Telephone quotes

“- Mark Baum: [on the phone] Ok, I want you to walk back in there and very calmly, very politely tell the risk-assessors to fuck-off!
- Vinnie Daniel: [Walks into the room] Gentlemen, I just spoke with Mark Baum and he says to 'fuck off'.”
Steve Carrell - Mark Baum
Jeremy Strong - Vinnie Daniel

“You'd be surprised how difficult it is relinquish a cell phone.”
Adrien Brody

“- Ford Fairlane: Hey, look. Write down my number: 555-6321. Got it?
- Twin Club Girl: Yeah. Wait a minute. 555 is not a real number. They only use that in the movies.
- Ford Fairlane: No shit, honey. What do you think this is? Real life?”
Andrew Dice Clay - Ford Fairlane

“- Navin: The new phone book's here! The new phone book's here!
- Harry Hartounian: Boy, I wish I could get that excited about nothing.
- Navin: Nothing? Are you kidding? Page 73: Johnson, Navin R.! I'm somebody now! Millions of people look at this book every day!”
Steve Martin - Navin
Jackie Mason - Harry Hartounian

“First electricity, now telephones. Sometimes I feel as if I were living in an H.G. Wells novel.”
Maggie Smith - Violet Crawley

“It's not easy to learn when you've got your head stuck in your phone.”
Mads Mikkelsen - Martin

“Sheila Wynne-Sounds like work.
Greville Wynne-No. Tell them I’m in my chair.
Sheila Wynne-Yes, he’s just walked in.”

Benedict Cumberbatch - Greville Wynne
Jessie Buckley - Sheila

“I’ll get another one. New life, new phone.”
K.J. Apa - Jeremy

“- Records Clerk: You just reached for my phone in a suspicious manner.
- David Waters: No, I didn't.
- Records Clerk: [ignores] That would suggest you're here under the auspices of illegal activity.”
Lisa Mack - Records Clerk
Elijah Wood - Waters

“- Duane Duke: Here's cab fare. Phone book's on the table.
- Red: Jesus, You make it all sound so cheap.
- Duane Duke: It is? But it beats a good vibrator.
- Red: Yeah? Well at least a vibrator gets me off!
- Duane Duke: Use the payphone, bitch!”
Jeff Fahey - Duane
Juliette Cummins - Red

“- Al Percolo: You don't have to yell, this is a different phone.
- Ron Wilson: It has nothing to do with the phone, I just like yelling at you.”
Albert Brooks - Al Percolo
Lane Smith - Ron Wilson

“You don't get it Stu. You. Just. Don't. Get It. I have over 60 apps on that phone. Do you know how much time and manhours it would take to redownload those apps?”

Zach Galifianakis - Alan

“- Operator: I have an emergency phone call from Mrs. Aurora Greenway in Houston, Texas, for Mrs. Emma Horton.
- Sam Burns: Oh no!
- Emma Horton: No, she always does this when the lines busy. It's fine.”
John Lithgow - Sam Burns
Debra Winger - Emma Horton

“- Dave Duerson: Drop it, or they’ll be doing your autopsy, Mr. Omalu.
- Dr. Bennet Omalu: Doctor Omalu [hungs up].”

Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje - Dave Duerson
Will Smith - Dr. Bennet Omalu

“Hi, leave a message after the beep. If you want to send me a fax, then buy me a fax machine.”

Richard Tiffany Gere - Ike Graham

“Hi, this is Martin Daniels, I'm not home right now but I got a bomb under city hall. Talk to you later.”

Charles Grodin - Martin Daniels

“I've never done well on the phone. Women find my voice sexy, and I think it distracts them.”
William H. Macy - Bill Porter

“Let me describe the scene to you. There are these guys, see? They've probably been up for like two days. They stink of B.O., they have coffee breath, they're constipated from sittin' on their asses for so long, they're sitting in a van, and they're probably parked right up the street from your office, Eddie. Your phone is tapped!”

Robert De Niro - Jack Walsh

“I never been in no cell that had a phone in it. Can I stay for a while, 'cause I ordered some pizza.”
Eddie Murphy - Axel Foley

“- Penelope Wood: Are you going to answer that?
- Josie McBroom: No, it's probably just my ex-boyfriend!”

Natascha McElhone - Penelope Wood
Alice Eve - Josie McBroom

“- Wade: [Looking at a text from Ajax] What is that?
- Weasel: That's the shit emoji. You know the turd with the smiling face and the eyes? I thought it was chocolate yogurt for so long.”
Ryan Reynolds - Wade
T.J. Miller - Weasel

Does "phone" mean something different in the future?
Nick Jonas - Alex

“I'm having an affair with my phone machine.”
Gérard Depardieu - Andre

“- Pamela Wincott: Come say 'hi' to your brother... Justin!
- Kyle Wincott: Leave him be. I am just over here dealing with minor insurgency. He is trying to save the whole universe.”

Lauren Graham - Pamela Wincott
Robbie Amell - Kyle Wincott

“I feel like ever since I lost my phone... my other senses have kind of heightened.”

Jack Black - Bethany