up from shakes...” (continue)(continue reading)

John Cusack - Walter "Gib" Gibson

“What am I going to do with my life? You know I didn't think college was actually going to end.”
Michael McGlone - Patrick McMullen

“I'll forgive him when I go to college. That's when I'll forgive him. I can't go, can I? Because he took all the money out of my college fund, and bought Mexican black tar with it. And you're asking me to forgive this guy. No way.”

Shia LaBeouf - Kelly Ernswiler

“- Mrs. Marcus: Where did you get that funny accent? Are you from Harvard or something?
- J. Algernon Hawthorne: Harvard? Rather not. I'm English.
- Mrs. Marcus: Sounds so foreign.”
Ethel Merman - Mrs. Marcus

“With over 4,000 colleges in the US, I developed five reasons for choosing the perfect one for my little girl. Academics, distance from home, campus safety, distance from home, and last but not least, distance from home.”
Martin Lawrence - James

“- Morgan Hiller: You going to college?
- Frankie Croyden: I'll be lucky if I even graduate. I'll probably just get married, don't need college for that.”
James Spader - Morgan Hiller
Kim Richards - Frankie Croyden

“We're all going to go to college as virgins. They probably have special dorms for people like us.”
Jason Biggs - Jim Levenstein

“- Cameron Frye: I don't know what I'm gonna do.
- Sloane Peterson: College.
- Cameron Frye: Yeah, but to do what?
- Sloane Peterson: What are you interested in?
- Cameron Frye: Nothing.
- Sloane Peterson: Me neither!”
Matthew Broderick - Cameron Frye
Mia Sara - Sloane Peterson

“- James 'Droz' Andrews: Want some advice?
- Tom Lawrence: Well, yeah.
- James 'Droz' Andrews: Well, here's all you need to know. Classes: nothing before eleven. Beer: it's your best friend, you drink a lot. Women? You're a freshman, so it's pretty much out of the question.”
Jeremy Piven - James 'Droz' Andrews
Chris Young - Tom Lawrence

“- Gabriella Montez: You know, my mom and I have been talking about Stanford University pretty much since I was born.
- Troy Bolton: Hey, you're already in. That's so cool.
- Gabriella Montez: Except she won't stop talking about it. It's embarrassing.
- Troy Bolton: Come on. She's proud of you. I'm proud of you.”
Vanessa Hudgens - Gabriella Montez
Zac Efron - Troy Bolton

“- Silas P. Silas: This class is fucking boring I'm out of here.
- Dean Carl Cain: Uh, excuse me did I hear you say something?
- Silas P. Silas: With all do respect sir, suck my dick.”
Method Man - Silas P. Silas
Obba Babatundé - Dean Carl Cain

“- Carole Genest: You think if you went to college things would have turned out different with her?
- Jesse Stone: Probably not, but I would have gotten an education.
- Carole Genest: From her or from school?
- Jesse Stone: Both.”

Liisa Repo-Martell - Carole Genest
Tom Selleck - Jesse Stone

“- Jack Crawford: I remember you from my seminar at UVA. You grilled me pretty hard, as I recall, on the bureau's civil rights record in the Hoover years. I gave you an A.
- Clarice Starling: A-minus, Sir.”
Scott Glenn - Jack Crawford
Jodie Foster - Clarice Starling

“- Tom Fox: He doesn't have a passport.
- Carl Hanratty: For the last six months, he's gone to Harvard and Berkeley. I'm betting he can get a passport.”
Frank John Hughes - Tom Fox
Tom Hanks - Carl Hanratty