Women quotes

“I'm short for my height.”
Lucy Liu - Lindsey

“I've looked at so many women. I've seen everything, and felt nothing. But when I look at you, it hurts.”

Tobey Maguire - Homer Wells

“One of the ugliest bitches I've ever seen in my life rolled up, and I'm not one to call women ugly, but I think this woman was, because she had a penis.”
Dave Chappelle - Disco Cabbie

“I guess it's just my woman's intuition. Every woman has one, you know.”
Bonita Granville - Nancy Drew

- Wyatt Trips: You are an incubus. A hell-spawned incubus.
- Ivy Miller: Only a male can be an incubus, if anything, I'm a sucubus.
- Wyatt Trips: Yeah, you got the "suck" part right.
Paul Rudd - Wyatt Trips
Reese Witherspoon - Ivy Miller

“It's a funny thing about you women, most of you don't get wise soon enough! You wait until you're so old, nobody wants ya.”
Wallace Ford - Phroso

“Say you meet one of these no sparks women, and you really take the time to get to know her and then you become intellectually stimulated by her. You just really enjoy her personality, thereby igniting all your lust and passion. Have you ever thought about that?”

Janeane Garofalo - Abby

“- Martha Corey: I, sir, am innocent to a witch. I know not what a witch is.
- Judge Hathorne: If you know not what a witch is, how do you know you are not one?”
Mary Pat Gleason - Martha Corey
Robert Breuler - Judge Hathorne

“- Larry: Alice, tell me something true.
- Alice: Lying's the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off - but it's better if you do.”
Clive Owen - Larry
Natalie Portman - Alice

“- Morgan: What, are you officially a woman now?
- Nick Marshall: I wish!”
Mark Feuerstein - Morgan Farwell
Mel Gibson - Nick Marshall

“- Rudy: Do you like her?
- Tripper: I feel sorry for her, you know. She's got a glass eye. And, uh, I'm one of the few people who knows exactly which eye to look at when they're talking to her, so she's sort of fixated on me.”

Chris Makepeace - Rudy
Bill Murray - Tripper

“If you ever put your hands on me again, I'm gonna snip your little nuts off with my toenail clippers!”

Jenny Lewis - Rita Faldes

“- Danny Madigan: Where are the ordinary, everyday women? They don't exist because this is a movie!
- Jack Slater: No, this is California.”
Austin O'Brien - Danny Madigan
Arnold Schwarzenegger - Jack Slater

“Ever since I've been... gay... I've felt more comfortable around women than I've ever been.”
Johnathon Schaech - Parker Concorde

“- Marlak: Stay away from my woman.
- Zed: Not gonna be possible, Marlak. She's not your woman. You can't own people. Except for the guy who bought all of us. Apparently, he can.”
Matthew Willig - Marlak
Jack Black - Zed

“I was a virgin. My virginity was my most cherished possession. My gift from God. My gift was taken from me.”
Natalie Dormer - Victoria

“- Billy: You were right. Women are bad, masturbating's good.
- Charlie Anders: No... masturbating's lonely.”
Brendan Fehr - Billy
Max Beesley - Charlie Anders

“Women have choices, and men have responsibilities.”
Steve Martin - Gil

“As far as I'm concerned, a woman is like an elephant. I like to look at them, but I don't want to own one.”
Errol Flynn - Doug Lee

“- Steven M. Kovacs: Do... do you mean that Heather is a prostitute?
- The Cable Guy: Of course she is. You think a woman like that would hang out with us if we weren't paying her?”
Matthew Broderick - Steven M. Kovacs
Jim Carrey - The Cable Guy

“Women. Nice ones, the most frigid of the race, it doesn't matter in the end. Inside they're all the same meat and gristle and hatred just simmering.”
Aaron Eckhart - Chad

“Women are more devious than men. You're great at hiding things. You keep secrets. You smile when you lie. You expect a man to be a tower of strength. When he's got a few weaknesses and insecurities, what do you do? You turn around, and goddamn it, you betray him!”

Nick Nolte - Tom Wingo

“There's a real piece of idiocy: woman's instinct. Every snap-sightish woman in the world is a crystal gazer. She's magic. She can foretell the future. Like a politician.”

Ernest Cossart - Tom Foyle

“- Steve Brooks: It's kinda hard for me to believe that there aren't at least a couple of woman...
- God: Right now, I'll settle for one. So I've decided that you should go back and try to find one female who truly likes Steve Brooks. If you find her, you go to Heaven. If you don't, you will spend eternity in Hell.”

Perry King - Steve Brooks
Richard Provost - God

“I can't send a young pretty girl such as you ask on a job like this without telling her what to expect. To go off on a trip for no one knows how long, to some spot you don't even hint at, the only woman on the ship with the toughest mugs I ever looked at.”

Sam Hardy - Charles Weston