Children quotes

“A kid who wears the same gymnastics sweatshirt three days a week isn't getting laid until he's 29. That's what I know.”
Cameron Diaz - Elizabeth Halsey

“A baby holds your hands, and then suddenly, there's this huge man lifting you off the ground, and then he's gone. Where's that son?”
Himself - Andre Gregory

“I met my father for the first time when I was 28 years old. I made up my mind that when I had children, my children were going to know who their father was.”
Will Smith - Christopher Gardner

“Some women are drippin' with diamonds, some are drippin with pearls. Lucky me, look what I'm drippin' with: little girls!”
Kathy Bates - Miss Agatha Hannigan

“You know every story, every wound, every memory. Their whole life's happiness is wrapped up in you.”
Julia Roberts - Isabel Kelly

Do you mind if I name my first child after you? "Dipshit Knight" has a nice ring to it.

Val Kilmer - Chris Knight

“Having a child is like owning a car. I can change the oil and fill the gas tank and I can take it to a car wash, but if the carburetor broke, I wouldn't know what to do.”

Mary-Louise Parker - Lillian

“I'll tell you one thing: this home, with your family, is as a fine place to bring up a baby as an alligator farm!”

Lee Tracy - Space Hanlon

“- Kid #3: My Mommy says smoking kills.
- Nick Naylor: Oh, is your Mommy a doctor?
- Kid #3: No.
- Nick Naylor: A scientific researcher of some kind?
- Kid #3: No.
- Nick Naylor: Well, then she's hardly a credible expert, is she?”
Courtney Taylor Burness - Kid #3
Aaron Eckhart - Nick Naylor

“That's one of the advantages of being an adult. You get to act like a kid anytime you feel like it.”

George Clooney - Jack Taylor

“You know, kindergarten is like the ocean. You don't want to turn your back on it.”
Penelope Ann Miller - Joyce

“You think that I want that baby because l've got some hole in my life or I think I'm gonna have some hole in my life, but that's not it. Or if it is it, it's just a part of it. That baby needs someone to love it and take care of it. Something has happened. You can't go back and have it not happen. Some kind of connection has been made. lt has to...” (continue)(continue reading)

Mary McDonnell - Claire

“1. He's scared. 2. He's a kid. They always lie. Adults are the enemy, remember?”

Tommy Lee Jones - Roy Foltrigg

“- John Nash: She's so small.
- Charles: Well, she's young, John. That's how they come.”

Russell Crowe - John Nash
Paul Bettany - Charles

“Children, phooey. You give them everything they want, and what do you get back in return? You get nothing! Why they're just smaller versions of us you know, but I'm not so crazy about me in the first place, so why would I want one of them? I'm asking ya. Children. Ah, children. Little children. You'll pour your heart to them, you give them...” (continue)(continue reading)
Ray Walston - Poopdeck Pappy

“- John Harris, Sr.: Oh by the way, I'm coming to pick up my kids on Saturday.
- Bernadine Harris: Yeah? If I hear you had 'em anywhere near that tramp bitch, you're gonna regret it for the rest of your life!”
Michael Beach - John Harris, Sr.
Angela Bassett - Bernadine Harris

“Kids are great for a comedian, because kids are funny without even trying to be funny.”
Jeff Foxworthy - Jeff Foxworthy

“- Bob: I want a safe conduct pass to Chapei.
- Gen. Yen: What on Earth to do you want to go there for? That's an inferno.
- Bob: That's why I must go. Our orphanage is between the lines. The children are in danger.”
Gavin Gordon - Bob
Nils Asther - Gen. Yen

“We might have to live here for a long time! Maybe the rest of our lives! If we are stuck here until we get old, then we can't go on acting like kids! We've got to be sensible and make things work!”

Danuel Pipoly - Piggy

“Swift reached the terrified child and, holding him tightly, swung him through the bay window of the embassy into his mother's outstretched... and eternally grateful arms.”

Tom Selleck - Phil Blackwood

“Miss Ivory, having carefully considered the advantages and disadvantages, I feel it is my duty to ask you to become my wife so that no man may say a Trilling child might be a bastard.”
Robert Portal - Cedric

“- Meela: What a bright little child. Your mother must be missing you terribly. If you wish to see her again, you'd better behave.
- Alex: Lady, I don't behave for my parents. What makes you think I'm going to do it for you?
- Meela: Because your parents wouldn't slip poisonous snakes into your bed while you were sleeping.”
Patricia Velasquez - Meela
Freddie Boath - Alex

“- George: We can't throw out the option of having a babysitter just because we had a bad one. We'll find somebody really responsible to look after the kids.
- Alice: Over my dead body.”

Charles Grodin - George Newton
Bonnie Hunt - Alice Newton

“- Mel: Have you even known the joys of having children?
- Richie: Never had a date.
- Clark: Never talked to a girl.”
Jon Lovitz - Mel
David Spade - Richie
Jon Heder - Clark

“Do I interfere when absolutely helpless women tell me they simply can't have an abortion - that they simply must go through with having another and yet another orphan? I do not. I do not even recommend. I just give them what they want.”

Sir Michael Caine - Dr. Wilbur Larch