Dan Aykroyd movie quotes

- Judge Alvin 'J.P' Valkenheiser: Banker?
- Chris Thorne: No, not banker. Financial publisher. "Thorne Weekly"?
- Judge Alvin 'J.P' Valkenheiser: Ok, banker.

Dan Aykroyd - Judge Alvin 'J.P' Valkenheiser
Chevy Chase - Chris Thorne

“- Vic: In light of Earl's feelings, I think it would be best if we left.
- Enid Keese: Oh, no, no. Sit down, sit down. Let's finish this magnificent meal. Don't worry about Earl. He'll get over his feelings.
- Vic: He spurned my sauce!
- Enid Keese: No, he loves your sauce. He's just jealous, he can't cook.”
Dan Aykroyd - Vic
Kathryn Walker - Enid Keese

“- Vic: And that is where you saw her mammal.
- Earl Keese: Her mammal?
- Vic: Her honkers, Earl.
- Earl Keese: She dropped the towel.
- Vic: Did she drop it, or did you psychically will it to fall?”

Dan Aykroyd - Vic
John Belushi - Earl Keese

“- Dr. Raymond Stantz: Well, no sense in worrying about it now.
- Dr. Peter Venkman: Why worry? Each one of us is carrying an unlicensed nuclear accelerator on his back.”

Dan Aykroyd - Dr. Raymond Stantz
Bill Murray - Dr. Peter Venkman

“If the ionization-rate is constant for all ectoplasmic entities, we can really bust some heads... in a spiritual sense, of course.”
Dan Aykroyd - Dr. Raymond Stantz

“What a gas! Chet's gonna shit a solid gold brick when he sees us, what a great surprise!”

Dan Aykroyd - Roman Craig

“Personally, I liked the university. They gave us money and facilities, we didn't have to produce anything! You've never been out of college! You don't know what it's like out there! I've worked in the private sector. They expect results.”
Dan Aykroyd - Dr. Raymond Stantz

“We got bupkis! We turn ourselves in now, they'll give us twenty years in the electric chair!”

Dan Aykroyd - Mother

“- Captain Gannon: Frank won't be coming into work today Joe.
- Friday: 24 hour virus?
- Captain Gannon: Or tomorrow.
- Friday: 48 hour?
- Captain Gannon: Frank quit, moved to Ukiah, bought a goat farm...”
Harry Morgan - Gannon
Dan Aykroyd - Friday

“- Herb: There's a girl there who will do anything you want for fifty dollars an hour.
- Ed Okin: Like what?
- Herb: Anything! If you want she'll dress like Santa Claus!
- Ed Okin: Will she bring me a pony?”
Dan Aykroyd - Herb
Jeff Goldblum - Ed Okin

“- Sheila Kingston: I'll catch you later, I gotta get a bikini wax.
- Fred Lavery: Ugh! Just stop telling me about that disgusting female stuff. No wonder you were never married.”
Rosie O'Donnell - Sheila
Dan Aykroyd - Fred

“- Streebek: I can't quite place it! It tastes like...
- Friday: Milk. Just like the sign said before you obliterated it. Fresh wholesome milk.
- Streebek: You probably love this stuff.
- Friday: Vitamin D, calcium, essential for good strong bones and healthy teeth. But that's all Greek to you, isn't it, Mr. Gingivitis?”

Tom Hanks - Streebek
Dan Aykroyd - Friday

“- Highway Patrolman: Ah, Americans. Welcome to Ontario, sportsman's paradise!
- Sheriff Bud Boomer: Isn't it though.”
Dan Aykroyd - Highway Patrolman
John Candy - Sheriff Bud Boomer

“- 'Joliet' Jake Blues: What the hell is this?
- Elwood Blues: This was a bargain. I picked it up at the Mount Prospect city police auction last spring. It's an old Mount Prospect police car. They were practically giving 'em away.
- 'Joliet' Jake Blues: Well thank you, pal. The day I get outta prison, my own brother picks me up in a police car!”
John Belushi - Joliet' Jake Blues
Dan Aykroyd - Elwood Blues

“- Clifford Skridlow: Mom, if you want trouble - I am talking about scorched earth, no survival, whole-sale destruction, body-bags and fire trouble, then you just keep comin' on!
- Mom: You don't know what trouble is, jerkoff!
- Clifford Skridlow: Mom, I am going to rip off your head and shit down your neck.”
Dan Aykroyd - Clifford Skridlow
Kate Murtagh - Mom

“- Winston Zeddemore: We conjured up a hundred-foot marshmallow man, blew the top three floors off an uptown high-rise, and ended up getting sued by every city, county, and state agency in New York.
- Dr. Raymond Stantz: Yeah... but what a ride.”
Ernie Hudson - Winston Zeddemore
Dan Aykroyd - Dr. Raymond Stantz

“- Pa Tex: Well I reckon we'll wake up early and eat, then we'll dig for oil and eat, then we'll rope some doggies, bust a few broncs and maybe get a bite to eat. You like Tex Mex?
- North: Sure, I'm a big fan of any food that straddles two borders.
- Pa Tex: That's my boy.”
Dan Aykroyd - Pa Tex
Elijah Wood - North

“- Kate Craig: Ahh! [Kate and Roman run out of their bedroom]
- Roman: What?
- Kate Craig: It touched me!
- Roman: It's been touching you for 12 years, you never freak!
- Kate Craig: Not you! A thing.
- Roman: What thing?
- Chet: [Comes out of his bedroom, along with the rest of the family, and turns on the lights] What's going on?
- Kate Craig:...” (continue)(continue reading)
Annette Bening - Kate Craig
Dan Aykroyd - Roman Craig
John Candy - Chet Ripley

“- Dr. Raymond Stantz: Wait, wait, wait! I've always wanted to do this.
[he yanks a tablecloth off of a table, overturning and shattering everything except the centerpiece in the middle]
- Dr. Peter Venkman: [triumphantly] And the flowers are still standing!”

Dan Aykroyd - Dr. Raymond Stantz
Bill Murray - Dr. Peter Venkman

“- Mike O'Hara: Why did you do that for?
- Jimmy Flaherty: I am sick and tired of your bullshit!”

Daniel Stern - Mike O'Hara
Dan Aykroyd - Jimmy Flaherty

“- Boolie Werthan: How are you, Idella?
- Idella: Living.”
Dan Aykroyd - Boolie Werthan
Esther Rolle - Idella

“- Roman: I was picking my moment.
- Chet: You were picking your nose.”
Dan Aykroyd - Roman Craig

“If you want my secrets, you'll eat my sandwich!”
Dan Aykroyd - Steven Mills

“- Judge Alvin 'J.P' Valkenheiser: Welcome to Supper! How 'bout a nice Hawaiian Punch?
- Chris Thorne: Thank you, Judge. You know, there's nothing better at the end of a long day on the road than a nice warm glass of Hawaiian Punch.”
Dan Aykroyd - Judge Alvin 'J.P' Valkenheiser
Chevy Chase - Chris Thorne

“- Daisy Werthan: It's 7:16!
- Boolie Werthan: You should have a job on the radio announcing the time.”
Jessica Tandy - Daisy Werthan
Dan Aykroyd - Boolie Werthan