John Goodman movie quotes

“- Pacha: I thought you were a changed man.
- Kuzco: Come on, I had to say something to get you to take me back to the palace.
- Pacha: So all of it was a lie?”
John Goodman - Patcha
David Spade - Kuzco

“- Lester Siegel: Hi, I only got a couple of minutes, I'm getting a lifetime achievement award.
- John Chambers: Mazel tov, Lester.
- Lester Siegel: I'd rather stay home and count the wrinkles on my dog's balls.”
Alan Arkin - Lester Siegel
John Goodman - John Chambers

“- The Dude: Five fucking years ago you were divorced!
- Walter Sobchak: So what are you saying? When you get divorced you turn in your library card? You get a new license? You stop being Jewish?”

Jeff Bridges - The Dude
John Goodman - Walter Sobchak

“- Willingham: Just a few quick questions to probe your knowledge of English history...
- Ralph: Fine.
- Willingham: When she failed to give him a son, Henry VIII had Anne Boleyn...?
- Ralph: Look into adoption?
- Willingham: Beheaded.”

Peter O'Toole - Willingham
John Goodman - Ralph

“- Larry: What you gettin'?
- Frank Pierce: I'm not hungry.
- Larry: Oh yeah, you don't eat food.
- Frank Pierce: I eat, I just haven't had coffee yet.
- Larry: Coffee and whiskey, lucky you ain't dead with that diet.”
John Goodman - Larry
Nicolas Cage - Frank Pierce

“- Speed: It didn't amount to anything. It was completely meaningless.
- Pops: How could it be meaningless? I saw my son become a man. I watched a man with courage and integrity drive the pants off of every other driver on that road. This is not meaningless. This is the reason for a father's life.”

Emile Hirsch - Speed
John Goodman - Pops

“- John Hobbes: Why are we here? Us, humans? I mean there's six billion of us, we're like ants, I mean do we care what ants do, from a moral standpoint?
- Jonesy: No. Maybe if you figure it out, you die, you know, from a stroke or a heart attack, you just die, sort of like a promotion.”
Denzel Washington - John Hobbes
John Goodman - Jonesy

“You look good. You got the jail pale. It suits you.”

John Goodman - Uncle Sweetheart

“- Fred Flintstone: This is my office? This is my chair?
- Cliff Vandercave: Yeah, not to throw too much at you on your first day, but this big thing here is your desk.
- Fred Flintstone: My desk?”
John Goodman - Fred Flintstone
Kyle MacLachlan - Cliff Vandercave

“- Queen Mousette: You wish to enter the Battle of the Bands contest.
- Mighty Mack: We wish to win first prize!”
Erykah Badu - Queen Mousette
John Goodman - Mighty Mack McTeer

“Violet, I saw how hard it was on your mom when she didn't make it, but if she was here she'd tell me to shut up, wish you luck and give you a big hug. I'm not going to give you a big hug and I'm not going to wish you luck, but I am going to shut up, sit here with my coffee and pretend to be mad. Is that okay?”

John Goodman - Bill Sanford

“- Pacha: We're on our honeymoon.
- Waitress: Bless you for coming out in public..”

John Goodman - Patcha
Patti Deutsch - Waitress

“Nihilists! Fuck me. I mean, say what you want about the tenets of National Socialism, Dude, at least it's an ethos.”
John Goodman - Walter Sobchak

“Saturday, Donny, is Shabbos, the Jewish day of rest. That means that I don't work, I don't drive a car, I don't fucking ride in a car, I don't handle money, I don't turn on the oven, and I sure as shit don't fucking roll!”
John Goodman - Walter Sobchak

“Look at our current situation with that camel fucker over in Iraq. Pacifism is not something to hide behind.”
John Goodman - Walter Sobchak

“- King Gustav: Really? That often? You must have collected several tails.
- Ralph: I admit I slept with a few. But I'm not like that anymore. Nowadays you can't be too careful. You don't know who they've been with.”

Julian Glover - King Gustav
John Goodman - Ralph

“- Ralph: Do you feel that being the king of a major nation is tougher than you thought?
- King Mulamboa: Yes, it is difficult sometimes, what with the ceremonial duties and official obligations. But I'm quite pleased with the economic progress my country has made. We are hoping to be the first in Africa to market an automobile!”
John Goodman - Ralph
Rudolph Walker - King Mulambon

“- Wilma Flintstone: You two should be ashamed of yourselves!
- Pearl Slaghoople: I got my hands full just being ashamed of him.
- Fred Flintstone: You got your hands full when you scratch your neck!”

Elizabeth Perkins - Wilma Flintstone
Liz Taylor - Pearl Slaghoople
John Goodman - Fred Flintstone

“- Fred Flintstone: Sorry I'm late. Had car trouble, I picked up a nail.
- Mr. Slate: Thank you for sharing that with us, Mr. Flagstone. May we continue?”

John Goodman - Fred Flintstone
Dann Florek - Mr. Slate

“- Willingham: That's George III. You may remember him. He was king during that little temper tantrum you call the Revolutionary War.
- Ralph: Sounds like sour grapes to me, Ced. After all, we did kick your ass.
- Willingham: The loss is entirely yours, or rather, theirs. Try to remember you're an Englishman now.
- Ralph: Okay, but I still think...” (continue)(continue reading)

Peter O'Toole - Willingham
John Goodman - Ralph

“- Pops: You think you can drive a car and change the world? It doesn't work like that!
- Speed: Maybe not, but it's the only thing I know how to do and I gotta do something.”
John Goodman - Pops
Emile Hirsch - Speed

“I hate to bust your bubble, but if you build houses this small, who's gonna live in them?”

John Goodman - Fred Flintstone

“- Fred Flintstone: I'm only one man.
- Barney Rubble: Not from the back.”
John Goodman - Fred Flintstone
Rick Moranis - Barney Rubble

“- Ralph: I was just wondering if you could bring me something. Anything.
- Gordon: Anything, Your Majesty?
- Ralph: I've never had anybody bring me something before. I just wanna try it out.
- Gordon: Certainly. Perhaps an assortment of fine chocolates?
- Ralph: Got any Milk Duds?”
John Goodman - Ralph
Leslie Phillips - Gordon

“You're not going back to work for Pete. I don't care what it takes. I don't care how many bars you have to stand on. You are not coming home. I'm not letting you back in the house. Forget it.”

John Goodman - Bill Sanford