Medicine quotes

“It's the times. They are a changing. Something's blowing in the wind. Fetch me my diet pills, would you, hon?”
Divine - Edna Turnblad

“We gave her what we call ALZ-112, a gene therapy that allows the brain to create its own cells in order to repair itself. In biology, this is called neurogenesis. Here at GenSys, we call it a cure to Alzheimer's.”

James Franco - Will Rodman

“- Dr. Eve Saks: We can make you comfortable.
- Ron Woodroof: What? Hook me up to the morphine drip, let me fade on out? Nah. Sorry, lady, but I prefer to die with my boots on.”
Jennifer Garner - Dr. Eve Saks
Matthew McConaughey - Ron Woodroof

“I'm gonna find the guy who invented Xylocaine and kiss his ass on Hollywood and Vine!”
Burt Reynolds - Sonny Hooper

“- Doctor #1: A simple evacuation of the epidural hematoma will relieve the pressure!
- McCoy: My God man, drilling holes in his head is not the answer! The artery must be repaired! Now, put away your butcher's knives and let me save this patient before it's too late!”
David Ellenstein - Doctor #1
DeForest Kelley - McCoy

“There's nothing wrong with you that can't be cured with a little Prozac and a polo mallet.”
Woody Allen - Larry Lipton

“- Dr. Cyril Wecht: Yeah, well, it's not medicine. I don't know what it is.
- Dr. Julian Bailes: It's business.”

Albert Brooks - Dr. Cyril Wecht
Alec Baldwin - Dr. Julian Bailes

“I'm on the pill... just in case.”
Leslie Browne - Emilia

“- Donald Carruthers: Do you know what? Urine is good for your skin? My grandmother... I swear to god, my grandmother told me. She said... She didn't, 'cause when I used to get a zit or something, she said...
- Richard Messner: She pissed on your face?
- Donald Carruthers: Get the fuck out of here!”
Ray Liotta - Donald Carruthers
Ryan Reynolds - Richard Messner

“What the hell kind of meds they giving you? Alprazolam: that's generic xanax. Hydrocodone: that's generic Vicodin. Probably Canadian. Where's the dihydromorphinone? Is this amateur hour? Get that doctor in here; you just saved a hundred people!”

John Goodman - Harling Mays

“- Kyle: They say if you snort some Ritalin, it's a cakewalk!
- Wilee: Sage advice.”
Aaron Tveit - Kyle
Joseph Gordon-Levitt - Wilee

“- Gary: I need to see something.
- Jack Reacher: How about the inside of an ambulance?”
Dylan Kussman - Gary
Tom Cruise - Jack Reacher

“- Melman: What, you don't have doctors here?
- Stephen: Well not any more.
- Melman: What if you catch a cold or something.
- Additional Giraffe: We go over to the dying holes, and we die.”
David Schwimmer - Melman
Stephen Kearin - Stephen
Harland Williams - Additional Giraffe

“- Elizabeth Driscoll: Boccardo's pills. He eats it like candy... or used to. Take some.
- Matthew Bennell: What are they?
- Elizabeth Driscoll: Speed. They'll keep us awake.
- Matthew Bennell: How many are you suppose to take?
- Elizabeth Driscoll: It says take one.
- Matthew Bennell: Take five.”
Brooke Adams - Elizabeth Driscoll
Donald Sutherland - Matthew Bennell

“- Tom Wall: Frank, what are you doing back there?
- Frank Pierce: I'm sick, Tom. I need a cure. Vitamin B cocktail, followed by an amp of glucose and a drop of adrenaline. Not as good as beer, but it's all I got.”
Tom Sizemore - Tom Wolls
Nicolas Cage - Frank Pierce

“I always had a feeling that healing-any-injury thing was bullshit.”
Garry Shandling - Harold Anderson

“You can survive a stroke, but the high prices of medicine will give you a heart attack.”
Bernie Mac - Mitch Gilliam

“- Mayor Phlegming: Son, do me a favor and read what it says on your arm.
- Drix: 'For the temporary relief of symptoms associated with... '
- Mayor Phlegming: Exactly! Temporary. You're nothing but a wannabe, a placebo, a generic brand. Marked-down, over-the-counter, useless Tic-Tac!”
William Shatner - Mayor Phlegmming
David Hyde Pierce - Drix

“Dr. Banzai is using a laser to vaporize a pineal tumor without damaging the parthogenital plate. A subcutaneous microphone will allow the patient to transmit verbal instructions to his own brain.”
Clancy Brown - Rawhide

“- Ms. Martin: Generic alteration?
- Dr. Glen Thompson: Genetic.
- Ms. Martin: Whatever.”

Meg Foster - Ms. Martin
Richard Crenna - Dr. Glen Thompson

“It's a little severe, but it's always the worst tasting medicine that does the most good.”

Peter Cook - Sir Mortimer Chris

“- Jane: Lime cordial, delicious!
- Michael: Strawberry! Mmm.
- Mary Poppins: Rum punch! Quite satisfactory [hiccup].”

Karen Dotrice - Jane Banks
Matthew Garber - Michael Banks
Julie Andrews - Mary Poppins

“- Binx: What are those, uppers or downers?
- Lloyd: They're for asthma, you want one?”

Christian Slater - Binx
Keith Gordon - Lloyd

- Armand Goldman: What are you giving him drugs for? What the hell are Pirin tablets?
- Agador: It's aspirin with the "A" and the "S" scraped off.
- Armand Goldman: My God, what a brilliant idea!
Robin Williams - Armand Goldman
Hank Azaria - Agador

“- Mrs. Teevee: I think I'm going to be seasick!
- Willy Wonka: [handing something to Mrs. Teevee] Here, take these.
- Mrs. Teevee: What are they?
- Willy Wonka: Rainbow drops. Suck them and you can spit in seven different colors!”
Nora Denney - Mrs. Teevee
Gene Wilder - Willy Wonka