Sir Michael Caine movie quotes

“There are only two things I can't stand in this world: people who are intolerant of other people's cultures, and the Dutch.”
Sir Michael Caine - Nigel Powers

“- Lloyd Fellowes: Think of the first night as the dress rehearsal. If we can just get through the play once tonight - for doors and sardines. That's what it's all about, doors and sardines. Getting on, getting off. Getting the sardines on, getting the sardines off. That's farce. That's - that's the theatre. That's life.
- Belinda Blair: God,...” (continue)(continue reading)
Sir Michael Caine - Lloyd Fellowes
Marilu Henner - Belinda Blair

“Some men are beyond redemption.”
Sir Michael Caine - Royer-Collard

“- Dr. Watson: Holmes believes your father has been abducted.
- Leslie Giles: Abducted? By who?
- Sherlock Holmes: Abductors.”
Ben Kingsley - Dr. Watson
Lysette Anthony - Leslie Giles
Sir Michael Caine - Sherlock Holmes

“- Robert Angier: He's a dreadful magician.
- Cutter: No, he's a wonderful magician. He's a dreadful showman.”
Hugh Jackman - Robert Angier
Sir Michael Caine - Cutter

“- Alden Pyle: Have you had a lot of women, Thomas?
- Thomas Fowler: You start out by being promiscuous and end up like your grandfather... faithful to one woman.”
Brendan Fraser - Alden Pyle
Sir Michael Caine - Thomas Fowler

“The smell: that's the first thing that hits you, promising everything in exchange for your soul. And the heat. Your shirt is straightaway a rag. You can hardly remember your name, or what you came to escape from.”

Sir Michael Caine - Thomas Fowler

“- Cutter: Take a minute to consider your achievement. I once told you about a sailor who drowned.
- Robert Angier: Yes, he said it was like going home.
- Cutter: I lied. He said it was agony.”
Sir Michael Caine - Cutter
Hugh Jackman - Robert Angier

“- Bruce Wayne: Bats are nocturnal.
- Alfred: Bats may be, but even for billionaire playboys, three o'clock is pushing it. The price of leading a double life, I fear. Your theatrics made an impression.
- Bruce Wayne: Theatricality and deception are powerful weapons, Alfred. It's a good start.”

Christian Bale - Bruce Wayne
Sir Michael Caine - Alfred

“- Brad Crane: I have cardio-pep in my van.
- Captain Helena Anderson: Cardio-pep? I've just read an article in the medical journal about Cardio-pep! By some scientist named... Crane, I think.”
Sir Michael Caine - Brad Crane
Katharine Ross - Captain Helena Anderson

“- Sherlock Holmes: I see, and observe.
- Reporter #2: Isn't that rather redundant?”
Sir Michael Caine - Sherlock Holmes
Michael O'Hagan - Reporter #2

“- Isabel Bigelow: Isn't there a spell that can make you stop crying?
- Nigel Bigelow: No, darling, there isn't.
- Isabel Bigelow: He's idiotic, and yet I find him completely charming. It's been like that since the beginning. Only now, I also hate him.
- Nigel Bigelow: Love.”

Nicole Kidman - Isabel Bigelow
Sir Michael Caine - Nigel Bigelow

“- Philip Kimberley: It's wonderful to be forty two again. Do you think I'll live to be forty three?
- Boris Medvachian: If comrade Kuzminsky fails to deliver the dossier, our two friends there, they make sure he doesn't.”
Sir Michael Caine - Philip Kimberley
Morteza Kazerouni - Boris Medvachian

“Do I interfere when absolutely helpless women tell me they simply can't have an abortion - that they simply must go through with having another and yet another orphan? I do not. I do not even recommend. I just give them what they want.”

Sir Michael Caine - Dr. Wilbur Larch

“- Adm. Sir Gerald Scaith: Anything I can get you?
- Philip Kimberley: Vodka. Only vodka.
- Adm. Sir Gerald Scaith: None of that foreign nonsense here. You're in England now. Whiskey it'll be.”
Laurence Olivier - Adm. Sir Gerald Scaith
Sir Michael Caine - Philip Kimberley

“We produce books for the discriminating collector. The compulsive inmates set the type, the listless ones do the binding and prepare the ink.”
Sir Michael Caine - Royer-Collard

“- Harry Palmer: Tell me Nick, have you got a mole on the left cheek of your ass?
- Nick: No.
- Harry Palmer: Neither have I. We could be related.”
Sir Michael Caine - Harry Palmer
Jason Connery - Nick

“- Austin Powers: Your spy car's a Mini?
- Nigel Powers: It's not the size mate, it's how you use it.”
Mike Myers - Austin Powers
Sir Michael Caine - Nigel Powers

“I'm not running away. I'm just not the kind of person who gets a kick out of watching an automobile crash, particularly when it's my automobile! It's gonna be the worst catastrophe Broadway has ever seen. They're gonna forget their lines, the set will fall down. None of us will get out of New York alive; they've got big pictures of us in the...” (continue)(continue reading)
Sir Michael Caine - Lloyd Fellowes

“I don't follow other people's films.”
Sir Michael Caine - Sidney Cochran

“- Captain Robert Hatch - The Players: U.S.A.: Where do I stand for a corner kick?
- Capt. John Colby - The Players: England: At the far post, facing the ball.
- Captain Robert Hatch - The Players: U.S.A.: Thanks. For a while there I thought you were keeping it a secret.”

Sylvester Stallone - Captain Robert Hatch - The Players: U.S.A.
Sir Michael Caine - Capt. John Colby - The Players: England

“- Gen. Midwinter: Did you know for example, that the air in the East Coast of America is polluted by the reds? Oh, you might look at me, but boy, I tell you and I know that the air in Texas is the only truly wholesome air in this world. That is why I have not been out of Texas in twenty five years. I don't like the air in other places.
- Harry...” (continue)(continue reading)
Ed Begley - Gen. Midwinter
Sir Michael Caine - Harry Palmer

“You know what I think, don't you? I think I should get a gun. There are a lot of crazy people about, and they're all attracted to me.”

Sir Michael Caine - Noel Holcroft

“If I lost her, for me, it would be the beginning of death.”

Sir Michael Caine - Thomas Fowler

“- Celeste Whitman: You know... I have the shortest legs of anybody here.
- Captain Mike Turner: Do it!”

Sally Field - Celeste Whitman
Sir Michael Caine - Captain Mike Turner