Wife quotes

- Prosecutor: Didn't you say that you... wished your husband was dead?
- Maggie Skolnick: Yes.
- Prosecutor: And when you found the body...
- Maggie Skolnick: Well, I was like..."What strange god did this?".
Valerie Wildman - Prosecutor
Ellen Barkin - Maggie Skolnick

“- Sol Robeson: Now, what is the moral of the story?
- Maximillian Cohen: That a breakthrough will come.
- Sol Robeson: Wrong! The point of the story is the wife. You listen to your wife, she will give you perspective, meaning. You need a break, you have to take a bath or you will get nowhere.”

Mark Margolis - Sol Robeson
Sean Gullette - Maximillian Cohen

“- Lt. Robert Nunally: Your wife? Is she ok?
- Ted Crawford: I don't think she is. I shot her.”
Billy Burke - Lt. Robert Nunally
Philip Anthony Hopkins - Ted Crawford

- Nancy Chambers: I got one.
- Lou: Ah, shit.
- Nancy Chambers: This old drunk was telling jokes to his two drunk friends and he was keeping up his wife who unlike him had a job to go to in the morning. So, see, she gets so fucking fed up she comes downstairs and says, "If he doesn't shut up he's gonna have to find some other place to live... (continue)(continue reading)

Becky Ann Baker - Nancy Chambers
Brent Briscoe - Lou

“- Nash: You had to be here.
- Emil Balan: I've been waiting ten years for this... for what they did too my wife.”
Pierce Brosnan - Nash
Roger Rees - Emil Balan

“- Gerda Wegener: Is there something you’d like to tell me?
- Einar Wegener: Is there something you’d like to know?
- Gerda Wegener: I’m your wife, I know everything.”
Alicia Vikander - Gerda Wegener
Eddie Redmayne - Einar Wegener

“- Victoria: [answers phone] Where are you?
- Harry Turner: In the office.
- Victoria: It doesn't sound like the office.
- Harry Turner: Okay. Maybe I'm visiting an old friend.”
Gina Carano - Victoria
Kellan Lutz - Harry Turner

“My wife loves it when I have to take a cab home because I'm too intoxicated to drive.”
Aasif Mandvi - Aash

“It's not the Senate I'm worried about but their fat wives.”
Claudette Colbert - Cleopatra

“- Tod: Hi. Where's my wife?
- Helen: She's still at school. She's got cheerleading practice.
- Tod: Bitchin'.”

Keanu Reeves - Tod
Dianne Wiest - Helen

- Capt. T.C. Doyle: You slept with the wife of General "Kill-'em-all-and-let-God-sort-them-out" Richardson?
- David Poole: I thought it was his daughter.
- Capt. T.C. Doyle: Oh yeah, he would've been fine with that.
Ray Liotta - Capt. T.C. Doyle
Denis Colin Leary - Lt. David Poole

“I wanna have kids. Just gotta find the right broad like Frankie did. Someone who let me fool around on the weekends and still make pancakes before Sunday Mass.”
Gary Leonard Oldman - Jackie Flannery

“- Larry: Owen, what the hell did you do to my wife?
- Owen: I don't want to say over the phone. All I can tell ya is that I killed her last night.”

Billy Crystal - Larry
Danny DeVito - Owen

“- Lewis Feldman: My Charlotte taught me everything - cooking, dishes how to use a cell phone - even my old laundry.
- Ella Hirsch: You must miss her.
- Lewis Feldman: Everyday. You?
- Ella Hirsch: Well I didn't know your wife, so no I can't say I do.”
Jerry Adler - Lewis Feldman
Shirley MacLaine - Ella Hirsh

“I may not be the most pleasant person to be around, but I got the best woman who was ever on this planet to marry me.”
Clint Eastwood - Walt Kowalski

“- Roxanne Chase-Feder: And this must be your mother.
- Rob Hilliard: My wife.”
Salma Hayek - Roxanne Chase-Feder
Rob Schneider - Rob Hilliard

“A piece of advice. Never hurl in front of your woman. Something to live by.”
Paul Hogan - Porter Ricks

“Do you know why I'm having sex with machinery? Because your father went to have a party and I stayed to raise two kids, and I have no life!”
Dianne Wiest - Helen

“- Beth: The police are here.
- D-Fens: Beth, did you know that in some South American countries it's legal to kill your wife if she insults you?”
Barbara Hershey - Beth
Michael Douglas - D-Fens

“- Jeff Dunham: Does your wife have any powers?
- Melvin the Superhero Guy: Yes, really, uh-huh. Once a month she becomes evil! And I cannot defeat her! Our children run in terror! Our big dog cowers under the couch!”
Jeff Dunham - Himself
Jeff Dunham - Melvin the Superhero Guy

“I can't remember my wife's face. Last week she was with me. Now she's gone. I worry I won't recognize her when I get back home.”
Domhnall Gleeson - Captain Andrew Henry

“It's crazy, but whenever something spectacular happens to me, the first thing I want to do is tell my wife about it. And, after 40 years of marriage, if I can't tell her about something wonderful that happened to me, it sort of stops being wonderful.”
Kevin Kline - Sam Harris

“John... Make any flirtatious remarks in my wife's presence, there will be a reckoning.”
Patrick Wilson - Arthur

“- Marcy Tizard: Go back to your wife!
- Sean Kelly: My ex-wife. We're going through with the divorce.
- Marcy Tizard: They don't have divorce in Ireland.
- Sean Kelly: They do. It just got in.”
Janeane Garofalo - Marcy Tizard
David O'Hara - Sean Kelly

“Helen, what did you really think of me, deep in your heart? Was I really the man you wanted to be with? Was I? Or were you disappointed and too nice to show it?”

Jack Nicholson - Warren Schmidt