Danny DeVito movie quotes

“- Barbara Rose: Have you ever made angry love?
- Gavin D'Amato: Is there any other way?”
Kathleen Turner - Barbara Rose
Danny DeVito - Gavin D'Amato

“I didn't poison your dog, Norman. If you knew me better, you'd know it's not my style. I'd have shot him.”

Danny DeVito - John Leary

“- Carol: Aren't you scared?
- Sam Stone: Scared? Hell, no. I'm looking forward to it. My only regret, Carol, is that the plan isn't more violent.”

Anita Morris - Carol
Danny DeVito - Sam Stone

“- Bobby Ciaro: Someday, your gonna be president of the United States.
- Jimmy Hoffa: Fuck that. Someday, I'm gonna be president of the Teamsters.”

Danny DeVito - Bobby Ciaro
Jack Nicholson - James R. Hoffa

“- Bobby Ciaro: I can't even scratch myself.
- Jimmy Hoffa: Do you itch?
- Bobby Ciaro: No.
- Jimmy Hoffa: What the fuck are you complaining about then?”

Danny DeVito - Bobby Ciaro
Jack Nicholson - James R. Hoffa

“- Owen: Your wife, she had a little trouble walking, but that was from the gardener.
- Larry: You saw my wife?
- Owen: She was kind of a tart, Larry. Although I can see why you married her. She was very beautiful.”
Danny DeVito - Owen
Billy Crystal - Larry

- Daphne: What's your name?
- Rocks: They call me "No".
- Daphne: Silly, that's not your name. That's what they say when you're bad.
Diane Keaton - Daphne
Danny DeVito - Rocks

- Bill "BB" Babowsky: This is the ultimate "fuck you"! I just poked your wife!
- Ernest Tilley: What are you talking about?
- Bill "BB" Babowsky: Yeah, she's in my bed right now with a very big smile on her face.
- Ernest Tilley: Well, that's just fine by me. She's a pain in the ass! An albatross around my neck! You're welcome to her. Keep her,... (continue)(continue reading)
Richard Stephen Dreyfuss - Bill "BB" Babowsky
Danny DeVito - Ernest Tilley

“We make passionate love the rest of the night. The first one that comes, loses.”

Danny DeVito - Lawrence Garfield

“- John Leary: You have to trust me.
- Gordon Layton: Why?
- John Leary: Because I can't lose my kids.”

Danny DeVito - John Leary
Carl Gabriel Yorke - Gordon Layton

“- Volunteer Bimbo: You are the coolest role-model a young person could have!
- The Penguin: And you're the hottest young person a role-model could have.”
Lisa Guerrero - Volunteer Bimbo
Danny DeVito - Penguin

“- Mickey Bergman: Don't you want to hear my last words?
- Joe Moore: I just did.”

Danny DeVito - Mickey Bergman
Gene Hackman - Joe Moore

“- Julie Ubriacco: Look, they like each other.
- Daphne: Mongrel.
- Rocks: Bitch.”

Tabitha Lupien - Julie Ubriacco
Diane Keaton - Daphne
Danny DeVito - Rocks

“- Larry: Why did you kill my wife?
- Owen: I thought you wanted me to. That was the deal we made that night. You told me that hated your wife. You wished she was dead. I told you I hated my momma. I told you I wished she was dead. You told me to see that Hitchcock film about swapping murders. I figured I kill your wife and you kill my momma....” (continue)(continue reading)
Billy Crystal - Larry
Danny DeVito - Owen

“- Vincent Benedict: You could be a boxer or something. I could be your manager.
- Julius Benedict: No, I could never fight for money.
- Vincent Benedict: Well that's fine. You fight, I'll keep the money.”
Danny DeVito - Vincent Benedict
Arnold Schwarzenegger - Julius Benedict

I had a dream once. I dreamed I would train the greatest hero there ever was. So great, the gods would hang a picture of him in the stars for everyone to see. And everyone would say: "That's Phil's boy". That's right... ah, but dreams are for rookies. A guy can only take so much disappointment.

Danny DeVito - Phil

“- MP Directing Traffic: Look, here's what you do. You go right here. Take another right at the P.X. Go half a click until you see the D.P.T.M. Center. Then take a left.
- Bill Rago: P.M., P.X.
- MP Directing Traffic: If you hit the R.F.P.C., you've gone too far.
- Bill Rago: D.P.T.M., R.F.P.C. Can I buy a vowel?”
Gary DeWitt Marshall - MP Directing Traffic
Danny DeVito - Bill Rago

“A man hasn't any idea what his soul looks like until he gazes into the eyes for the woman that he's married to. And then, if he's any kind of decent human being, he spends the next couple of days throwing up. Because no honest man can stand that image.”
Danny DeVito - Phil Cooper

“Women can be a lot meaner than we give them credit for.”
Danny DeVito - Gavin D'Amato

“I'll bet you can buy a great townhouse down here for around five or six dollars.”
Danny DeVito - Ralph

“- Sam Stone: The last time we spoke you said my wife would be in the morgue if I didn't pay. Well, I didn't pay and just today I was at the morgue and she wasn't there. You lied to me! You know what I think?
- Ken Kessler: No.
- Sam Stone: You got no nuts! What do I have to do? Put a gun in your hand, aim and pull your finger down you spineless...” (continue)(continue reading)
Danny DeVito - Sam Stone
Judge Reinhold - Ken Kessler

“- Batman: What do you want?
- The Penguin: Ah, the direct approach. I admire that in a man with a mask.”
Michael Keaton - Batman
Danny DeVito - Penguin

“- Dr. Diana Reddin: What do you mean, what am I doing here? It's my baby, not yours!
- Dr. Larry Arbogast: Hey. I put it in there.
- Dr. Diana Reddin: It's my egg!
- Dr. Larry Arbogast: Yeah, just 'cause your egg's in some guy doesn't make you the mother!”
Emma Thompson - Dr. Diana Reddin
Danny DeVito - Dr. Larry Arbogast

“One town, a million troubles. The one and only Thebes. The Big Olive itself. If you can make it there, you can make it anywhere.”

Danny DeVito - Phil

“We're the same... We care more about the game than the players.”

Danny DeVito - Lawrence Garfield