Keanu Reeves movie quotes

“- Ted: Whoa. He didn't even card us, dude.
- Bill: Yeah, we have to remember this place.”

Keanu Reeves - Ted 'Theodore' Logan
Alex Winter - Bill S. Preston

“- Johnny Utah: The beaches are always being closed because of waste spills, right? And surfers are territorial, they stick to certain breaks. If we can get some hair samples, and get a match to a certain beach, we'd know which break the Ex-Presidents surf. You buyin' this?
- Pappas: No. But let's do it anyway; it'll drive Harp crazy.”

Keanu Reeves - Johnny Utah
Gary Busey - Pappas

“- Gabriel: I'm simply seeking to inspire mankind to all that is intended.
- John Constantine: By handing Earth over to the son of the Devil?”
Tilda Swinton - Gabriel
Keanu Reeves - John Constantine

“Nice hairdo... you get FM on that?”
Keanu Reeves - Winston Connelly

“- Neo: Who are you?
- Bane: Still don't recognize me? I admit it is difficult to even think encased in this rotting piece of meat. The stink of it filling every breath, a suffocating cloud you can't escape. Disgusting. How pathetically fragile it is. Nothing this weak is meant to survive.”
Keanu Reeves - Neo
Ian Bliss - Bane

“- Ted: Bill, what happened?
- Bill: Ted, we're dead, dude.
- Ted: No way!
- Bill: Yes way!”
Keanu Reeves - Ted
Alex Winter - Bill

“I will change when everybody expects it the least.”
Keanu Reeves - Scott Favor

“- Ortiz: You're not too bright, man, but ya got some big round hairy cajones.
- Jack Traven: That's very gross, Ortiz.
- Ortiz: Huh, can't even pay him a compliment.”
Carlos Carrasco - Ortiz
Keanu Reeves - Jack Traven

“- Grace Garcia: How can they just wave a pen and change what happens?
- Tom Ludlow: We're the police. We can do whatever the hell we want. It doesn't matter what happens; it's how we write it up.”
Martha Higareda - Grace Garcia
Keanu Reeves - Tom Ludlow

“- Nelson Moss: Why a month?
- Sara Deever: Because it's long enough to be meaningful, but short enough to stay out of trouble.”
Keanu Reeves - Nelson Moss
Charlize Theron - Sara Deever

“- Freud: And so, Ted's father's own fear of failure has caused him to make his son the embodiment of all his deepest anxieties about himself. And hence, his aggression transference onto Ted.
- Ted: Whoa...
- Freud: Okay, Ted?
- Ted: Yes... Thank you very much, Sigmund Freud...
- Freud: Bill?
- Bill: Nah. Just got a minor oedipal complex.”
Rod Loomis - Freud
Keanu Reeves - Ted 'Theodore' Logan

“- Beelzebub: Choose your eternity!
- Ted: Choose your own, you fag!”
Keanu Reeves - Ted

“I know how not knowing hurts.”

Keanu Reeves - Tom Ludlow

“Messing with the devil's gonna get you burned. Everybody knows that.”

Keanu Reeves - Donnie Barksdale

“I have absolutely no idea how you are able to do some of the things you do, but I believe there's a reason for that as well. I only hope we understand that reason before it's too late.”

Keanu Reeves - Councillor Hamann

“I don't want to go to dinner, I want to get naked with Sarah Deaver.”
Keanu Reeves - Nelson Moss

“You hate me, but you need me.”

Keanu Reeves - Tom Ludlow

“I saw her. I kissed her. I love her.”
Keanu Reeves - Alex Wyler

“- Ben Harp: You know nothing. In fact, you know less than nothing. If you knew that you knew nothing, then that would be something, but you don't.You're a real blue flame special, aren't you, son? Young, dumb and full of cum, I know. What I don't know is how you got assigned out here in Los Angeles with us. Guess we must just have ourselves an...” (continue)(continue reading)
John C. McGinley - Ben Harp
Keanu Reeves - Johnny Utah

“- Ted: Our first guest speaker comes from the year 400 BC, a time when most of the world looked like the cover of the Led Zeppelin album, Houses of the Holy.
- Bill: We were there. There were many steps and columns. It was most tranquil.
- Ted: He is sometimes known as the father of modern thought. He was the teacher of Plato, who was in turn...” (continue)(continue reading)
Keanu Reeves - Ted 'Theodore' Logan
Alex Winter - Bill S. Preston

“You don't walk off the roof of a building without leaving something behind.”
Keanu Reeves - John Constantine

“- Pappas: Listen, you snot-nosed little shit! I was takin' shrapnel in Khe Sanh when you were crappin' in your hands and rubbin' it on your face!
- Johnny Utah: You mad?
- Pappas: Yeah, I'm mad!
- Johnny Utah: You mad?!
- Pappas: Yeah, I'm mad! Whatcha gonna do about it?!
- Johnny Utah: Feels good, doesn't it?”
Gary Busey - Pappas
Keanu Reeves - Johnny Utah

“- Ted: Bill?
- Bill: What?
- Ted: I believe our adventure through time has taken a most serious turn.”

Keanu Reeves - Ted 'Theodore' Logan
Alex Winter - Bill S. Preston

“- Tom Ludlow: What do they call you?
- Quicks: They call me fucking Quicks.
- Tom Ludlow: Quicks? Not quick enough.”
Keanu Reeves - Tom Ludlow
Noel Gugliemi - Quicks

“- John Constantine: I'm a suicide, Angela. When I die, the rules say I've got just one place to go...
- Angela Dodson: You're trying to buy your way into heaven.
- John Constantine: What would you do if you were sentenced to a prison where half the inmates were put there by you?”

Keanu Reeves - John Constantine
Rachel Weisz - Angela Dodson