Jack Nicholson movie quotes

“- Irene Walker: I can't get over it. What kinda creep wouldn't catch a baby? If it was real it coulda been crippled for life.
- Charley Partanna: He wasn't paid to bodyguard the baby.”

Kathleen Turner - Irene Walker
Jack Nicholson - Charley Partanna

“- Khan: You are very successful.
- Jake Gittes: Oh, I can't complain.
- Khan: Does that mean you are happy?
- Jake Gittes: Who can answer that question off the top of their head?
- Khan: Anyone who's happy.”
James Hong - Khan
Jack Nicholson - Jake Gittes

“- Carol Connelly: Is it a secret what you're doing here?
- Melvin Udall: I had to see you.
- Carol Connelly: Because?
- Melvin Udall: It relaxes me. I'd feel better sitting ouside your apartment on the curb than any other place I can think of or imagine.”
Julie Benz - Carol Connelly
Jack Nicholson - Melvin Udall

“I now do what other people only dream. I make art until someone dies. See? I am the world's first fully functioning homicidal artist.”
Jack Nicholson - Joker

“I'm trying to be a gentleman here. Now, get on your knees, put your ass in the air, and don't move until I say to.”
Jack Nicholson - Jake Gittes

“In every conflict there are casualties. The question is, what has been lost and what has been gained?”
Jack Nicholson - James R. Hoffa

“I look upon a woman as a whole.”
Jack Nicholson - Harry Bliss

“As long as you keep your work zipped up around me, I don't give a rat-crap what or where you shove your show. Are we done being neighbors for now?”

Jack Nicholson - Melvin Udall

“- Carol Connelly: You're going to die soon with that diet. You know that, right?
- Melvin Udall: Oh, we're all going to die soon. I will, you will, and it sure sounds like your son will.
- Carol Connelly: If you ever mention my son again, you will not be able to eat here any more, Mr Udall. Do you understand me? Give me some sign you understand...” (continue)(continue reading)
Julie Benz - Carol Connelly
Jack Nicholson - Melvin Udall

A man could look at anything, and make something out of it. For instance, I look at you and I think "What could I use you for?".

Jack Nicholson - Frank Costello

“- Louise Bryant: Would you rather I not smoke during rehearsal?
- Eugene O'Neill: I'd rather you went up in flames than crush out your cigarette during a monologue about birth.”
Diane Keaton - Louise Bryant
Jack Nicholson - Eugene O'Neill

“- Jake Gittes: I wouldn't extort a nickel from my worst enemy. That's where I draw the line.
- Loach: Well, I'll tell you, Jake. I knew a whore once. For the right amount of money, she'd piss in a guy's face. But she wouldn't shit on his chest. You see, that's where she drew the line.”
Jack Nicholson - Jake Gittes
Keith David - Loach

“- Will Randall: You are such a polished ass kisser that it takes my breath away.
- Stewart Swinton: I kiss 'em like I see 'em.”
Jack Nicholson - Will Randall
James Spader - Stewart Swinton

“- Dr. Buddy Rydell: Dave assaulted a female flight attendant in mid-air.
Stacy: Nice.
- Gina: I bet you beat her good.
- Dave Buznik: I didn't beat anybody. I touched a woman...
- Chuck: Liar, bullshitter, you're a woman beater! And you can't admit it, because you're a deluded piece of garbage!
- Dave Buznik: I don't know about all that but......” (continue)(continue reading)

Jack Nicholson - Dr. Buddy Rydell
January Jones - Gina
Adam Sandler - Dave Buznik
John Turturro - Chuck

“- Harry Sanborn: I don't like thinking about you all the time and worrying about how you are. Sometimes worrying about you feels like a full-time job.
- Erica Barry: Well I'm doing just fine, so you don't have to work that shift anymore!”
Jack Nicholson - Harry Sanborn
Diane Keaton - Erica Barry

“If the Martians land, the're gonna need a place to stay. Just like everybody else.”
Jack Nicholson - Art Land

“- Francis Phelan: She was gonna die anyway. Her time was up.
- Helen: I don't believe that. I believe you die when you can't stand it any more. Take as much as you can, then you... You die when you can.”

Jack Nicholson - Francis Phelan
Meryl Streep - Helen

“- Kitty Berman: Does it ever go away?
- Jake Gittes: What's that?
- Kitty Berman: The past.
- Jake Gittes: Well, I think you have to work real hard at that.”
Meg Tilly - Kitty Berman
Jack Nicholson - Jake Gittes

“- Cat: Listen to me. I'm sure you can appreciate somethin'. We got a business situation here. These independents get too big, that comes out of our end.
- Charlie Smith: So, what, you just fuckin' kill 'em?
- Cat: We take care of business. That's all we do. We take care of business.
- Charlie Smith: You see this fuckin' line? This line right...” (continue)(continue reading)
Harvey Keitel - Cat
Jack Nicholson - Charlie Smith

“Relatively soon, I will die. Maybe in 20 years, maybe tomorrow, it doesn't matter. Once I am dead and everyone who knew me dies too, it will be as though I never existed. What difference has my life made to anyone. None that I can think of. None at all.”
Jack Nicholson - Warren Schmidt

“I don't want to be a product of my environment. I want my environment to be a product of me.”
Jack Nicholson - Frank Costello

“- Francis Phelan: I don't think about it that much anymore. To tell you the truth, I'm over the hill.
- Rosskam: Over the hill? How old are you, 62?
- Francis Phelan: I'm not that old.
- Rosskam: 71 here. I don't go over no hills. Four, five times a night, I get it with the old woman, and in the daylight I go house to house, I get offers. I...” (continue)(continue reading)

Jack Nicholson - Francis Phelan
Hy Anzell - Rosskam

“- Harry Sanborn: Soft lips.
- Erica Barry: I'm so glad they still work. I haven't used them for kissing in such a long time, more like for wearing lipstick... and whistling.”

Jack Nicholson - Harry Sanborn
Diane Keaton - Erica Barry

“- Aurora Greenway: What is it that makes you so insistent on shocking and insulting me? I mean, I really hate that way of talking. You must know this. Why do you do it?
- Garrett Breedlove: I'll tell you, Aurora. I don't know what it is about you, but you do bring out the devil in me.”
Shirley MacLaine - Aurora Greenway
Jack Nicholson - Garrett Breedlove

“Church wants you on your place. Kneel, stand, kneel, stand. If you go for that sort of thing, I don't know what to do for you.”
Jack Nicholson - Frank Costello