Old age quotes

“Norman Castonmeyer's a dinosaur, he's too fucking blind to find his way into the nearest tar pit. Air pollution counts up to almost seven, George! People are out there on the streets dying of Carbon Monoxide poisoning and they don't even know it!”

E.G. Marshall - Upson Pratt

“- Irv: How are you sheriff?
- Ray Owens: Old.”
Richard Dillard - Irv
Arnold Schwarzenegger - Ray Owens

“- Alex: That's quite a buffet you have there.
- Bea: Thank you, Mr. President.”

Allen Covert - Alex
Shirley Knight - Bea

“They say that it was so hot in the city today, grown men were walking up to cops on street corners begging them to shoot them.”
Al Pacino - Ricky Roma

“- Dr. Nancy Faulkner: Do you have another doctor?
- Bill: I gave them up when I decided to try for old age.”
Julie Cobb - Dr. Nancy Faulkner
George Burns - Bill

“There's no pleasure on earth that's worth sacrificing for the sake of an extra five years in the geriatric ward of the Sunset Old People's Home, Weston-Super-Mare.”

Leo McKern - Horace Rumpole

“- Mitch: I don't mean to be rude, but aren't you a little old to be starting medical school?
- Patch Adams: You know, Babe Ruth was 39 when he joined the Yankees.
- Mitch: No, he wasn't!
- Patch Adams: I know. If you have a better example, please tell me.”
Philip Seymour Hoffman - Mitch
Robin Williams - Patch Adams

“My love, tonight we will celebrate this ecstatic joining of our spirits with the union of our aching bodies.”

Gene Hackman - William B. Tensy

“- Lilly: There was a time you'd have dragged me by my hair out of here for drinking.
- Georgia: I'm too old. So's your hair.”
Felicity Huffman - Lilly
Jane Seymour Fonda - Georgia

People say "oh but he's so much older than you" and you know what, I'm the one having to push him away. We have so much in common, we both love soup and snow peas, we love the outdoors, and talking and not talking.

Jennifer Coolidge - Sherri Ann Cabot

“My dear, when you're as old as I am, you take your men as you find them - if you can find them.”

Helen Broderick - Madge Hardwick

“- Claude Eastman: Will you miss younger men?
- Daniella Eastman: The truth?
- Claude Eastman: No!
- Daniella Eastman: Younger men are like fast food restaurants. The food is fast, but it's not all that good. But, with you it's like dining in the most expensive restaurant in the world. Of course, the service may be a little slow...
- Claude...” (continue)(continue reading)
Dudley Moore - Claude Eastman
Nastassja Kinski - Daniella Eastman

“- Giles Redferne: Let your attention lie before you, not beside you.
- Kassandra: Check this! Some guy from the seventeenth century telling me how to drive. How quick they learn!”

Richard R. Grant - Giles Redferne
Lori Singer - Kassandra

“- Dave: Who's the old guy?
- Fred: You mean Lou? He used run numbers for the dinosaurs.”
Robert Joy - Dave
John McCurry - Fred

“- Chris: Now boys, if either of you give me any grief I swear to God I'll kill you. Dead, murdered, stabbed.
- Daryl: Raped?
- Chris: I'm too old for this crap.”
Elisabeth Shue - Chris
Anthony Rapp - Daryl

“- Grace MacLean: Are you afraid of anything, Tom Booker?
- Tom Booker: Of growing old. Being of no use.”
Scarlett Johansson - Grace MacLean
Robert Redford - Tom Booker

“- Harry Palmer: Are you in charge of this operation?
- Nick: Yes.
- Harry Palmer: You're a bit young, aren't you?
- Nick: You don't worry about my youth, and I won't worry about your age.”
Sir Michael Caine - Harry Palmer
Jason Connery - Nick

“I swear, I'm so pissed off at my mom. As soon as she's of age, I'm putting her in a home.”
Will Ferrell - Brennan Huff

“No decision is easy, Sue. It only looks that way when you're young. When you're older, everything is complicated. There is no black and white, only gray.”
Rip Torn - Dr. George

“- Thelma: You know, Oscar, if I didn't know better, I'd say a nice old grandfather like you was trying to hit on a couple of ladies.
- Oscar Madison: I'm not as old as I look. I had this plastic surgery done recently, and the quack doctor botched it up.
- Holly: Your friend doesn't say much, does he?
- Oscar Madison: He's the doctor who botched...” (continue)(continue reading)

Christine Baranski - Thelma
Walter Matthau - Oscar Madison
Jean Smart - Holly

“Hey! You just made the biggest mistake of your life, baby. I know you're gunna be missing me when you have that big, white, wrinkly body on you with his loose skin and old balls... gross! Ugh!”

Adam Sandler - Sonny Koufax

“It isn't easy at my age to bring together the opportunity, the desire and the energy.”
Gregory Peck - Bitter

“Now that I'm very old myself I find the Grim Reaper has a smile on his face after all.”
Coral Browne - Alice Hargreaves

“When you get out of jail, you'll be more concerned with your arthritis than your libido.”

Kenneth McMillan - Cressner

“Comfort is the curse of age.”
Sir Kenneth Branagh - Herr Knopp, Gestapo