Old age quotes

- Leo Bloom: I'm very sorry I caught you feeling up the old lady.
- Max Bialystock: "Feeling up the old lady". Thank you Mr. Tact.
Matthew Broderick - Leo Bloom
Nathan Lane - Max Bialystock

“Got a drink? I'm drier than a ninety-year-old tit.”

Brian Cox - Sean Wallace

“- Dr. Egon Spengler: Vigo the Carpathian. Born 1505, died 1610.
- Dr. Peter Venkman: 105-years-old, he hung in there, didn't he?
- Dr. Raymond Stantz: He didn't die of old age, either. He was poisoned, stabbed, shot, hung, stretched, disembowled, drawn and quartered.”
Harold Ramis - Dr. Egon Spengler
Bill Murray - Dr. Peter Venkman
Dan Aykroyd - Dr. Raymond Stantz

“We can all learn from our older generations. I remember I learned a lot from my grandmother, specifically, how to kill chickens.”
Heather Burns - Cheryl Frasier

“Jamie Blake! Yeah, you used to drive that Formula One. When high-buttoned shoes were in style!”
Jimmy 'The Greek' Snyder - The Greek

“- Richie Norris: I bet you're psyched about the Martians coming Grandma? I mean, you've seen a lot of crazy stuff already. Everyone must have been real scared when they invented the train!
- Grandma Florence Norris: Come on kid I'm not that old!”
Lukas Haas - Richie Norris
Sylvia Sidney - Grandma Florence Norris

“You know in 15 years, you're going to be playing soccer with your tits. What do you think of that?”
Marlon Brando - Paul

“- Barry Kohler: Okay, I'm running it down now. It will only take a second.
- Ezra Lieberman: Take your time, old men don't go back to sleep once they've been awakened.”
Steve Guttenberg - Barry Kohler
Laurence Olivier - Ezra Lieberman

“At 13 I knew everything. Senility set in sometime after that.”

Harvey Forbes Fierstein - Arnold Beckoff

“- Ray: Can we change the music, please? Because I feel like I should be wearing a wig.
- Frenchy: You will be in a couple of years.”
Woody Allen - Ray
Tracey Ullman - Frenchy

“Your mother’s so old that her breast milk is powdered.”
Marlon Wayans - Marcus Copeland

“Now you're talking my language. Old enough to know how it's done and young enough to still want to do it.”

Bill Macy - Doo-Dah

“- Harry Sanborn: I've never seen a woman that age naked before.
- Julian Mercer: You're kidding.
- Harry Sanborn: We're not all doctors.”

Jack Nicholson - Harry Sanborn
Keanu Reeves - Julian Mercer

“- Older Dottie: You haven't changed one bit.
- Older Ellen Sue: Dottie, I married a plastic surgeon.”

Lynn Cartwright - Older Dottie
Eugenia McLin - Older Ellen Sue

“The man who'll blow your brains out is Marshal Zane Cooper. You've probably heard of him, I know what you're thinking, he's old and decrepit, gums his food and his women, but he can still shoot straight.”

Mel Gibson - Bret Maverick

“I've never seen a dead body before. I saw my grandmother of course, but I don't think that counts. I mean, she was alive at the time.”
Christopher Eccleston - David Stephens

“You amuse me and precious little amuses me in this world at my age.”

Charmion King - Aunt Josephine

“When you're seventeen and the world's beautiful, facing facts is just as slick fun as dancing or going to partis. But when you're seventy you don't care about dancing, you don't think about parties anymore and about the only fun you have left is pretending that there ain't any facts to face.”
Beulah Bondi - Lucy Cooper

“- Leonardo: Come, let's see these paintings of yours.
- Gustave: Now?
- Leonardo: When you're as old as I am, son, now is all you've got.”
Patrick Godfrey - Leonardo
Lee Ingleby - Gustave

“In what other business can a man my age walk out on stage, smoke a cigar, tell a few jokes, sing a few songs, and use the same color lipstick that Dolores del Rio uses?”
George Burns - Milt Lackey

“What if I told you insane was working fifty hours a week in some office for fifty years... at the end of which they tell you to piss off? Ending up in some retirement village... hoping to die before suffering the indignity of trying to make it to the toilet on time. Wouldn't you consider that to be insane?”
Steve Buscemi - Garland 'The Marietta Mangler' Greene

“- Patcha: There's two people in there looking for you.
- Kuzco: Who?
- Pacha: A big guy and a skinny old woman.
- Kuzco: Wait, was this woman scary beyond all reason?”
John Goodman - Patcha
David Spade - Kuzco

“- Modell: It used to be so cool to be older and hang out here and, now...
- Laurence 'Shrevie' Schreiber: Now we're older and we're cooler and we're still hanging out here.”
Paul Reiser - Modell
Daniel Stern - Laurence 'Shrevie' Schreiber

“Don't beat yourself up over this. It's not your fault. That's what old people do. They die.”

Vince Vaughn - Beanie

“- Bill Ray: Well, how does it feel to turn eighty?
- Norman Thayer Jr.: Twice as bad as it did turning forty.”
Dabney Coleman - Bill Ray
Henry Fonda - Norman Thayer Jr.