Health quotes

“- Carl Purdue: No thanks, I'm trying to quit.
- Ginger: These aren't cigarettes. They don't kill you. They let you live, baby.”

Adam Roarke - Carl Purdue
Val Kline - Ginger

“- Otis: I put my hand in my mouth after I touched all of that money. Could that be bad?
- Max: Of course. That's how germs are spread.”
Carlos Jacott - Otis
Chris Eigeman - Max

“When I get distress, I apply plunger therapy.”
Miguel Martinez - Hector

“Healthy, lusty sex is wonderful.”
John Wayne

“Happiness is good health and a bad memory.”
Ingrid Bergman

“It's strange I should be dead? I was young and healthy and I felt swell when I went to bed! So, why did I die?”
Joan Blondell - Gail Richards

“Wife's making her famous deviled eggs again, my waistline's furious.”
Michael Delaney - Bob Littleford

“- Seymour Krelborn: The Audrey II is not a healthy girl.
- Mushnik: Strictly between us - neither is the Audrey I.”
Rick Moranis - Seymour Krelborn
Vincent Gardenia - Mushnik

“- Fred Ritter: You're not in top form, and your backup battery is all used up!
- Johnny 5: I'm okay-kay, just a few biddly-biddly Bugs Bunny to work out in out in! Perfectly functionality, functionality!
- Fred Ritter: Oh yeah sure, listen to yourself, you can't even talk straight!
- Johnny 5: Derf, a life-form's gotta do what a life-form's...” (continue)(continue reading)
Michael McKean - Fred Ritter
Tim Blaney - Johnny 5

“Sanity's not a choice, Marshall. You can't just choose to get over it.”

Ben Kingsley - Dr. Cawley

“- John Winger: I've had an interesting morning. In the last two hours I've lost my job, my apartment, my car, and my girlfriend.
- Russell Ziskey: You still have your health.”
Bill Murray - John
Harold Ramis - Russell

“Didn't I ever tell you about my hemorrhoids? They get really bad when it's humid, you know?”
Phil De Carlo - Sam

“- Hannah Warren: Christ, five million cigarettes are murder on the lungs.
- Bill Warren: When you were younger you were the healthiest girl I knew. What happened?
- Hannah Warren: With Nixon in the White House, good health seemed to be in bad taste.”
Jane Seymour Fonda - Hannah Warren
Alan Alda - Bill Warren

“Now I know what a Muppet feels like.”

Sir Kenneth Branagh - Peter McGowan

“A healthy person is someone who expresses what they're feeling inside. Express, not repress.”
Meg Ryan - Kate

“Come on girl, haven't you ever cleaned a fish? You know there's nothing cruel about what I'm doing here. I treat most of my stock better than farmers treat their animals. I don't feed 'em chemicals or hormones. When you consider the way the world is today, there's no question I'm doing a lot of them a big favor.”

Rory Calhoun - Vincent Smith

“- Elliot Hopper: Mr. Nero, how are you?
- Mr. Nero: Oh, good. I'm eating solid foods again.”
Bill Cosby - Elliot Hopper
George Ganz - Mr. Nero

“- Shelby: What can I get here that has no sugar, no carbs, and is fat free?
- Sam: Water.”
Julie Gonzalo - Shelby
Hilary Duff - Sam

“- Chris Porter: Well sir, you look real good.
- Al Haynes: I tell you, it sure beats rigor mortis.”

Tom O'Brien - Chris Porter
Charlton Heston - Captain Al Haynes

“I'm trying to cook you guys a decent meal. You can't be living off burgers and pizza.”

Beau Bridges - Sam Woods

“Vegetarians? I've shit 'em.”
Ray Winstone - Carlin

“At least she died healthy.”

Ellen Lee DeGeneres - Sgt. Rita Pompano

“You got any idea how much fresh food's going for these days? And beef? I make more money selling hamburgers than I did selling reefer.”
Michael Wright - Elias Taylor

“Whoa! Look at those wrinkles. What is holding this woman together?”

David Spade - Kuzco

“- Young Michael: We can eat hot dogs, or we can eat air. Choose...
- Young Tommy: Air is probably safer, Mike...”
Brad Renfro - Young Michael
Jonathan Tucker - Young Tommy