Will Ferrell movie quotes

“- Ricky Bobby: You can't have two number ones.
- Cal Naughton Jr.: Yeah, 'cause that would be eleven.”
Will Ferrell - Ricky Bobby
John C. Reilly - Cal Naughton Jr.

Let me just quote the late, great Colonel Sanders, who said "I'm too drunk to taste this chicken”.
Will Ferrell - Ricky Bobby

“If you ain't first, you're last.”
Will Ferrell - Ricky Bobby

“I'm going to be killed by a fictional character!”
Will Ferrell - Jack Wyatt

“- Chazz Michael Michaels: The night is a very dark time for me...
- Jimmy MacElroy: It's dark for everyone, moron!
- Chazz Michael Michaels: Not for Alaskans or dudes with night vision goggles!”
Will Ferrell - Chazz Michael Michaels
Jon Heder - Jimmy MacElroy

“They're like 4-foot whirling dervishes. I don't even know what a whirling dervish is but that's what they're like.”

Will Ferrell - Phil Weston

“I may already be dead, just not typed.”
Will Ferrell - Harold Crick

“I'm a sex addict. It's my cross to bear. It's a real disease with doctors and medicine and everything!”
Will Ferrell - Chazz Michael Michaels

“- Ron Burgundy: Hey Garth. How's the divorce?
- Garth Holliday: Oh, not so good... I'll probably never see my kids again.
- Ron Burgundy: [interrupts, not listening] Fantastic!”
Will Ferrell - Ron Burgundy
Chris Parnell - Garth Holliday

“- Ana Pascal: It's my weekly evil-conspiracy and needlepoint group. You wanna come?
- Harold Crick: I left my thimbles and socialist reading material at home.”
Maggie Gyllenhaal - Ana Pascal
Will Ferrell - Harold Crick

“- Ricky Bobby: Wow I feel like I'm in the Highlander.
- Jean Girard: What's the Highlander?
- Ricky Bobby: It's a movie.
- Jean Girard: Oh any good?
- Ricky Bobby: Very good. It won the academy award.
- Jean Girard: Oh for what?
- Ricky Bobby: Best movie ever made.”
Will Ferrell - Ricky Bobby
Sacha Baron Cohen - Jean Girard

“Where is my dog? I will die if I do not have him back!”
Will Ferrell - Jack Wyatt

“Everybody panic! Oh my God, there's a bear loose in the coliseum! There will be no refunds! Your refund will be escaping this deathtrap with your life! If you have a small child, use it as a shield! They love the tender meat!”
Will Ferrell - Jackie Moon

“- Dale Doback: You and your mom are hilbillies. This is a house of learned doctors.
- Brennan Huff: You're not a doctor... you're a big, fat, curly-headed fuck!”
John C. Reilly - Dale Doback
Will Ferrell - Brennan Huff

“- Jackie Moon: Nothing in the rulebook that says you can't play drunk.
- Dick Pepperfield: Well actually there is.”
Will Ferrell - Jackie Moon
Andrew Daly - Dick Pepperfield

“- Harold Crick: Ten seconds ago you said you wouldn't help me.
- Professor Jules Hilbert: It's been a very revealing ten seconds, Harold.”
Will Ferrell - Harold Crick
Dustin Hoffman - Professor Jules Hilbert

“- Brennan Huff: I did start taking baby aspirin. To reduce my risk for heart attack.
- Dale Doback: That makes sense. You gotta keep an eye on it.”
Will Ferrell - Brennan Huff
John C. Reilly - Dale Doback

“Oh, I'm sorry, did my pin get in the way of your ass? Do me a favor and lose five pounds immediately or get out of my building like now!”

Will Ferrell - Mugatu

“- Isabel Bigelow: Oh, we're going to kiss aren't we?
- Jack Wyatt: I thought so. But, thanks for ruining the moment Miss Narrator.”
Nicole Kidman - Isabel Bigelow
Will Ferrell - Jack Wyatt

“I wanna say something. I'm gonna put it out there; if you like it, you can take it, if you don't, send it right back. I want to be on you.
[Veronica turns and walks away]
Wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I... I wanna be on you.”
Will Ferrell - Ron Burgundy

I've sent in my application to the Real World. So I'm hoping to hear back from that. I'm putting a lot of my eggs into that basket, the MTV basket. I'm also thinking about getting a gun, and dealing crack. Being a crack dealer. Not like a mean crack dealer, but like... like a nice one. Kinda friendly like, "hey, what's up guys? Want some... (continue)(continue reading)
Will Ferrell - Ricky Bobby

“- Mark Avery: Hi, I'm Mark Avery, you know, I like to keep my pimp hands strong. You dig, Cracker? Ya feel me?
- Phil Weston: What does that mean?
- Mark Avery: I don't know, I heard it on a rap video once.”
Steven Anthony Lawrence - Mark Avery
Will Ferrell - Phil Weston

“- Ron Burgundy: Discovered by the Germans in 1904, they named it San Diego, which of course in German means a whale's vagina.
- Veronica Corningstone: No, there's no way that's correct.
- Ron Burgundy: I'm sorry, I was trying to impress you.”
Will Ferrell - Ron Burgundy
Christina Applegate - Veronica Corningstone

“- Derek Zoolander: What is this? A center for ants?
- Mugatu: What?
- Derek Zoolander: How can we be expected to teach children to learn how to read... if they can't even fit inside the building?”

Ben Stiller - Derek Zoolander
Will Ferrell - Mugatu

“You sit on a throne of lies!”

Will Ferrell - Buddy