Will Ferrell movie quotes

“- Bob Woodward: How old are you?
- Betsy Jobs: Twenty-three.
- Bob Woodward: Is that your combined ages?
- Betsy Jobs: There's no need to be snotty.”

Will Ferrell - Bob Woodward
Kirsten Dunst - Betsy Jobs

“Broadway! I haven't been so happy since we crushed Poland!”
Will Ferrell - Franz Liebkind

“- Brennan Huff: Hey Derek, you know what's good for shoulder pain?
- Derek: What?
- Brennan Huff: If you lick my butt hole.”
Will Ferrell - Brennan Huff
Adam Scott - Derek

“- Reese Bobby: Now, there's nothing like driving to avoid jail. Nothing hones your mind and your instincts like necessity. So I taped a kilo of cocaine underneath the car and called the boys in blue. Now, the way I figure it, you got about two minutes before they show up and you do 5 to 10. So, what's it going to be? Fear or prison?
- Ricky...” (continue)(continue reading)
Gary Cole - Reese Bobby
Will Ferrell - Ricky Bobby

“- Ricky Bobby: You're in America, okay? Greatest country on the planet.
- Jean Girard: Well, what have you given the world apart from George Bush, Cheerios, and the ThighMaster?
- Ricky Bobby: Chinese food?
- Cal Naughton Jr.: Chinese food.
- Jean Girard: That's from China.
- Ricky Bobby: Pizza.
- Jean Girard: Italy.
- Cal Naughton Jr.:...” (continue)(continue reading)
Will Ferrell - Ricky Bobby
Sacha Baron Cohen - Jean Girard
John C. Reilly - Cal Naughton Jr.

“I'm Ricky Bobby. If you don't chew Big Red then fuck you.”

Will Ferrell - Ricky Bobby

“- Terry Hoitz: What is this?
- Allen Gamble: It's my car; it's a Prius.
- Terry Hoitz: I feel like we're literally driving around in a vagina.”
Mark Wahlberg - Terry Hoitz
Will Ferrell - Allen Gamble

“Your home... is with me.”

Will Ferrell - Jack Wyatt

“- Jackie Moon: Brought a secret weapon. It's going to make us look extra cool on Tv.
- Bee Bee Ellis: What the hell is that?
- Jackie Moon: It's eyeliner dummy. Now who's first? Monix?
- Monix: Oh yeah... let me get a fresh Maxi-Pad outta my purse.”
Will Ferrell - Jackie Moon
DeRay Davis - Bee Bee Ellis
Woody Harrelson - Monix

“- Buddy: What's it like?
- Santa: Well, there are some things you should know. First off, you see gum on the street, leave it there. It isn't free candy.”

Will Ferrell - Buddy
Ed Asner - Santa

“- Carolyn: Your costume is pretty.
- Buddy: It's not a costume. I'm an elf. Well, technically, I'm a human, but I was raised by elves.
- Carolyn: I'm a human... raised by humans.”
Lydia Lawson-Baird - Carolyn
Will Ferrell - Buddy

“Are we about to get it on? Because I'm as hard as a diamond in an ice storm right now.”

Will Ferrell - Ricky Bobby

“- Franz Liebkind: Not many people know this, but the Fuhrer was descended from a long line of English queens.
- Max Bialystock: Is that right?”
Will Ferrell - Franz Liebkind
Nathan Lane - Max Bialystock

“- Allen Gamble: I can't hear! I can't hear! There's blood blisters on my hands! Oh, my God! How do you walk away in a movie without flinching when it explodes behind them? There's no way! I call bullshit on that! When they flew the Millennium Falcon outside of the Death Star, and it was followed by the explosion, that was bullshit!
- Terry Hoitz...” (continue)(continue reading)

Will Ferrell - Allen Gamble
Mark Wahlberg - Terry Hoitz

“This meal is terrible... it tastes like roasted dog asshole.”
Will Ferrell - Allen Gamble

- Brennan Huff: Mom, I honestly thought I was gonna be raped for a second. He had the craziest look in his eyes. And at one point he said, "lets get it on".
- Dale Doback: That was about the fighting. I am so not a raper!
- Brennan Huff: Look, I didn't touch your drum set, okay?
- Dale Doback: I witnessed with my eyes your testicles touching my... (continue)(continue reading)
Will Ferrell - Brennan Huff
John C. Reilly - Dale Doback

“- Terry Hoitz: You feel that, Allen? Huh? That tingling in your balls? Big metal butterflies fluttering around your stomach?
- Allen Gamble: Are you sure you don't have testicular cancer?”
Mark Wahlberg - Terry Hoitz
Will Ferrell - Allen Gamble

“- Ricky Bobby: Holding hands with a man makes me terribly uncomfortable.
- Jean Girard: It's a sign of friendship in many countries.
- Ricky Bobby: Well, not here.
- Jean Girard: There is nothing sexual about it. Please don't be worried about the fact that I have an erection. It has nothing to do with you.”
Will Ferrell - Ricky Bobby
Sacha Baron Cohen - Jean Girard

Don't you know I'd never say "fuck". Fuck.
Will Ferrell - Ron Burgundy

- Ricky Bobby: From now on, you're the Magic Man and I'm El Diablo.
- Cal Naughton Jr.: What does “Diablo” mean?
- Ricky Bobby: It's like... Spanish for like a fighting chicken.
Will Ferrell - Ricky Bobby
John C. Reilly - Cal Naughton Jr.

“- Allen Gamble: I'm so tired of you getting angry, and yelling all the time, it's exhausting. I feel like I'm partners with the Hulk.
- Terry Hoitz: You want to know why I'm so angry all the time? Because the more I try to do right the more I screw things up.”
Will Ferrell - Allen Gamble
Mark Wahlberg - Terry Hoitz

“- Ron Burgundy: Brian, I'm gonna be honest with you, that smells like pure gasoline.
- Brian Fantana: They've done studies, you know. 60% of the time, it works every time.
- Ron Burgundy: That doesn't make sense.”

Will Ferrell - Ron Burgundy
Paul Rudd - Brian Fantana

“- Jack Wyatt: I'm a tool?
- Ritchie: Yeah, but a good tool. Like a jack-saw!”

Will Ferrell - Jack Wyatt
Jason Schwartzman - Ritchie

“Grief is nature's most powerful aphrodisiac.”
Will Ferrell - Chazz Reinhold

“- Ricky Bobby: [to Jean Girard]I can't understand a word you've said the whole time.
- Cal Naughton Jr.: Did you eat some peanut butter or something?
- Ricky Bobby: Yeah, you sound like a dog with peanut butter on the roof of your mouth.
- Jean Girard: I think what you are hearing is my accent. I am French.”
Will Ferrell - Ricky Bobby
John C. Reilly - Cal Naughton Jr.
Sacha Baron Cohen - Jean Girard