Charlie Sheen movie quotes

“I didn't come here because you're my father... I came here because you're the richest person I know!”

Charlie Sheen - David Ackerman

- Ramada Thompson: I'm recommending that you be grounded.
- Lt. Topper Harley: You've got to be joking!
- Ramada Thompson: Look, if I were joking, I would've said "what do you do with an elephant with three balls?".
[he shrugs, since he has no idea what the answer is]
- Ramada Thompson: "You walk him and pitch to the rhino".
- Lt. Topper Harley:... (continue)(continue reading)
Valeria Golino - Ramada Thompson
Charlie Sheen - Lt. Topper Harley

“- Blood: You're either the dumbest fucker I ever met in my life, or you got the balls of an elephant. Which is it?
- Dan Saxon: You pick.
- Blood: That's exactly what I'm going to do.”
Michael Madsen - Blood
Charlie Sheen - Daniel 'Dan' Saxon

“- Topper Harley: I'm putty in your hands.
- Michelle Rodham Huddleston: In my hands, nothing turns to putty.”
Charlie Sheen - Topper Harley
Brenda Bakke - Michelle Rodham Huddleston

- Rabinowitz: What are you reading?
- Topper Harley: "Great Expectations".
- Rabinowitz: Is it any good?
- Topper Harley: It's not what I'd hoped for.
Ryan Stiles - Rabinowitz
Charlie Sheen - Topper Harley

“For someone I've never slept with you sure fucked me pretty good.”

Charlie Sheen - Richard "Ditch" Brodie

“- Aramis: Only the wrong words are waste of time. The right words can make a more lasting impression than a thousand of Porthos's kisses.
- Barmaid: Not likely.”
Charlie Sheen - Aramis
Nichola Cordey - Barmaid

“- Char: Why do we always have to anlayze everthing? Can't you just trust that I love you?
- Zane Zaminski: Algorithms I trust. Boolean logic I trust. Beautiful women, they just... mystify me.”
Teri Polo - Char
Charlie Sheen - Zane Zaminsky

“I don't want to sound like a fag or nothing, but you are my best friend.”
Charlie Sheen - Bo Richards

“I'm not saying I don't trust you, and I'm not saying I do. But I don't.”

Charlie Sheen - Topper Harley

“- Bogus Charlie: Something else my grandfather told me. What a true apache had to do, when surrounded and out-numbered by crazy white men with guns.
- Dan Saxon: What's that?
- Bogus Charlie: Give the fuck up!”
Rino Thunder - Bogus Charlie
Charlie Sheen - Daniel 'Dan' Saxon

“- David Ackerman: You fucking lied to Garcia.
- Nick Pulovski: I didn't lie to him. I just didn't tell him the truth.”
Charlie Sheen - David Ackerman
Clint Eastwood - Nick Pulovski

“- D'Artagnan: The Cardinal! We have to hurry!
- Porthos: You two have a date?
- D'Artagnan: No. It's the Cardinal. He's conspiring against the king.
- Aramis: Tell us something we don't know.”
Chris O'Donnell - D'Artagnan
Oliver Platt - Porthos
Charlie Sheen - Aramis

“Those cigarettes aren't going to kill you, brother. I am.”
Charlie Sheen - Artie Mitchell

- Chris Morrow: Well, I was trained to swallow all sorts of things.
- Richard "Ditch" Brodie: Careful, I might just have to marry you.
Nastassja Kinski - Chris Morrow
Charlie Sheen - Richard "Ditch" Brodie

“- Louis Fedders: Are you sure you know what you're doing?
- Carl Taylor: C'mon, guys. I'm not gonna get in over my head.
- James St. James: Yeah, well that depends on which head you're talking about.”
Keith David - Louis Fedders
Charlie Sheen - Carl Taylor
Emilio Estevez - James St. James

“- Topper Harley: I'm no good at being noble, but... do you have any idea what would happen if you stay here with me?
- Ramada Rodham Hayman: Of course I do. Sex. Wild, free, passionate, unbridled sex. I would fondle you in ways you can't imagine. I would pleasure you at any time, in any place, in any way, for as long as you could possibly desire.”
Charlie Sheen - Topper Harley
Valeria Golino - Ramada Rodham Hayman

“- Sgt. Elias: First time?
- Chris: Yeah.
- Sgt. Elias: Then the worm has definitely turned for you, man. Feel good?
- Chris: Yeah, it feels good. I got no pain in my neck now.
- Sgt. Elias: Feeling good's good enough.”

Willem Dafoe - Sgt. Elias
Charlie Sheen - Chris

“- Jake: Courage isn't easy to come by. That's how he keeps those goons with him all the time. They're just scared.
- Keri Johnson: So am I.
- Jake: Keri, listen. There's gonna come a time when you'll have to take a stand. When you do that, that's when you'll free yourself of him. No sooner.”

Charlie Sheen - Jake Kesey
Sherilyn Fenn - Keri Johnson

“- Chris: He killed him. I know that he killed him. I saw his eyes when he came back in.
- Rhah: How do you know the dinks didn't get him? You've got no proof, man.
- Chris: Proof's in the eyes, man. When you know, you know.”
Charlie Sheen - Chris
Francesco Quinn - Rhah

“- Claire Varrens : What are we doing here?
- Lt. Dale Hawkins: Well hopefully each other if all goes as planned.”
Joanne Whalley - Claire Varrens
Charlie Sheen - Lt. Dale Hawkins

“- Char: Why'd they leave?
- Zane Zaminski: They didn't leave.
- Char: How do you know?
- Zane Zaminski: Because we aren't dead yet.”

Teri Polo - Char
Charlie Sheen - Zane Zaminsky

“- Sasha La Fleur: He's only 8 years old!
- Charlie Barkin: That's 56 in dog years.”

Sheena Easton - Sasha La Fleur
Charlie Sheen - Charlie Barkin

“- Bud Fox: If these people lose their jobs, they got nowhere to go! My father has worked there for 24 years! I gave him my word.
- Gordon Gekko: It's all about bucks, kid. The rest is conversation... Hey, Buddy, you're still gonna be president, all right? And when the time comes, you're gonna parachute out, a rich man. With the money you're...” (continue)(continue reading)
Charlie Sheen - Bud Fox
Michael Douglas - Gordon Gekko

“You have the whitest white-part-of-the-eyes I've ever seen. Do you floss?”
Charlie Sheen - Lt. Topper Harley